the nightmare | Teen Ink

the nightmare

February 9, 2011
By Anonymous

Dictionary.com defines a dream as, “an involuntary vision occurring to a person while asleep, due to memories or fantasies of one’s subconscious mind.”
“Savannah! Hurry up! We were supposed to leave twenty minutes ago!” Katie, Savannah’s friend shouts. Savannah runs down the stairs, shoots out the door, and leaps into the car just as Katie speeds away.
“We can’t be late again or we’ll have detention,” Savannah mumbles as she pulls on her plaid skirt and new shoes.
“Did you at least sleep well?” Katie asks nervously as they pull up to West Beach High.
“Oh, I’ll tell you about that later!” Savannah pushes her way out the car and runs to class as the bell rings. She slams open the door and sees everyone running around. Excitement always fills the air on the first day of a new school year. She breezes through her classes and goes to soccer practice after school. On her way home she notices a woman walking on the street. She recognizes her but can’t remember from where. When she gets home at around 6:00, she is just in time for dinner. As soon as she sits down at the table, tears begin to roll down her face.
“What’s wrong baby?” Savannah’s mom, Rachel, asks persistently.
“It feels like I’ve been in a daze all day! It’s like my life is on fast forward. I can’t tell when I am asleep, or when I am awake. I don’t even remember what I did at school today. I feel like I am in a dream!” Savannah cries.
“Honey, go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day, and everything will be better. I promise,” her mom pleads. She listens to her mom, and mopes to her room, telling herself it will all be better tomorrow.
The next day, Savannah’s mother wakes her up. She tells Savannah that she needs to rush into work early because she needs to meet with Mrs. Rosewood. Savannah’s mom has been a banker for fifteen years. Mrs. Rosewood goes to Kentwood Bank once a year to make a very large deposit. Every time she makes a deposit it is with Savannah’s mom. When Savannah’s mom arrives to work she sees a pile of money lying on her desk. Mrs. Rosewood had stopped by, dropped off the deposit, and left.
You see, Savannah’s mom has been a very reliable bank teller—someone who Mrs. Rosewood knows she can count on. Since Savannah’s mother has been having money trouble she decides to take an “unauthorized loan”. She slyly takes the 50,000 dollars off the counter and sticks it into her purse. ‘Desperate times call for desperate measures.’
‘Now I can pay off my bills, and I will deposit the money back into Mrs. Rosewood’s account. She’ll never know,’ Savannah’s mom attempts to convince herself.
On her way home she calls Savannah,
“Savannah I want to take you shopping. Let’s make up for lost times, okay?”
“Umm oh-okay Mom,” Savannah stutters.
“Meet me at Saks!” her mother says with excitement. She has been trying not to shop in order to save money ever since her husband walked out on them.
“But… But mom…” There is a ten second silence before Savannah says, “Okay I’ll see you there.”
The bill ends up coming to three thousand dollars worth of designer clothes. You name it, they bought it. Savannah is very curious of how and where her mom got this kind of money, but she is afraid to ask.
The next day Savannah goes to get a cookie and in the cookie jar, to her astonishment, is over 20,000 dollars in cash. Her mom walks in and sees the money in Savannah’s hand.
“I can explain,” her mother insists.
“Mom, I knew something was up. What did you do, rob a bank?!”
“No Savannah! You know I have been going through a lot lately. Mrs. Rosewood came to the bank the other day and dropped off this money to deposit. I will replace it before she even notices it’s gone, I promise.”
“Okay mom, I know you will.” Savannah says as she hugs her mother.
“Go on to bed; you need to get up early tomorrow for school,” Savannah’s mother gives her a kiss on the forehead.
Savannah goes up to her room, lies down, and immediately falls asleep. The next day, she wakes up and hits her head on the edge of her bed-post. She touches her head and sees blood on her hand. She immediately runs to the bathroom. She puts her head under the faucet and begins to rinse the cut off when she hears a voice coming from behind her:
“You’re mom stole my money. I have already punished her; now it’s your turn.” It was the lady she had seen walking on the street the other day!
“AGHHHHH!” Savannah screams at the top of her lungs. Frantic about what to do, she runs out the bathroom and finds her mom tied up to a chair in the kitchen. She turns around and sees the old lady still hobbling down the stairs.

