Gothic introductory Paragraph- no name

September 22, 2009
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I hobbled the fastest I could around the corner, my heart lurching. As I dove through the garbage bags and abandoned furniture by everyone but the mice, I heard the quickly increasing sound of the squeal of tires, a shouting voice, and a barking dog. I strained my ears harder. “You can’t hide from me!” I buried myself deeper under the black garbage sacks, filled with the rejects that nobody wanted or loved. I sure fit in perfectly here, I thought wryly, as something extremely sharp dug into my back through one of the many holes in my t-shirt. I squeezed my eyes shut, it was all I could keep to do from crying in pain. I felt the blood dripping down my back, the drip drop of a faucet that’s handle has long since been broken. I knew this game had went on long enough, every waking moment spent hiding. Hiding from my husband, hiding from my concerned family, hiding from myself. When I opened my eyes, I saw the shadow and heard the heavy footsteps in the entrance of the alley. “I know you’re in here!” He shouted. “Come out, come out wherever you are!” As I heard his deliberate stomp down the alley, I instinctively shrunk into a tighter ball, of course causing the bags to rustle. “Hey!” He shouted. He whirled around, flashing his powerful flashlight in my eyes, and saw the glint of evil that I had come to know in both his dark, drunk, dull eyes but also in his demonic smile. “I’m gonna’ count to ten and if you ain’t out yet I’ll come after you,” his sinister leer only growing bigger and bigger. “One, two….” I quickly felt for the sharp point that I had scraped my back on, grabbing it quickly as the pain exploded in my hand. “Five, six….” I stood up, wincing at the pain in my ankle as well as my back and hand. “Eight, nine….” When he started to turn around, I lunged.

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This article has 14 comments. Post your own now!

IncorrectlyWired said...
Apr. 26, 2011 at 11:47 am
I agree that even though there was no definite resolution, it felt finished. It drops you into the middle of it and ends before the conflict is resolved, but it gives you just enough to peak you interest and to avoid confusion.
jropaqwertbvcw replied...
Jun. 5, 2011 at 3:41 pm
pique, not peak.
princess of darkness replied...
Sept. 30, 2013 at 11:26 am
your a know it all but your right about that
bloodprincess said...
May 27, 2010 at 8:35 am
i love the story you should write more i felt as if i was the person on the story.-.-
madm0e replied...
Nov. 19, 2010 at 10:03 am
Good start. It sounds like a story itself. Maybe you could add X amount of years later...
Forever-darkness said...
Feb. 2, 2010 at 7:55 pm
Please write more on this story and I would very much appreciate it if you could find some time out to read my short story, to hear your thoughts on mine. Thank You. Love the story!
tgir85 said...
Oct. 21, 2009 at 5:29 pm
yes.please write more i think its simply delicious!!! meaning= totally wicked cool
Annika said...
Oct. 7, 2009 at 1:19 pm
omg that was so cool!!! can you please continue? ill be your loyal follower!
yumichris replied...
Oct. 8, 2009 at 1:54 pm
omg= not a word
khulse said...
Sept. 29, 2009 at 2:18 pm
it was good and we want to know more about it. we also want to know who the antigonist is
~awsomeme~ <3 said...
Sept. 29, 2009 at 1:29 pm
that was totaly intence and awasome. What I liked was that is was discriptive. You should continue this story!
Annika replied...
Oct. 7, 2009 at 1:20 pm
you mispelled three words. intence=intense
KiraKira said...
Sept. 28, 2009 at 8:34 pm
Who is he, this mysterious antagonist? It's good, but could you do a bit more? Please?
LaylaViolet said...
Sept. 25, 2009 at 4:37 pm
Hey, hey! It was just getting better! Please continue; that was totally insane. You're "gothically" good. Keep writing. It's some good *spit* :D
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