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Dragons, Underwear, and Other Stupid Reptiles

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“Sir, we seem to have a situation.” A gravely voice crackled out of the walky-talky strapped to my waist with a vine.
“I’m a woman!” I screeched into it. “Besides, I have enough things to do right now.” I snapped.
I’m clinging to a cliff side and there’s a waterfall brushing down my back. Why don’t I climb up next to the waterfall? Because then I would be seen by the dragon I’m trying to steal an egg from. She’s a real beauty, she is, but I can’t get close enough to snatch an egg without her seeing me. That’s the problem.
“Uh, Zoë, Beacon woke up.” The voice mumbled.
“Rats!” I cursed.
Beacon is our oldest, crankiest dragon in our park. He’s very needy. He’s two hundred something years old. The only person he lets near him just happens to be me, but I’m on the other side of the planet right now.
“He’s freakin’ out now!”
“Uh, throw the walky-talky to him!” I said.
“Won’t that irritate him even more?”
“Throw the walky-talky!”
“Okay, I guess.”
“Beacon!” I hissed.
“Rwarw?” I heard come through the speaker.
“Hey, big guy!” I said.
“Garber warber rwaw!” Beacon warbled. He sounded much happier now.
“Okay, big guy. Give the box back to…” I started until I forgot the new guy’s name. He just started working in the park. He’s a brilliant vet, but Beacon is afraid of him. He’s the one who was holding the walky-talky.
“Wabble wanga wanga!” Beacon screamed.
“I’m here big guy, I’m here.” I reassured him. I thought I saw a dragon shaped shadow fly past the water.
“Wannnnnnna!” Beacon cried.
“Hush! Beaky-Boy, mommy’s here. Shhht shht sht.” I whispered.
“Rrrrrrrrr?” He asked.
“ROAR!” I nearly fell off of the cliff when the mother dragon landed next to me. She looked at me and I could tell she was thinking “Not you again!”
“Hecicia wowa!” Beacon squealed.
“WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!” The huge female dragon roared, thinking that I had stolen a baby from her.
“Hey hey hey! Easy girl. I don’t have one of your babies. This is my baby!” I held the
walky-talky toward her.
“Echooooo!” Beacon hollered gleefully. The dragon looked at me and her eyebrows seemed to rise ever so slightly. Then, she jumped off the side of the wall and fly up to her nest.
“Ah, phoey!” I cursed. “Now I have to come back a different way.” I began to climb down. The dragon landed on the wall again.
“Org?” She asked. I looked at what she was holding in one of her huge front paws. She was holding a hatching egg!
“Is that yours?” I asked in awe, hoping she understood. She shifted closer to me and held out the egg. “For me!” I said, astonished. She gazed deeply into my eyes and I thought I heard her say ”Take care of my baby,” but her lips never moved. I smiled and took the crackling egg from her out of her arm and placed it into the pouch strapped to my chest.
“Hey, uh, Zoë?” The familiar voice came over the speaker.
“Not now.” I said in a soft voice.
“Uh…” He started but stopped. I looked at the dragon. She nodded at me and her eyes seemed to gleam a little brighter. With a look of respect, she leaped from the wall and flew away.
“You still there?” He asked.
“Yeah! Oh my god! Um, what was your name again?” I sheepishly asked.
“Jeff.” He said in an amused tone.
“That female dragon I was tracking gave me an egg! She flew down and handed it to me!” I half-laughed half-cried.
“That’s great! Beacon calmed down. He’s asleep. Should I contact your ride home to inform them that you’re coming back?” He asked excitedly.
“Yeah, sure.” I grinned. I was going home! The dragon egg began to shake and I heard a sort of peeping noise.
“They’re on their way!” Jeff chimed.
“Cool! The egg is hatching. I’m going to keep the walky-talky on so you can’t talk, but you can record everything. I’m giving you about ten seconds to turn on the recording device. Okay, the egg’s shell is a light gray with quarter sized black spots. Its mother was dark red with a triangular shape about her. It seemed as though she new what gender the baby was because she kept making the ‘female’ motion with her head. She gave the egg to me. Literally flew down and handed it to me. Anyways, the egg weighs twenty-eight pounds. It’s about the size of a basketball. A piece of shell just came off… I can see a few black scales… The baby has crawled out of the egg. She resembles a four month old Bernese mountain dog. She has a graceful ‘look at me’ sort of walk. Her tail is slightly raised. She’s very triangular with a square-ish nose. Her scales are so black; they look like the darkness of a cave on a moonless night. Her irises are black with light grey splotches. Her pupils are a darker shade of black. Oh! Hey there, sweetie.” I laughed as the little dragon curled up on my lap.
“Nafoo!” She squeaked.
“Nafoo?” I giggled.
“Nupnup…” She sighed and fell asleep.
“Hey, Jeff, did you get all that?” I radioed in.
“Loud and clear, Houston.” He joked.
“Mmmm,” I agreed. The truth was, I sort of missed Jeff’s sarcastic comments. And his blonde hair and his dimples, and, well, everything else that goes with Jeff. I really missed Jeff.
“The helicopter is on its way. Is everything okay over there?” He actually sounded worried about me.
“Where?” I asked.
“It should be right over your head right now.” He said. I began to hear the faint chop, chop, chop noises of the helicopter.
“I hear it!” I squealed, waking the baby dragon.
“I can’t wait to see you, er… the baby dragon, I mean.” He stammered. I laughed.
“You know that I miss you right?” I asked.
“Yes, I.. You miss me!” He cried. Jeff accidentally forgot to flick the “talk” button off.
“Who are you talking to?” Another voice barked through the speaker.
“Uh, Zoë Arckamine, sir.” Jeff said.
“You do know that Zoë is my daughter right? You knew that didn’t you, Jeffery. You know something else, boy? I’m damn well proud of my daughter, and the likes of you are not to be affiliated with her!” My father yelled.
When my father was younger, he fought in multiple wars that he never speaks of. He is missing his left hand, which has been replaced with a hook. His name is Commander Archibald Egnodsden. I didn’t even know I had a father until my mom told me two years ago. I was seventeen then. My mother met him on the coasts of Cuba. His ship had been sunk and he was the only survivor. When my mother found him, he was unconscious and was nearly downed to death. That night he woke up, and in his delirium, had mistaken her for his wife. Long story short, I was conceived. Dad prefers it that I call him Com.
“Yes, sir!” Jeff yelped.
“Are you scared boy? Huh, are you scared of the old war veteran? You damn well better be!” I heard the walkie-talkie fall to the concrete floor. The “talk” button finally switched off.
“Com, what are you doing?” I screamed into my walkie-talkie. The helicopter was above me so I could barely here my father’s words.
“You are not to talk to this pathetic excuse of a man.” Com yelled through at me.
“Yes, father…” I whispered back, knowing he would not here me. The line went dead, so I assumed that Com had stepped on the walkie-talkie so that I could not communicate with Jeff.
“Miss, we need you to take the dragon and clear the area!” The loud speaker on the helicopter boomed. I picked up the squirming baby and carried her over to a rocky ledge. When the blades stopped whirring, a small pudgy man stepped out and directed me into the passenger area.
“You will need to place the animal in a cage.” He said.
“No,” I answered.
“Did you here her? She disobeyed a direct order. Knowing who her father is, I think he would appreciate me teaching her some respect.” The fat man reached out and smacked me across the face so hard I fell over onto the floor. The dragon hissed and lashed out with her claws. The inky black talons connected with his face with a blood spraying thwack. He pulled out a gun and aimed it at her.



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