He slit my heels, my legs, up to my thighs. I screamed myself into a lullaby. I was so numb, but the pain rushed over me, so quickly. Tears ran down my cheeks, and blood came out of my cold body. Death was near, but my killer knew just where to cut me to where it made me suffer, not kill me. He took the blade, and forced it into my shoulder. I screamed, for myself, from the pain, for a miracle. I knew a God didn’t exist, if he did, he would have saved me.
He started at the bottom of my ear, and slit. Not deep, but deep enough. He came up to my mouth and cut all the way up to the bottom of my other ear. I felt the blood, it came out of my mouth, and then some went in. He smiled at me, and more tears fell from my eyes. I couldn’t believe someone; a human being could do this to me.
I guess to put me out of my misery; he took the overly sharp blade, put it to my throat, and started slowly sliding it across. He got deeper with each movement.
I closed my eyes, and everything went black. Every ounce of pain had left my body. I felt asleep, but I could still control my thoughts, meaning I wasn’t asleep. I knew I was dead, if I wasn’t I would still feel the cold blade running though my blood. I tried to open my eyes, and all of a sudden I felt pain again, I stopped trying to open them, and the pain went away. I was slipping, holding on to life. Holding on to something painful, I didn’t want to live; living brought back everything that was harmful. Now that I know what dying is like, I wanted to die, more than anything.
I made my mind up; I wasn’t going to try to live. I let my entire body relax, and I still felt nothing. My eyes got heavier, and everything seemed to turn a different color black. I was being lifted, my thoughts, and my mental state were being raised above the world. I didn’t feel a dead weight of body hanging on; I left that in the Earth. I was in Heaven, because to me. Heaven is whatever you want it to be, and I wanted it to be pain free. I didn’t feel any pain, and I now believed in some kind of God.