I never thought... | Teen Ink

I never thought...

March 6, 2009
By Anonymous

I never thought I'd be where I am today. Just at the starting point of being a teen I was already in for a bumpy ride. The middle of my teenage years wasn't happy. When I was fifteen, my mom passed away from suicide and things were never the same again. Some people like me are in the hospital on their sweet sixteenth birthday. I was very mentally sick when I was turning my sweet sixteen. My dad planned this party for my sisters and me: a moon jump, a cotton candy machine, snow cones, lots of food, pi'ata, everything you could imagine. I was surrounded by my friends and family. It seemed as if nothing was wrong, but deep inside I knew I had to speak up to my dad and tell him what was going on, but I decided to wait another day. The whole time while my sisters and everyone was outside, I was hiding and staying inside in the basement. I was so cold I wore my jacket in eighty degree weather. It was more like my "bitter sweet sixteen" than sweet sixteen. I made it through the party on July twenty-sixth. Then on July twenty-seventh (my real birthday), my dad made me go to the hospital because I wasn't sleeping, eating, or drinking, and was hearing voices. I hadn't slept or ate in a week. My dad didn't know anything was wrong until I told him. It was the right choice and I don't regret it because I might not be here if I didn't tell what was happening to me. I was so dehydrated I could have died. All I did that summer was listen to music and sleep upstairs because I was afraid the government was after me. I would talk to a voice in my head non-stop. I was in my own little world and there was no way to get out except through going through it. Once I got the help I needed at the hospital and going to a therapeutic school my life turned around. I learned that I should enjoy my youth! It's only a short fragment of my life. 'However many years you live, let her enjoy them all. Be happy while you are young and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart. Banish anxiety from your heart,' (Ecclesiastes 11:9-10 ).We have to enjoy the time that is given to us. If you didn't have a happy childhood or sweet sixteen think about what Joel Osteen said in one of his books, "God can give you back the years the devil has stolen. He can turn back time.' I think every year gets better and better. I can now say I love life. Every year gets better and better. I did have a sweet seventeen, eighteen, and nineteenth birthday! I can say now, I am enjoying my last year as a teen and look forward to the years to come.


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