The Suicide Note | Teen Ink

The Suicide Note

September 9, 2013
By Anonymous

It was July 4th, 2012, it was a sizzling hot day in Trouble Town, New Jersey. Delaney was in her room all by herself while her friends and family went to check out the extravagant fireworks down the boardwalk. It was one of the biggest nights in Trouble Town, New Jersey and Delaney Smith was all by herself. She thought and thought to herself. Thinking about how unhappy she is a tear falling down her checks is wiped away by another falling down. This happens quiet often, she is always crying and always alone. No one understands what she is going through.
Everyone sees this bright, beautiful, brunette with a huge grin on her face. She was always laughing and was always with someone in and outside of school. How could she be that broken girl at home? She doesn't really know why she is this depressed all the time. She isn't good enough for her friends and her statues of popularity is not what she wants, also she doesn't fit in, that's what Delaney thinks. While everyone else thinks she is perfect and happy.
12 o'clock am rolls around and Delaney had just fallen asleep and her eyes were hurting so bad from all the crying she had just done. Her mom and dad marched in the house yelling and screaming. They yelled many things one time they yelled "Party is here." Then about twenty other adults walked in who looked like they were a little tipsy. I take that back they were really tipsy. Delaney heard all the ruckus going on down stairs, but she knew this was going to happen. It happened about every week and it is worst during the school year. Delaney's parents love partying and drinking. She has gotten use to it and she is now a deep sleepier. Her parents didn't care that Delaney was trying to sleep. So Delaney tried going back to bed.
The next morning came and went. Delaney had been sleeping all day her mom bangs on the door and kicks it to. Delaney finally opens the door after her mom had been trying to wake her up for about an hour. Her mom who was in the worst mood tells her to get down stairs now it was dinner time. Delaney was shocked that it was already dinner time, she had stayed up late crying, but not that late. Delaney explained "Well I guess I just didn't want to wake up, I wanted to sleep forever."
Her mom replied "You know that is so terrible to say about yourself, now get down stairs we need to have a talk with you over dinner." Delaney thought to herself why what were they going to yell at her for now. She hadn't done anything wrong the night before or really any night before that, all she does is stay home.
Dinner was not a big thing in the Smith home since it was only Delaney, her mom, and her dad. Sometime her dad wasn't even there because he had work. Delaney was an only child, she did not have a brother to annoy her and she didn't have a sister to be best friends with. It was time to make their dinner plates. Her dad had warmed up left over hamburgers they had left from their July 4th barbecue. They all sat down at the table in their normal spots, her mom was on the right end of her and her dad on the other side. The table was really small, they never had guest over and if they did everyone would be outside. Her mom, who also went by Mrs. Sam or Mrs. Smith, stated with anger "Delaney, I'm sick and tired of you laying around all day. You haven't done one thing all summer, so I signed you up for service hours at the convention center tomorrow." Delaney needs a certain amount of service hours each year before starting the new school year and she hadn't gotten any yet.
Delaney replied "fine," she didn't want to make her mom even more mad, after all she still didn't get over her anger from Delaney not waking up. Plus it was not going to be that bad only a couple of hours.
It was Monday morning and it was summer time and Delaney Smith was down stairs eating cereal. She was usually just going to bed at this time during the summer. She was dressed in gym shorts and tennis shoes because she was going to be doing handy work today. Finally after waiting for a long time her mom gets in the passenger seat because Delaney has her permit which means she can only drive with an adult. Delaney had just turned 15 on June 3rd. Twenty boring minutes had past and they arrived at the convention center. Her mom dropped her off, that is all she had to do, because Delaney has been to this place before for her previous service hours that she had to complete for last school year.
Delaney walked in the convention center and was soon greeted by a nice woman who told her about all the things she had to do. This place collected many random things. Citizens would donate things they didn't need or want anymore and the people in the convention center would give it to poor people who need these things and can not afford it. People donated clothes, toys, luggage, furniture and many more things. People had donated a lot of suitcases. Delaney's job was to move them all from the huge pile of them to the back closet.
