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The Protector

Sent
“Well here we are,” my aunt Eva says.

I look up to stare at my new house and was amazed. It was three stories tall with ivy encasing its walls. Rose bushes slightly hid the high, arching windows, while a large rooster weather vane spun in the light breeze. Beautiful trees, just transitioning from Spring to Fall, littered the surrounding land. If I wasn’t dreading the prospect of living here, I might have thought the place was pretty. Trying to be nice to my aunt, I put on a big smile and slouched into the house.


After a long dinner and a tour of the house I was ushered into my ne room by my aunt. Sluggish from an over-full stomach, and nervous of about a first day at school, I really didn’t pay attention to the room. I had only eyes for a large king size bed with plush pillows. I choose a pair of pajamas from my duffel bag and jumped into bed. Just as I was drifting off to sleep, I heard the floorboards outside creak.

Was it Aunt Eva coming to check on me? Could it just me my imagination? Curious and a little scared at the same time, I slipped out of bed and pulled on a sweater. Then, equipped with a flashlight I opened the door and crept out. After exploring a few hallways, I came to one with an open window. The flimsy curtains rippled eerily in the dark.
“Is anyone there?”
“If I show myself do you promise not to tell anyone of my existence,” a quiet voice whispers.

I consider the offer for a moment. Well if this person or thing is a threat I could always run for it, I think.
“I promise.”
“Here I am,” the voice says from behind me.

Whirling around I find myself face to face with a tall boy with shoulder length, dirty blond hair. He must have been around fifteen years-old, judging from the stubble beginning to grow on his face and neck. His emerald green eyes stared calmly in to mine leaving me slightly mesmerized. The boy wasn’t wearing a shirt, only dusty, army green pair of shorts. His bare feet had a worn down as if he had been walking a long way.
“Who are you,” I ask?
“My name is Noah,” he replies.
“Why are you here?”
“I was sent here to protect you.”
“By who,” I almost yell!
“I was sent by the Gods.”




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Apollo77 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 14, 2012 at 8:14 pm:
Um...its interesting, and writen well...but i dont understand why this noah would just give up hiding. "oh you came somewhat close to my hiding spot, you got me!" but that's just me. I think it moves too quickly and you realy must explain farther than "the gods sent me" that cliff hanger is too ubrupt. Dont get me wrong, i love a good cliff hanger. They are suppose to leave a reader thinking and keep a reader on the verge of tears while ripping their hair out over what happens next. Yours is int... (more »)
 
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KateyKat said...
Jul. 23, 2012 at 7:21 pm:
A good beggining of a story, it just needs a little more detail towards the end. Keep up the good work!
 
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