Feedback on Sight Lines | Teen Ink

Feedback on Sight Lines

October 12, 2016
By skyyyyyyy SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
skyyyyyyy SILVER, Brooklyn, New York
7 articles 0 photos 1 comment

       “Sight Lines” by Ophelia Hiney is a descriptive work of fiction that features Maurice, the test subject for a new invention that can see “sight lines”. Sight lines seem to be microscopic lights that indicate life. Maurice is put in the middle of a white chamber with padded walls and panels for people to crawl through. She puts on her visor as the lights turn off. Men crawl into the chamber as Maurice counts any visible sight lines. When the lights turn back on after two minutes, Maurice reports to have counted 12 sight lines in total. The experiment was conducted once again, but the results were the same. Derek, the scientist, urges Maurice to exit the chamber immediately, and the reader discovers that only 11 men were sent into the room.
         I really enjoyed reading this fictional piece. Ophelia uses very descriptive words that painted very vivid images in my mind. The text states, “He looked down into the testing room, where Maurice stood in the center of a whitewashed chamber, complete with padded walls and fluorescent lights.” This places the reader right next to Maurice, as if you’re living the moment with her, and experiencing the same excitement as the lights turn off and start counting the lines that appear around you. The end of this story leaves the reader hanging in suspense, itching to know what happens to Maurice in the chamber, and whether the other sight line was simply a malfunction, or actually another life force.



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