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The Life Of A Death Dealer

It all started that one Christmas in 1886. I was enjoying a great breakfast when my little nephew came running in, Sawyer was crying and holding our dog's leather collar. Immediately I sprung up from my seat and went to comfort him.
"Baby boy what's wrong?" I asked as I cradled his small body against me. He wiped his nose and eyes and looked up at me. Before he could even answer I knew what he would say.
"Moto isn't here! I went to give him a blanket and I found his collar on the ground. Aunty, where's Moto??" Sawyer started crying again as he asked the last question. I started to sing to try to calm him down. For a while he stayed cradled against me...



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dolphincrazy226 said...
Nov. 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm
You can definetly tell what happened, even though you didn't say it directly.  That's pretty awesome. I'd like to know more about how you plan to continue this, and how you're going to instigate the whole angel protector thing? Also, it was kinda cliche how you said "it all started in..."  Try and begin it with something that hooks the reader.  Other than that, nice job.  I'd like to see how it turns out:)
 
Giggles15This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Nov. 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm
Thank you I'll definately take that advice :) already submitted all of chapter 1 its pending approval at the moment
 
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