Domestic | Teen Ink

Domestic

April 29, 2012
By Majesty BRONZE, Hartford, Connecticut
Majesty BRONZE, Hartford, Connecticut
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Low income family is one of the highest in domestic violence. I was born to a low income family in Puerto Rico. I myself have experience domestic violence for seven years of my life. During those seven horrible years, I have witnessed and beared upon the pain of my mother being hit by my drunk step-father. Every minute and second of my life until I was seven years old I saw the blood been spilled, saw the way his hits were left upon my mom.

My mom wasn’t the only victim; I was also a victim too when he would hit me with a belt constantly. The marks didn’t last days, they lasted for months. One time, I remember when he was beating my mom and I saw my mom fight back which gave me courage to defend my mom because every time I would try, he was way too strong. But when I fought back, the anger that I had against him came over, me that was the day when my mom said no more, no more to being abused every day.

Before my mom left Puerto Rico to go to Hartford, Connecticut, I left my step father a note saying “You aren’t a man to be abusing my mother and I hope to never see you again”. Now that I am with my mom and my real dad, my dad has taught me never to raise your hand toward women no matter what. My dad always said that in order for a man to be a real man he must respect and never take your anger out on someone, especially not the person you love the most.

Domestic violence isn’t just hitting the spouse; verbal, threats against personal property, pets and other family members such as the child. The things that I witness were the worst, mom told me that for the first time in her life she thought that me and her where going to die due to domestic violence. Many children like me are faced with sadness, depression, the horrible past that will follow them for the rest of their life and also marks that are left on the body, by the abuse.

When a child become older and he/she find out that the fight between mom and dad is domestic violence. The past comes to their minds as a movie and all the tears that were held back. Begin to fall. Social economic groups between low-income group; middle income and high income families greatly varies on domestic violence? Some factors of the low; middle and high class are mostly the same, but one factor. Sets each class family apart. that is money and many abuse spouse don’t report it. Domestic violence has been in my life. I know how it feels and to be in that situation.

Social economical group between low-income group, middle income and high income families greatly varies on domestic violence. In the low-income families 95% of cases of domestic violence, women fall victim to their male partner’s abuse (Bachman &Saltzman, 1995 walker 1999). Women are more likely to be victimized than men; they are far more like to become the victims of ongoing abuse. Women in low income families are at elevated risk of victimization by men.#

Hispanic women are also at a high risk of domestic violence because of poverty. Stress builds up from having little, in low income families Men are more likely to hit their wife, girlfriends or ex-girlfriends because they would take it on their spouse that the reason why he live like this is their fault . Hispanics is the largest minority group in the nation. Hispanics in America make up 13% of the whole entire population and each year it keeps on growing more and more. In Puerto Rico they have the lowest rate of domestic violence but I disagree greatly. Many women in Puerto Rico don’t report their cases to the government.

The government in Puerto Rico is horrible, My mom mention that her friend at age 22 years old died in a domestic violence. She told the government that her husband was beating her up nonstop, she had evidence to prove the abuse of her husband, when the government took an act to help her against her domestic violence it was too late. Her husband found out that she had filed for domestic violence. When he saw her he pulled out a 9m hand gun and shot her right in her face in front of everyone. One out of four women in the low income family had been a victim of abuse.#

Many abusive husbands tell their wife that if they try to leave or filed for domestic violence he would kill her and her child including the whole family. My mom was faced with this decision; My mom didn’t file for domestic violence she left him. Cause he had threatened her that he was going to kill me with no mercy. In Puerto Rico 52 women everyday are victims of domestic violence. 22,274 cases were reported to the Puerto Rican Police department in 2004 and the numbers are rising. And between 2000 and 2004 36% of all women homicides in Puerto Rico was motivated by domestic violence. Many women are afraid of their controlling husbands In 2010 there were 17 women who were killed by their abusive husbands. In low-income groups the younger women who witnessed domestic violence, will most likely have higher rates to have a partner who is an abuser than older women. #

In middle class family domestic violence isn’t very high but there is still domestic violence present. Many women who are working a 40 hours a week or higher are most likely to not be expose to domestic violence because they will be working most of the time, they would be earning a lot of money, that if their husband tries to abuse them , they can stand tall and not take their abuse. But still some men would become jealous of their wife career that he would start saying things to make him feel superior and which would make her feel like crap, this verbal abuse bringing your wife life to a sudden turn of bad emotions cause the man would keep the verbal abuse making her feel worthless and lowering her self-esteem.

