Hello! If you're reading this then the world probably didn't end. Of course, if the earth did stop all of a sudden, I would never write this down. I'd probably be skewered by a bunch of...never mind, I'm getting ahead of myself and the story.
Ok, a few introductions. My name's Robert and I need your help, badly. A huge plague is spreading and I can't stop it. It's too powerful...too hungry. I'm studying magik now, but I'm not sure even THAT power could influence anything.
What's magik? Good question. Let me tell you, it's not those silly magicians pulling out lifeless rabbits from black hats. No, this is something in a whole new dimension. It's harnessing your life force - the soul - and using it to do things you'd never dream of doing. Know that pop culture myth, "You only use 3 percent of your brain"? Well, it's true, and thankfully, magik solves that little obstacle. Now I can fry pancakes without preparing the dough, freak my sister out by teleporting her make up kit, and mess around with the bullies' locker at school.
There was only ONE thing you can't do. You can not, under any circumstance, harm anyone using magik, not even a mosquito! (Now that is tempting) Of course, I always break rules, and this one wasn't really an exception. Ouch!