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This is the day that the Lord has made

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"This is the day that the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it." -Psalms 118:24. This verse can be taken differently for everybody. I find comfort every time I read it. I'm not saying that life would be easier if we lived by this verse. But would it hurt to try? I sit here typing, and I have just been given the chance to say what my heart feels. I am being given the chance to tell my story. My life. You might think that it will be hard to read a story, since I am just your average American teenage girl. But I promise you, I won't let you down. I am Jen. I'm 16, and I live in a town in the middle of nothingness. I won't go into much detail about my past. I had a somewhat happy childhood. We all have a few bad memories from when we were younger, but there aren't enough of them to fuss over. I used to be a cheerleader before I decided to be active in drama and singing. I've been known to be nothing but a big ball of happiness and sunshine. But man oh man, 2007 has been nothing but disaster. It's been one of those years that start with a family problem, then when it goes away you have a friend problem, and then a school issue, and then your friend's parents hate you, and then you get into a big fight, blah blah blah. It never seems to end. The disasters start on the very night of January 1, where a short little blonde girl calls the police because one of her friends is out drinking illegally. She realizes the mistake that she's made, and receives quite the screamo at home. Soon this problem dissolves away, but then something else comes up. It's just a cycle. Yeah, that girl was me. Sure, this situation blew over, but every nightmare that happens reminds me of the beginning. I refuse to go into detail for every sob story of 2007, because that's not what my story is all about. But, 2007 was the start of a depression revolution. Don't get me wrong, I was already on antidepressants for obsessive-compulsive disorder. However, the dosage started increasing as things continued to go wrong. I depended on the medicine cabinet to make me happy. The purpose of my story isn't to get sympathy. Its purpose isn't to win money and boast. My story isn't to tell of my success in life. My story is to let me say what is in my heart. My story is comfort. I can tell you right now that there is no magical happy ending to my story. Let me rephrase that. There is no happy ending for my terrible struggles. There is no end to the world's wars. There is no prescription to heal the destruction of society. After all, we're only human. I am a Christian. As a Christian, I have faith in God. I have faith that somehow life will be fulfilled for every human being on Earth. It won't be easy. It's not meant to be easy. Through all the prescription pills and the hours of counselling, I can't face the battles without any hope in my heart. I can't just sit here and expect things to get better. I can't wait for a cure and not do anything about it. I can't expect life to change and make me happy. I can't. I just can't. I can, however, have faith. I can have hope and I can love everyone around me. I can promote peace. I can change my attitude toward life. I can have hope and strength that will lead me through every one of life's puzzles. If I have the attitude that life is worth living, I can make it. And so can every teenager in the world. If we take what we've learned and have hope in our hearts, we can accomplish what life throws at us. You might be wondering what happened to those antidepressants. They're still needed for obsessive-compulsive disorder. Cutting off of antidepressants will lead to withdrawal. But that's a different story for another day. Don't let life's struggles knock you down. Have an attitude of confidence and hope. Believe it in your heart that life is good, life is okay. Don't lose faith. You will make it. I promise. And maybe, just maybe, we can believe that Psalms 118:24 is telling the truth. This is the day that the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad.





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distant_dreamer said...
Jul. 31, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Great Job Jen!!! 5 stars! Keep on writing!
 
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