The Color of Empty Eyes | Teen Ink

The Color of Empty Eyes

June 11, 2010
By Tomorrow.maybe SILVER, Houston, Texas
Tomorrow.maybe SILVER, Houston, Texas
5 articles 3 photos 32 comments

You had the most beautiful eyes.
Whenever I think of you, I remember your eyes, and I smile.

I remember those days. It was how I’d always dreamed, those days of you and me. We were perfect together.

So many memories.

I remember the music, playing softly in the background as we danced around the drawing room. I remember the way you would hold me, the way you would trace your finger down my neck, look into my eyes, and tell me I was beautiful. And that you loved me. I remember the warmth of your hands when they covered my eyes, the smile on your face when you showed me my wedding gift, our piano. There it was, lovely, smooth, but unpainted. Unfinished, you said. So we could choose our own color of wooden finish to paint it together, you said. To make it our own. Our piano.
I remember that slit of doorway, where you stood with her, your hands on her neck, the same way you place them on mine, one kiss, two kisses, a touch, a whisper.

I remember my heart pounding in protest, all the breath leaving my body, all the warmth leaving the air, leaving me feeling cold, so cold.

I remember, that was when I decided I had to keep you mine. That was when I began to imagine caressing your face, lovingly, with my nails. I’d imagine stroking your cheek, adoring, and then until the blood ran. You were so dear to me, and yet I wanted to crush you. You had to belong to me, and only me. From that moment, everything about you betrayed you. Especially your eyes. Your beautiful eyes. You tried to conceal it, when you laughed and teased, and looked past my shoulder at something that wasn't there. I would ask you, if anything was wrong, though I knew. No, darling, you said. Nothing is wrong, you said. Your treacherous fingers still stroked my face, your tainted mouth still smiled a smile. And I still dreamed your death. I lay nights thinking about it, thinking about you. How I would do it. Where I would put you.
I found the perfect place. I kept it ready.
We sat in the drawing room that night, by the piano, your head in my lap, murmuring, laughing. You soon fell asleep, as still as death, as I knew you would. As the lethium in your wine told me you would.

And that was when I kissed you with my knife.

A sharp, deep kiss. One kiss. Two kisses. Three, four, five, again and again and again until your blood pooled on the floor. Your blood, soaking warm into my dress and painting it a brilliant, beloved red. Your blood, spreading like the smile across my face when I found the perfect shade of finish to paint the piano. Our piano. And I felt complete, for I knew the moment that your open eyes became empty, that you were mine. And of course I had to take a bit of that blood for my own. I even found the perfect little vial to hold it in. I was always one for keepsakes, you knew that. You were always giving me small gifts here and there, that necklace, that little doll, that photograph. That silver locket. That trinket box.

I watched the blood drip into the glass vial, watched it fill slowly, rising, swelling. It was beautiful. Like your eyes. Like the piano will be, once I paint it, the perfect color of dark bloody crimson, sealed under a wooden furnish. There was plenty of the paint. I opened the piano, that opening in the back, just enough for a body to fit, as I knew it would be. As I made sure it would be.

I marveled, how even in death having your head in my lap could give me such a contented feeling inside, how it still overwhelmed me with love. I still had the urge to stroke your hair, trace your jaw line, hold my face close to yours, give you one last quick kiss before setting you inside. There was still a fondness when I arranged your arms to fit, and wrapped your fingers together around the trinket box. I wrote you a letter, in that trinket box. Of why I did this to you. You had a faint smile frozen on your lips, and you looked at me with your beautiful eyes, your beautiful empty eyes. See, darling? I knew you’d understand, that this was for the best. That you could only be mine.

And that was when I closed the back board, hearing it creak and shut with soft finality. Sweet dreams, my love. I am yours. I will always be yours. And you will be mine. Forever. I made sure of that. Whenever I see our piano, when I run a finger across the painted wood, my heart swells, my breath catches, and I remember. That in it, there is you. In more ways than one. And whenever I open that top drawer and take the vial out, when I dip my finger in and watch the blood smudge and settle in the wrinkles and lines, I remember your eyes.
Your beautiful, empty eyes.


The author's comments:
A companion short to 'The Color of Dried Blood.'

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This article has 5 comments.


on Jan. 31 2012 at 9:31 pm
Cheshirekat SILVER, Boise, Idaho
5 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
“A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Oh you can't avoid that; we're all mad here." - The Cheshire Cat

OMGOSH the story is so shocking!!! I mean she painted the piano with the blood!!!! That is so frickin.... twisted and cool. I love this story. I was shocked when I read it. SO FRICKIN AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KonyaB!!! GOLD said...
on Aug. 19 2011 at 4:15 pm
KonyaB!!! GOLD, Edison, New Jersey
14 articles 0 photos 99 comments

CAT!

LOL I don't know if you remember me or not...we used to talk a lot on the forums. :D

Great article, I could visualize and just feel everything you were writing, the details are so vivid.


on Jul. 23 2010 at 5:55 pm
Fredwardness SILVER, Romeo, Michigan
8 articles 6 photos 212 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun" -The Killers (Read My Mind)

"If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there." -George Harrison

I really love your writing...I was right there with your character, I felt all the emotions, and...those emotions were really strong. You are a wonderful writer, I really love this piece of writing. Good Job, Cat.

on Jun. 27 2010 at 6:56 pm
Blue4indigo PLATINUM, Sturbridge, Connecticut
24 articles 0 photos 382 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'd rather be sorry for something that I did than for something I didn't do.
-Red Scott

This is amazing. Both this story and the other one you had written are wonderful. Please write more!!

on Jun. 23 2010 at 9:46 pm
LeeAnn1996 GOLD, Vernon, Alabama
11 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
There's nothing to be afraid of if you face it first.

That was so intriguing.I couldn't stop reading.Please write more.


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