August 21, 2010
By Damara...C GOLD, Mings Bight, Other
Damara...C GOLD, Mings Bight, Other
11 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Accept me for who I am, or, watch me as I go"!

What if there was something awful in this envelope. I mean it did come from a man on prison. What if he wants to kill me. ‘Okay, Damara you have to stop’ I kept telling myself. I could picture him sitting there sizing up every inch of the jail cell. Looking for a way to escape. To get me. My mom and dad were gone out of town and I was home alone. Then I heard the news lady on T.V say that there was a man that had escaped from prison and he was known as Tip.

I was in my room laying on my bed picturing the pretty colors of the sky. Then out of no where I heard this man say “ Damara, Damara where are you? I’m not gonna hurt you.” My door knob turned so slowly that it was like a mother opening a door and trying not to wake her sleeping baby.” I leaned all of my weight onto the door hoping and praying that he’d give up and leave. He never and he was to strong the door swung open and he grabbed me.

He had me now I was a goner, I studied his cold, dark, empty eyes searching for a sign of regret and something that would tell me I was going to be okay. I found nothing, no remorse for the children that he had abducted and then killed. Just this dark , tense feeling that sent endless shivers up my spine. “Let go of me !” I cried. Trying to break free of his chain gripping hands . He lifted me up and threw me over his shoulders. As I was kicking and screaming he brought me outside to his gigantic Chevrolet safari.

There were four side doors to the van two on each side. There were two huge windows on the back doors which swung open and always gave me that creepy feeling. In the windows there were drapery sheets, messy and torn like they were rushed up or like someone was tearing on them trying to release them from the rods that hung them up. He attempted to lower me from his shoulders without dropping me, not that he didn’t want to hurt me but for the simple fact that he didn’t want me to get away and run free. It was literally impossible for him seeming that my feet were just centimetres from the ground.

‘I’m free’ I thought, until I saw him slowly release a silver hand gun from his belt. He looked at me with his teeth clenched and yelled “I’m going to kill you!” He had the look of something with thousands of demons held inside of him just waiting for the time to come so they can emerge their fury and rage. I heard him shoot the first bullet only to see it hit the stop sign on the other side of the street. He ran after me screaming . I couldn’t and didn’t want to understand what he was saying. ‘What a major freak no wonder this guy was locked up.’

“Help, please somebody help me!” I screamed an edge of terror in my voice. “He’s gonna kill me, somebody help please, help me!” I was screaming so loud but nobody heard me where was everyone. “Help me please” I cried in a quiet whisper when I realized nobody was going to come and help me. I started thinking about death and what it would feel like to die. ‘The pain, or, the peace; Darkness, or, light; Coldness, or, an unknown warmth; A never-ending black hole, or, solid ground; Heaven gates, or, Hells flames’ He fired another shot and I jumped for cover behind a silver Mazda.

“I’m gonna get you !” he screamed with a tone that has no depth. Then out of nowhere he started to sing this crazy remix of twinkle ,twinkle little star. “Twinkle, twinkle little star oh how they’ll wonder where you are, up above on a telephone pole or down below where it’s dark and cold. Twinkle, twinkle little star oh how they’ll wonder where you are!” His voice was so deep and scratchy and he sang with such rage.

Running so fast as I could into the regulars’ stores I took off inside telling the cashier “If a huge man with a mask and leather gloves with spikes comes in here and asks you if I came in , tell him no.” She agreed and I entered into the bathroom and locked the door . I heard the cashier say nope haven’t seen her today. I heard the rattling of the door knob this time not as softly as it was at my house but harder more rage and anger. Then it stopped, all was silent it was rent in twain by a savage screech I closed my eyes praying, hoping this would be over but it wasn’t , I knew he’d find me again somewhere somehow. But when, was the question. My heart was beating so loud that I thought he would hear the thump, thump, thump and begin to fire hoping he would strike me dead.

The author's comments:
i wrote this peice for school in english class

Similar Articles


This article has 8 comments.

on Nov. 19 2010 at 1:39 pm
Damara...C GOLD, Mings Bight, Other
11 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Accept me for who I am, or, watch me as I go"!

awe, thank you my lover, love you candii.... 

on Nov. 17 2010 at 6:58 am
CandiceLauren17 GOLD, Burlington, Other
11 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'll die when it's my time, So let me live my life the way I want to live it :) "

I love this story my darling cousin, It is absolutely Amazing :)

I read it and it made me shiver, But you are so dramatic and that's what I like, Drama <3 ..So great job love, it's an awesome job :)

Vanessa said...
on Sep. 16 2010 at 5:12 pm
Omg i love this this is awesome great job.phenominol... You have talent but fix up the few grammar mistakes that you have

on Sep. 16 2010 at 4:18 pm
Damara...C GOLD, Mings Bight, Other
11 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Accept me for who I am, or, watch me as I go"!

yeah i was thining about doing that actually and i never edited it yet so i think  that is something i should probably have done. but oh well.... thaanks everyone for the feedback....=)

on Sep. 15 2010 at 5:58 pm
Healing_Angel SILVER, Sydney, Other
8 articles 2 photos 513 comments

Favorite Quote:
Live for today, not for tomorrow

Minor grammar errors, but nothing major. Great story line and description! It was a bit confusing sometimes, but you should continue this!

on Sep. 15 2010 at 5:16 pm
wordjunkie BRONZE, Houston, Texas
1 article 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Those who say it can't be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.

hmmm work on the grammar but its a great concept. I think I might have nightemares because of that.

on Sep. 10 2010 at 5:32 pm
Damara...C GOLD, Mings Bight, Other
11 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Accept me for who I am, or, watch me as I go"!

ahhhhhh i understand it's just so confusing but i get it now lol i was thinkin somwhere along those lines when i wrote lay but i still never clued in i desperately need to pay more attention and another thing i never edit my stuff so its kinda fresh.......

paperflowers said...
on Sep. 10 2010 at 3:19 pm
paperflowers, Imaginary, Indiana
0 articles 0 photos 176 comments

You are improving :)

Still grammar problems though. I'm just going to comment on the laying/lying since it's so confusing - it should be "lying on my bed." To lie is to tell an untruth, or to recline/rest. To lay is to set something down, or to lay an egg. Lay is also the past tense of lie. So, "I went to go lie in bed, and I lay there for four hours. Then I lied about seeing a chicken laying eggs on the sewing machine."


MacMillan Books

Aspiring Writer? Take Our Online Course!