He's always there no matter what and that says a lot. The people who we think will stick with us sometimes fall off and you find yourself in an unknown position. I thought I knew but now they're gone and I'm left with a huge knife to pull out my back, but he's here gracefully pulling it out. He's my true friend. He stayed with me when the pressure of life got so heavy it suffocated me until I finally gave in. I longed for attention from the guy, I wanted to be his girl. I started proving myself to him and his friends. They soon became my friends and I was finally his girl. That night I said I loved him. His expression took my heart through a shredder and dropped the little pieces on my last ounce of dignity. He only told me he loved me for one thing. The next day everything changed. Some other girl was his girl and I was the girl who made a mistake. I made stupid choices, but he was still there. When they left me on the ground to deal with my problems he came and picked me up. I said some horrible things to the ones I love the most. They walked away; he stood there and took it. Night after night I cried, mourning the true friends that no longer cared for me and my issues. Night after night I relived problem after issue. Now I have learned that forgiving I and them is golden. My heavy heart was released of the pounds of agony and turmoil that it had bared. It started with wrong choices and began when my father picked me up and told me he loved me and meant it.
July 9, 2010