“Call 911, Savannah! Call 911 now!” Savannah’s mother yells. Savannah runs to the phone, but Mrs. Rosewood stops her, “I am not here to cause fright my dear, I simply want justice.”
She hold up a kitchen knife and goes in for the stab…
“BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP”
“Savannah, honey, time to get up,” Savannah’s mother calls from downstairs. Savannah, startled by her alarm, pops up and hits her head on the bed post. IT WAS ALL A DREAM! Savannah, frightened, runs downstairs and looks around the house for her mother. She is nowhere to be found.
“Mom! Where are you?!” Savannah shouts. She hears nothing but complete silence for about thirty seconds.
“Savannah, honey, do you want a ham or turkey sandwich in your lunch today?” Savannah’s mother asks.
“MOM, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? I HAVE BEEN A NERVOUS WRECK! I HAD THE WORST DREAM EVER. AND WHEN I FINALLY WAKE UP YOU’RE NOT EVEN HERE!”
“I’m sorry; I just went to get the newspaper…”
“Mom, you need to return the money, now. I had a horrible dream that Mrs. Rosewood knew we took the money and came to our house to get her justice.”
“Okay, I’ll see what I can do…I promise,” Savannah’s mother insisted.
Throughout the day Savannah could not get her mind off Mrs. Rosewood and the money. She was impatiently waiting for the end of the day, so she could go home and make sure everything was okay. Finally, around 7:00 Savannah arrives at home and is so tired from soccer practice she lays down on her bed and passes out immediately. After three hours of deep sleep she is awoken by a banging on her door. She jolts out her bed to open the door and sees a letter carefully placed on the ground with a trail of blood leading to her mother’s room. She opened the letter which read:
“You are next unless I get my money back.”
Savannah then feels something wet dripping down her face. She jumps up and finds her dog licking her. It was another dream! Savannah runs out her room, but feels something beneath her feet. It was a letter, very similar to the one in her dream. She opened the letter and it read:
“You are next, unless I get my money back.”
Savannah shoots to her mother’s room and finds her lying on the bed. She shakes her awake in a panic, “MOMMY NOT NOW.” She shouts.
“What do you want? I’m sleeping,” her mother mumbles.
“Oh mom I had the worst night mare. You HAVE to return the money to its rightful owner,” Savannah shouts.
“Okay, I will today.”
“I’m coming with you,” Savannah insists.
They get ready and take a trip to the bank to return the money to its rightful owner. Mrs. Sanderson, the bank manager, walks in and tells Savannah’s mother that Mrs. Rosewood had a heart-attack and passed away. Rachel’s heart stops. She took money from a dead person! Guilt overcame her and tears began to roll down her face.
The next morning Savannah woke up with a letter right outside her door saying, “I warned you.”


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This article has 4 comments.


on Feb. 14 2011 at 4:06 pm
LovelyMiss GOLD, Floresville, Texas
11 articles 0 photos 124 comments
Yeah I'm not sure I got it either although it did have a nice story to it and maybe if you edit it again you can make it better and better to understand although I think you have some pretty good ideas!:)

ArcaneGhost said...
on Feb. 11 2011 at 4:47 pm
ArcaneGhost, Hendersonville, Tennessee
0 articles 0 photos 43 comments

Um, I'm not really sure I understood this very well. Two things you might want to practice is sentence variation and transitions, as they both can determine how easy the story is to follow.

You have some great ideas, keep at it!


on Feb. 10 2011 at 7:24 pm
theartgeek97 SILVER, Greenville, South Carolina
6 articles 3 photos 40 comments
Omg, can we say creepy? you could write horror/mysteries.

on Feb. 10 2011 at 5:36 pm
RobbieTheGirl BRONZE, Indianola, Iowa
3 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"And no one get's eaten by a yetti." Josh Gates
"Is he stalking her?" Peter Burke
"I'd have to look up the legal definition," Neil Caffery
"I never forget! Remember! I never forget!" Billy the Kid

Loved the twist!