Many men in the middle class are the one who pays the bills and feeds everyone, Some of them take this as an advantage where he would abuse his wife just because she didn’t cook the meal right. This is where the advantage parts come. When men are the bread winners of the house the wife would think that she needs him, whatever abuse she gets from him , she will hide the bruise , smile and act like nothing ever happen.

This poem here is a very touching poem which made me cry a little.

Middle Class Domestic Violence

By: Melissa M.

11/22/2011 / Self Help

Daddy is hitting Mommy again,

She tries to run but he always wins.

The children run to their rooms and weep,

They'll cry until they fall asleep.

The pillows are wet with their tears,

Screams and nightmares reveal their fears.

He gives her flowers after the fight,

He says, "I'm sorry, it will be alright."

She hides the bruises black and blue,

He made by hitting her with his shoe.

He blames the beer when he gets mad,

He reminds her of her dad.

Then he will clean the house and wash all the dishes,

Treat her like a queen and grant all her wishes.

He only beats her every 90 days,

The other 89that's why she stays.

He is quiet and sometimes kind,

Except when alcohol is on his mind,

He takes them to church every Sunday,

They sing, laugh, and have a fun day.

They live in a big house on the hill,

He provides well and pays the bills.

She reads her Bible and prays each night,

Asking God to make her a better wife.

This poem opens my heart as I read the poem a mind movie was in my head of the little kids Crying High -income families have a very low rate in domestic violence because it doesn’t occur much but no matter what domestic violence is still present in high class families.

Their husband can lead to their wife to death because the wife wont reports because it would ruin their Husbands’ reputations in the high class. Just like in the movie of Tyler Parry Diary of a Mad Black Women. The movie is about Helen. Helen has everything a women wants a nice house, a Nice car, nice jewelry and a rich husband. However after her husband Charles throws her out of the house after admitting to an affair a distraught Helen turns to her mother, grandmother Madea.

Helen learns for the first time in her life to stand up on her two feet and is ready to Remove herself from her relationship with Charles and move on with Orlando. But when her Husband is almost killed by a vengeful client, Helen wonders if she has the heart to forgive him despite everything he has done to her. (Tyler Parry).#

Some factors of the low, middle and high class are mostly the same but one factor makes each class family apart and that is money. Money is what makes people poor and rich. As you have read through all of this paper domestic violence is change by money. When a low income wife can’t support herself and has a abusive husband she will stay with him so she can get help by his money, in the middle class family women are most likely to leave their abusive partners cause she can depend on herself, but when it comes to a high class family women would most likely stay cause she can get all the benefits of their husband wealth. Money is everything in this society money controls life.

At the end we can all learn that domestic violence is wrong. I have witness and bear upon the pain of my mother getting hit by my step-father. Domestic violence is growing in our society everyday more and more women are been killed by their abusive husband, many of them commit suicide leaving their children’s behind to a man who is unfit to become a father.

Recently on December 15, 2011 a man shot his wife in her apartment. Alyceson Archer Williams was soon pronounced dead at Hartford hospital she left 2 children’s behind. Alyceson mother told police that Rocky Williams was threatening Alyceson that he was going to killed her after the court proceeding on their case of child support issues.

Alyceson was shot in the chest 1 time when she ran for the front door for help by her ex-husband. (Rocky William) shot her and then shot her again at her chest. She died at her front door; paramedics soon came where they tried to revive her at Harford hospital but never came back to life.

They charged Rocky Williams with capitol felony, two counts of murder, home invasion and other charges. She was shot on Maple Ave, Hartford, CT not even 0.2 miles away from Hartford hospital. It’s sad to hear these stories, but us as a society should learn more about domestic violence and for more women to be aware about domestic violence; they should know that there is help they shouldn’t feel like they are trap with their abusive husbands there is help. 1?800?799?SAFE-(7233) or TTY 1?800?787?3224 this is the number for getting help. I wish no other kind would go thru the experience I had in a domestic violence.#


The author's comments:
The things I been through in life and a my mom who has raised me to be the person who I'm today

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