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Lovely Poison #5

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I hum to myself glancing from my book once in awhile to watch my son play with a spirit. It was much like this peaceful day when I met the boy I would call my son.

A year earlier.

I sit on a bench in front of a park. No one notices me. Reading a book I start to hum a song I heard earlier.


“I like that song.” I hear a small voice say and I look up from my book to see a young boy looking at me.

He can see me? “Me too.” I say softly. “What’s your name?”

“Jackson, I’m eight. What’s your name.”

“People call me Light. Where are your parents?”

“Dead.” He says in a whisper looking down at the ground,
“Are you dead?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “No, I’m alive sadly. People don’t like me because I can see things that they say aren’t there.”

“Then people must be saying that about me because most people can’t see me. Though I’m not dead, I just live in a different world from them. The things and people you see aren’t dead they were just reborn in a different world. Jackson since you have nowhere to go, will you live with me?”

“My parents told me not to trust strangers.”

“I am no stranger to people though because I’m the God of Humans. I live in a mystical place that’s not in this world or the other it’s mine alone and alone am I. I have many mystical creatures that live in my world and they would love to play with someone. I would like to teach you about the world's’ many people are blinded from.”   

“God would like to teach me?”

“I am not God, I am a God. God is a character made by man who was influenced by ancient Gods because of the destruction humans were causing.” I hold my hand out to him. “Would you like to come to my world?”

He grabs my hand and here we are now. Since I am the God of Humans I had to follow human rules and adopt Jackson, so now he is my son, he calls me Mom even though I never told him too. I have taught him many things in the year we have lived together and he has passed my expectations for him.

“Mom, Vanity is here.” Jackson says.

I look up from my book to see Vanity with a smile. “Come on Vanity, Jackson let’s go inside.” Vanity skips to towards me and Jackson picks up the cat with white wings.

Vanity and I go to the library while Jackson goes to probably the creature room. “What’s with the surprise visit Vanity?”

“I wanted to do some business with you.”

“You don’t do business Vanity you do parties. Here I’ll ask you a question and then you can ask me yours so you don’t feel bad. How come the God of Vanity something bad end up in the Upper World?” I say scanning the books behind her.

“I’m not evil myself and like I said I wasn’t supposed to be the God of Vanity. Okay now I won’t feel bad. I need advice the person I’m dating someone and we’re having a falling out. They think I want to use them because of my past dating history but I really do love them.” Vanity looks like she’s on the verge of tears.

“They’re not wrong for worrying and you probably did something to make them think this but think of it like this if their worrying about you they might be scared of falling in love with you because they don’t want to be ditched. Remember sometimes we have to walk through darkness to find the light. Who are you dating?” I get up and cross the room sliding my hands over the worn and leather book covers.

“The God of Pleasure and treasure.”

“No wonder they think you’re using them.” I roll my eyes and pull a book from the bookshelf. I drop it into her lap.

“What is this?” She opens the book and looks at the contexts confused.

“The people you helped in the UnderWorld some of them had relationship problems if you could help them you can help yourself. They had to walk through the darkness till they found their light. Don’t give up I can see in your eyes that you’re in love.”

“Thank you. Oh, I got a letter from Moon and Sun for you.”


Vanity hands me a letter with their crest on it. “What’s that?” Vanity points to a encased golden locket that never wants to open.

“My most prized treasure when I died it was on me and I never lost it. I don’t know why I love it so much but I can never get rid of it even if it doesn’t open.”

I take a letter opener and accidently cut my finger while opening it a drop of blood falls onto the ground. I stand there frozen as black blood leaks from my finger. Pain courses through my body starting from my shoulder. I fall to my knees and the world around me turns black.

“Light! Light!”           

I see a women standing five feet away from me. She wears a black dress and black cape with a hood that she doesn’t wear. A snake draped from her neck.

I remember her. ‘God of Humans I ask of your help. My husband has gotten himself in trouble.’ She’s the one who made me into a shadow.

“How’s your husband doing?”

She smirks. “Don’t have one but I’m glad you remember me. Let me clarify things I am a  God just like you. This is my world like you have yours that humans can’t get too. While I am a God I was once a human and so were you but you’re making me mad just looking at you.”

“Why?” I don’t remember much of my human life.

