Sherlock Combs and the Mysterious Murder Mystery | Teen Ink

Sherlock Combs and the Mysterious Murder Mystery

January 21, 2011
By andrew21b BRONZE, Frisco, Texas
andrew21b BRONZE, Frisco, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love being purple!" (Patrick Star)


Prologue

My name is Lotson Woods. I am partner to the amazing detective Sherlock Combs.This is the first adventure that we had together as partners, so I suppose I should tell you how we met.
I was a poor man making to little to live by, so I sold my house. I had nowhere to go and not a penny to spend. I had been living as a homeless man for almost a month, until I came upon Sherlock Combs. He saw me on the street and told me to come into his house. Sherlock said that I could stay with him under one condition. I told him that I would do anything. He asked me to be his assistant for his work. When I said yes, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Sherlock Combs had no ordinary job. He was a detective.

Chapter 1: The Murder

“Sherlock! Sherlock wake up! Wake up! Denzel is here and he wants to talk for a spell!” I yelled up the stairs. Denzel was Sherlock’s boss and whenever he came around you could tell something was wrong.
“Okay, okay.” Sherlock said half awake. “Wait a minute. Did you say D-Denzel?”
“Yes I did, Sherlock. Now get down here!”
I heard loud footsteps as Sherlock raced down the staircase. He was in such a rush he was still in his underpants! “Sherlock, put some pants on for goodness sake!” I commanded him.
“Oh, my! I didn’t even notice!” Sherlock said as he grabbed a plaid cloak and ran into the sitting room. “Okay, Denzel, what is it you want to talk about?”
“Sherlock, I’ve got some terrible news. A young woman, very rich, named Shirley has been murdered last night! We need you to go investigate and find the culprit. Do you think you can do this?”
“Lotson, get my bag.” Sherlock commanded.

Chapter 2: The Letter

When we got to the crime scene we could not believe our eyes. The place had been ransacked! Clothes and furniture were strewn all over the place. Couches were cracked, Mirrors shattered, and the house had two gaping holes on the bottom floor walls. The top floor was where Shirley was murdered, so we had to be careful not to fall through the floor as we walked around up there.
“Sherlock,” I said, “I don’t like the looks of this.”
“Nor I, Lotson.”
When we came to Shirley’s room we were baffled. The room was so neat and tidy it was actually sparkling! The only thing unsanitary was the dead body lying on the bed. The strangest thing about the crime scene though was that all Shirley’s jewelry and money were still in place! “Lotson, this is peculiar. Shirley’s safe has not been opened and her jewelry is still in her jewelry box. Whoever did this crime surely did not do it for her riches.”
“Combs, come take a look at this letter.” I said.
“Okay, Lotson.”
This is how the letter read:

Sherlock Combs, I know you are investigating this case and I would advise you to stop. You have no idea what you are getting yourself into. If you are smart (which I know you are) you will stop investigating this case immediately. Remember: You don’t know what you are dealing with.

Signed, The X

“Lotson, where did you find this letter?” Sherlock questioned.
“ I found it right next to the body. There is also a tattered piece of some sort of prison outfit, a test tube, and I found a tiny little hole in the wall right behind the bed frame.” I told Sherlock.
“Come, Lotson. I think I already have a theory about this case.

Chapter 3:The First Theory

“You see, Lotson, I think this tattered piece of a prison outfit belongs to Jack the Slipper. I remember him from one of my other investigations. He was sentenced to life in prison but escaped after a mere 13 minutes. Although very strong, He has no education so I don’t know what he would do with test tubes. The test tubes lead me to another suspect. Dr. Malicious. He hates me for solving a crime he committed and seeks revenge on me so I don’t know why he would kill an Innocent woman. My final suspect is a man named Joshua Jakovice. Also known as The Crazed Creeper. He is known for many crimes and always leaves tiny holes in the walls of the people he strikes. Those are my three suspects yet I have not a clue as of who did it. It seems as though they all play a role in this dastardly deed, or maybe that is just what they want us to think.”

Chapter 4: The Second Message

It was a bright and sunny morning when the second letter appeared at our doorstep. It was written by the same person from the crime scene. This is how it read:

As my sources tell me you are still on this case. Well, since we all know your not going to give up you leave me no choice. Sorry, old friend.

