Grain of Sand This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

December 13, 2009

From that moment, we are ripped from the padlocks, chains, and intricate electronic security devices that we had tackled onto our doors. Suddenly, it is as if the interstitial properties of steel no longer apply, and we can only watch helplessly as bonds are broken - vaporized - without any regard to the physical laws that rule this world. And, once the metal door reveals itself to be but discarded plywood, it splinters without much resistance and darkness swarms our vision.

It has been said that darkness is just the absence of light, but here, light is merely the absence of darkness. Like a single grain of sand falling into a supersaturated solution, instantly, as darkness pours in, we find that we cannot see. We cannot see anything except that point of darkness.

Bruised and tender, our egos take on the image of a whimpering Tom Riddle beneath a seat of King Cross’s train station. Denial? Affirmation forces us to spit out the words like bloody teeth. Repression? Affirmation’s smoky, twisted fingers drag the truth through our minds. Disassociation? Affirmation sings ever so gleefully in contrast to the caged bird, materializing bars over our heads. Reaction formation? Affirmation guffaws along with our ridiculous laughter, a Dionysus slurping his wine, saliva frothing with madness.

As we attempt to play our Rachmaninoff partially clothed, or try to rationalize why we wrote the stark truth on English assignments for all to view, we realize it does not matter - our defense mechanisms are effortlessly crushed by Affirmation. Cowardice is the farthest from efficacious; we are unable to abscond when we, ourselves, are the ones that speak what we cannot bear to hear.

We are so bent on coping with such an irritating grain of sand, that we cannot marvel at the beauty of the pearl.

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