Delaney carried two suitcases a smaller one and a big one. She walked to the closet and sat them next to the closet because she had to check if they were completely empty before putting it in the closet. She opened the small one and nothing was left behind in it. Next she opened the larger one of the two. She noticed a piece of paper which looked like a letter, but she wasn't positive. She thought it was strange because pretty much every other suitcase was empty or had crumbs and trash in it, but none of them had a letter in it. Why would someone leave this in there? This suitcase had a letter in it, that was written very neatly and looked like who ever wrote this took a lot of time to write it. Delaney grabbed the note and she knows that it is not right to read it because it is not for her, but she decides to read it anyway. The note was addressed to "My Family," it also came with a picture of a young boy who looked the same age as Delaney. She had seen that face around, maybe at school, but she hasn't seen him around lately. He might have moved away and got rid of a bunch of stuff. Maybe that is why his suitcase was there.
As she reads the note she realizes that Jacob, the writer of the note and the boy in the picture, is saying his goodbyes and saying sorry a lot. Delaney finishes reading the note in utter shock because this wasn't a normal note it was a suicide note.
Delaney thinks and she knows for sure she has seen this Jacob guy around recently. The note was written six months ago before she had even moved to the school she goes to now. So if he had, hopefully he had not, killed himself she would have never seen him. Delaney finishes her job at the convention center and goes home. She sits on her bed thinking what she is going to do about the note. Does Jacob still feel so depressed that he wants to kill himself, did his family ever read that note, and could she help him?
Summer ended and Delaney goes back to her school still thinking about the note and Jacob. Lunch roles around and she spots him, the guy in the photo. He was all by himself outside of the cafeteria. Delaney goes straight up to him and confronts him about the letter and he claimed he didn't write it. Delaney does not believe him, but she won't be mean to him because he obviously has been through tough times already. Jacob then asks her to sit with him, she says, "of course!" They start to get to know each other over the disgusting potatoes the cafeteria had served. Delaney had the potatoes Jacob did not eat anything because he was hungry.
Through the first semester Jacob and Delaney were inseparable. They had their own little spot in the park they would just sit and talk at. They talked about all their problems and they helped each other out. They found out a lot about each other. They found out that they had so much in common. Delaney was finally happy on the outside and on the inside all because she had someone she could share here feelings with and he would never judge her. Jacob and Delaney were pretty much the best of friends until one day.
Delaney and Jacob were having a normal conversation and a kid walked by and said " Excuse me why are you talking to yourself?"
"No my friend is right here," Delaney giggle and exclaimed and she points to her right. She pointed there because she thought the boy could just not see him behind the tree. Delaney turned around and no one was there. The little kid says "No one was here with you all day and you are always by yourself here." Delaney is shocked by this startling news. Jacob never wanted to go outside, go inside his house, or hang out with her friends, but Delaney just thought it was because he was depressed. She just wanted to make him happy again. He had made her happy again, but now she was broken. How could he do that and why?
Jacob was a ghost and he was a complete lie to her. She was so mad even when she saw him after she had found out Delaney did not go up to him. He slowly disappeared completely. Delaney looked into the school news back to six months ago and a guy named Jacob committed suicide. She also found out that his family moved away and donated the suit cases to the convention center.
Delaney thought to herself, did his family see the note. Did they get the closure they needed. So Delaney found out were the family moved and she mailed them the letter.
Delaney went back to the convention center for more service hours and she had to put more suitcases in the closet. She saw a note and it was from Jacob. The note said that he was sorry and he was only trying to save her, because she was broken like him. Delaney wiped away her tears, she felt like a jerk for ignoring him, but they were ultimately happy tears. Jacob had saved her life not hurt it.


The author's comments:
I wrote this because there are so many struggles being a teenager and people are so much more sad then really seem. One person can change your whole out look on life they can make if amazing or they can hurt it.

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