Signed, The X

“Lotson! Find some cover! I fear something very bad is upon us!” Sherlock screeched. And that was when they hit us. At first our house started shaking, then a loud crash knocked me to the ground. I stumbled around for cover and saw Sherlock signaling me under the table. I got up and ran over as fast as I could. Three more blasts knocked me down three more times but I managed to get to safety. There was a loud screeching sound that made my ears feel like they were bleeding but It was not near as bad as what was to come.

Chapter 5: The Bombing

Huge explosions came after the screeching. Our house was getting completely destroyed. We were just lucky enough to be hiding where no bomb went off. Now, I didn’t say we couldn’t feel it though. Our house caught flame and was crackling like logs in a fireplace. I tried to stand but I kept getting pushed back down by the aftershock of every explosion. I called over to Sherlock on the other side of the table but a massive piece of the house had knocked him on the head.
Sherlock was unconscious and I was all alone in a building that was being bombed. I knew it was only a matter of time before the flames caught on the table so I scooped up Sherlock and jumped to the top of the table. I looked toward every exit but flames erupted o every one. Then I spotted it. A window with a glimpse of sunlight. But there was just one problem. I would have to run through a wall of flames and jump down two stories to make it out. I looked again for a way but there were no other escapes. The only good news in this situation was that the bombs had stopped. I decided to face the pain that would come to me and risk it all.

Chapter Six: Leap of Faith

The pain was unbearable. I knew it would be horrible even before I started running but this was just insane. The moment I leaped off the table I could feel the heat closing around me. I almost fell over right there. Almost. I knew I needed to get Sherlock out safely so I kept running. At least he wouldn’t feel anything. That is, until he wakes up. Anyway, I rushed through the flames and crashed through the window. I remember two seconds of free falling then everything went black.
I thought I wouldn’t wake up after that experience,but I did. I had four broken bones, sixteen major burns, most of my hair singed off, and too many bruises to count. The good news was that me and Sherlock were alive. Yes, very much alive. Take that X.

Chapter Seven: The Answer

It had been two months after the incident and Sherlock and I were no closer to the answer than we were before. But on one normal day it hit Sherlock.
“Lotson, Lotson! I know the answer I know the answer!” Sherlock yelled with glee. “It is so simple! How could we not understand? It can’t possibly be just one of the suspects, It has to be all of them!”
“And how can this be?” I asked.
“The beakers could only belong to Dr. Malicious because he is a scientist. I ran some tests over the beakers and the tests show that there was once Komodo poison in them. That is a type of poison that will kill someone in ten seconds. The prison outfit piece can only belong to Jack the Slipper because he escaped jail only 2 weeks before the murder. Finally, the holes in the wall are from The Crazed Creeper. He probably spied on her before the murder to know what time to strike. It is so easy, Lotson! How could we not have seen it sooner? All of our suspects are working together! We did it, Lotson we solved the mystery!” Sherlock seemed happier than I had ever seen him before.
“Um, Sherlock,” I started. “What about the motivation? Why did they do it?”
“Ah, a fine question. They wanted her out of the picture. They stole nothing from her, just ransacked the place, did they not? In The X’s letter he said something bigger is going to happen. They only wanted her eliminated because she might have gotten in the way of the real scheme. Lotson, something bigger is afoot and I am determined to figure it out. Get my bag, we have some more investigating to do.

Chapter Eight: More Investigating

Sherlock and I thought long and hard about what might happen. We decided to go to the police office and check Shirley’s family tree. Once we saw it we both knew exactly why Shirley was murdered. She was related to Sir Christopherson. “Lotson, how could I not have seen this sooner? Sir Christopherson is the richest person in this side of London! Jack, Dr. Malicious, and The Crazed Creeper wanted to murder Shirley so they could scare Sir Christopherson into hiding. Think, Lotson, if you were Christopherson where would you hide?”
“Um, probably at the safest place I knew of.” I answered.
“And were would that be?”
“The castle!”
“Exactly, Lotson. Lets go!” If you don’t know already the castle is where Sir Christopherson goes every summer for vacation. It is very secure and very large. Nobody can break in, or get out, without Christopherson’s permission. At least, that is what we thought.

