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The Heart of a phoenix

It is 5:20 in the morning on a very strange night in the country of star glass. A child is being born. The parents are Julie and Evan Lone heart the rulers of the country. This is their first child and all are excited. Snow is falling and birds the color of scarlet and gold fly round and round circling the palace, where their prince is being born. They of course assume that the child will be a boy for if it is not there will be doom to all. Many years ago a seer foretold a prophecy that if the ruler should ever have a daughter, twenty years after being born that daughter would turn into the planet’s worst villain .

At exactly 5:20 the rulers first child is born and you would think that the first words out of Julie’s mouth would have been something sweet and nice but no what she said was “OH NO!! THIS CHILD HAS DOOMED US ALL!!” Yes the child was a girl. The king looked at his wife’s pale face streaming with tears and knew what he had to do. As he quickly walked to the door his heart ached at what he was about to do, but it just had to be done. He opened the door , walked 20 feet from the palace, wrapped his baby girl in his violet cloak and placed her in a mound of soft snow.
He did not know what would happen to her but maybe just maybe someone might save her.

As the king walked back into the palace one of the birds from above , a phoenix as they are often called, swooped down and by the ends of the violet cloak flew away with the princess .
20 years later…
Golden Rose now lived in fire feathers , a cave where the phoenixes lived. She had grown up with only seeing a human once in her life. She had gold and violet eyes and dressed in a gold and scarlet dress which had been given to her on her fifteenth birthday . Today she was riding in a sledge pulled by the phoenixes Aries and Ayres her foster parents. They were on their way to save the country of Star Glass. the city was being attacked by goblins and the only one who cold help was Rose . At birth when her foster parents had took her to fire feathers they had given her the power to see like a phoenix, hence the violet and gold eyes, and the ability to fight and if killed to be reborn from the ashes of a fire weed flower. Which is what the gems in her crown held. She towered above the city with her gold and scarlet dress and her birth father’s violet cloak billowing around her and her purple gem crown and golden wand. She raised her hand and waved the wand over the city. The wand sparkled once and then twice and in the blink of an eye a storm of golden dust came toward the country. It did not endanger the humans, it simply made the goblins homesick and they all left to find the deepest, darkest place they could find. When all was said and done the people of star glass worshipped the phoenixes and even though no body can be for sure, many think that the hero that they now call heart of a phoenix was and is to this day, Golden Rose, the king’s first child who was suppose to have brought the doom of star glass.
The ironic thing I am sorry to say is 12 years after Golden Rose had saved the city a great villain rose and nearly destroyed star glass. When they had at last caught the villain and pulled off his mask it was Eric!! Her younger brother. I guess someone got the prophecy wrong. When the people realized the wrong they had committed, they searched for heart of a phoenix but like the phoenixes she was never to be found after that rescue. Even though they could never find Heart of a phoenix , the rulers put a violet statue of her in their palace courtyard. Underneath is a plague which has the country’s motto “ everyone has a right to create their own destiny no matter what. Golden Rose has taught us that much."



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This article has 6 comments. Post your own!

MadMouse said...
Jul. 14, 2012 at 9:45 am:

I like the idea of the plot, but I would work on making it smoother with a better flow. 

Keep up the good work! I like your imagination.

 
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VanendraThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 29, 2010 at 12:44 pm:
I loved it ^-^
 
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valkyrie_girl said...
Sept. 24, 2010 at 12:27 pm:
this is really good, you should try to expand it, make it into a full story alot of people would read it and make a personal connection with Golden Rose.
 
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Blue4 said...
Sept. 1, 2010 at 5:23 pm:

The story is great, but you should probably expand, this seems to be one of those stories that need to be longer. The plot is amazing, and the story is an enjoyable read. Great moral.

By the way, can you please read some of my work, rate, and critisize? I'd appreciate it.

 
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Miller M. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Nov. 11, 2009 at 11:50 am:
I enjoyed the general outline of the story, but I think you can work on making it flow smoother.
 
^unshed.tears replied...
May 13, 2010 at 12:01 pm :
i agree. good plot tho. and you could probably add more detail and make it longer, but that's just a suggestion :)
 
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