“I’ll tell you later but I have to do something so you're coming with me. In a blood stained field was a warrior that took the heart the Princess of the Isolated Kingdom.” The room grows color and we sit on a battlefield. A heard of people in the distance fighting and blood falls to the ground along with bodies. A girl in a black dress runs across the battlefield, she trips and a person tries to sink a sword into her body but fails as one is put into them. 

The warrior holds their hand out to the girl and picks her up throwing her over their shoulder. Running in the opposite direction of the war. They run past us with a small conversation.

“Women shouldn’t get involved in war.”
“Aren’t you a woman?”
“Well yeah.”

I look back and their bodies fade into a wall I can’t see. “The praised warrior of the Earth Kingdom. After weeks in a mist of a war I gave you my heart and you gave me your soul because you said your heart belonged to the war for now. Though unlike other love stories it didn’t get a happy ending.” The scenery changes and we end up in a bedroom. 

“I promise I’ll come back, it’s the last battle and we will win. Here I’ll make you a deal if I die I’ll meet you in the next life and if I don’t remember than make me hurt a thousand life times.”

“What if I don’t remember you?”

“Than I’ll make you fall in love with me again. I promise.” The warrior gets up and leaves with a grim expression.

They exchange something I can’t really see. The scenery changes once again and we end up at a battlefield. I spot the warrior and something shines on them, looking closely I see a locket. The same locket I own. The next few things that happen feel like they go to slow.

The warrior kills one person after another, till she’s stabbed in the back. Tears can be seen fall down her face as her body falls to the ground. The locket falls next to her and opens for the last time to reveal a small photo of the princess. The warrior doesn’t frown, doesn’t get mad no the last thing the warrior does is close the locket and mouths.


“Goodbye my love.”  Dying with one last smile to her love.

For the first time I get up and go to the warrior. I stand above her and with one hand take the broken locket from her grasp. “I always did hate war.” I look down at the warrior with features like mine. I remember this place now. I remember this war and I remember my true love. I had two choices in this war die and let the people I love live or live and see the people I love die because their can only be one winner in war but at what cost to be all alone at the end of it. My tears fall onto the palm of my hand covering the dirty locket. 
“I’m sorry love but when you died your memories were erased.”

“Alexandria how are you ever going to learn to be yourself if you don’t stop apologizing for other people’s actions. You’re not a princess anymore and I’m not a warrior we can never go back to this life but we can start a new one.” I hold my hand out behind me and when I feel the presence of another hand the last piece of the puzzle to my soul is now complete.        Ten Days Later           

 I guess I should go visit the God of Wisdom again, now that I know what he means. “Hello Wisdom.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I figured out what you meant now.” I say sitting upon a stack of books.

“Took you long enough, so what’s your true form. Just because I knew you had one doesn’t mean I know what it looks like.”
“Whatever.” I roll my eyes and with one clap my form unravels.

My hair becomes short and a sparkly white. My wings bounce light and colors that the mortal eye can and can’t see. Ripped black pants and a corset of white, gold and silver. My sword of unbreakable metal hangs from my hip with a handle of a black, a black shadow can be seen trapped in the metal. Silk tied to my waist that has no color and every color.


“You could’ve told me I was missing my soul.”

“I could’ve told you a lot of things but I am married to the God of Secrecy. The God of Secrecy barley tells me things like how the God of Loneliness was missing her heart or the promise you made before you died. She could've told me that you are in fact not the God of Humans but the God of the Middle World and the God of Balance and that’s the reason why Joy couldn’t turn into the God of Balance. She could’ve told me a lot of things like why you couldn’t part with the locket or what’s inside or that there was a second locket with you in it but she didn’t. You know why because while I am the God of Wisdom I do not have all the answers because I’m not told all of the answers. Though in all honestly I don’t know what my word would’ve done.”


“You’re right, you don’t know what would’ve happened and while you are the God of Wisdom you must keep everything secret or horrible things are ensure to happen. Well I must be going or the God of Loneliness will become lonely, so ironic.” My body fades and I end up at my kingdom.

I shake my head as I see Vanity with her whip trying to fight Lonely with her scythe. Why are they always trying to teach Jackson to fight? I remember being a warrior giving it all up so the person I love could win. I remember becoming the God of the Middle World and the God of Balance.

I remember becoming a shadow and I will always remember my life as a shadow especially the flashbacks I had of a battlefield and a empty world. I will never forget meeting my lost love. The Gods I have met and the son I have gain. The world I have seen crumble and with my bare hands I have rebuilt over and over again till it finally became stable.

What I will not remember is my regrets, because I have none.

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