Chapter Nine: Castle Chaos

The first thing we did when we got to the castle was look for possible break-in spots. The only one we found was a window over 40 feet in the air. “I don’t think anyone will be able to climb that high.” I said. The castle was over eighty feet tall in height, and over a mile in length. It was made of old brown bricks that were sparkly and shiny.
We knocked on the front door and waited. We waited and waited and waited. Finally the door opened and we saw Sir Christopherson. “Sir, I think you might be in terrible danger.” Sherlock said. “You probably already know this but your relative Shirley was murdered. Did she have anything to do with you in the last few weeks?”
“Well, yes. She was supposed to stay here with me this weekend.” Christopherson answered.
“Then that is when our enemies will strike. I think they are going to murder you, Christopherson, and steal your money. They killed Shirley because she might have escaped the castle and told the police. If you don’t mind sir, my partner and I, Lotson, would like to stay here this weekend.”
When Sherlock said that, I do not think he knew what he was getting us in to. What happened was something we never could have predicted.

Chapter Ten: A Surprise

Tonight was the night. We were sure of it. They would strike tonight. Suddenly we heard a thud at the door. “Christopherson, get to safety.” Sherlock said. Thud! Thud! Thud! Crash! The door flew down and the person who was standing over it was none other than...
“Denzel?” We Shrieked in unison.

Chapter Eleven: The Battle

“Yeah, its me all right. You should have heeded my warning, Combs.” Denzel said.
“Hey, what about me?” I asked. “You do know I’m here, right?”
“Shut it, Lotson, this is the battle between me and Denzel. You can go keep Christopherson safe, okay?” Sherlock said.
“Fine, fine.” I returned.
“Okay, now that that is settled, lets get in on!” Sherlock made the first move as I watched through a crack in Christopherson’s door. He threw a punch that was easily blocked by Denzel. Then Denzel swept Sherlock out from under his feet with a roundhouse kick. Denzel leaped on Sherlock and pinned him down. He then pulled a knife out of his pocket and put it to Sherlock’s throat.
“Sherlock, Sherlock, Sherlock. Before I kill you I’m gonna ask you one simple question. Why did you stay on this case? The letters I sent you told you that you could not handle this. Your house was bombed, for Pete’s sake! You knew your life was peril, why did you still try and solve this?” Denzel questioned.

“Because, Denzel, Its my job.” Sherlock answered.

I was expecting Sherlock to say something witty but apparently he had no comeback. That's strange, I thought, he always has a comeback.

“Your job? You would risk your life for your job? No matter, back to the task at hand. Sorry, Combs. It is over!” I couldn't just sit there and watch this. I opened the door and burst out. I jumped in the way of the knife just as Denzel lunged it at Sherlock. I felt a stabbing pain but I knew I had to finish what I started. I smacked Denzel across the face thirteen times and tackled him to the ground. The pain was growing worse but I stood strong. Denzel was fighting back, but he was throwing wild punches that barely hit me. After around three minutes of fighting I delivered the final blow. Denzel had been defeated.

Chapter Twelve: Lotson and Denzel in the Hospital

When I was fighting I had no idea what the stabbing pain was. Well, I figured it out about two seconds after the fight. The knife had been stabbed into me when I tackled Denzel. Sherlock immediately rushed both me and Denzel to the hospital.

A few days later when I was healed Sherlock and I had some questions to ask. We went into Denzel’s hospital room and pulled up two chairs. “Why would you do it, Denzel?” Sherlock asked.
“Because, I needed the money. I don’t make enough as your boss. I mean, I only make enough to keep food on the table. That doesn’t include paying for the house, clothes, sleeping space, or the kids. I have three kids, you know. This was my only option. I framed your worst enemy’s to lead you off track. I bombed your house because I knew you would figure out the case sooner or later. I thought I killed you in the bombing, but I guess not. You ruined me, Sherlock and Lotson, Ruined Me! I will get you back, And this I swear. So you enjoy the next few weeks, but when I get out of jail you will pay! You will pay! I swear it! Swear it!”
That was the last we heard of Denzel when we walked out of the room. Well, Lotson, as our first real case together I can honestly say that you did very well.

Chapter Thirteen: The End?

Sherlock and I lived happy lives after that mystery. It had been three years since and we thought we were done with Denzel for good. That is, until we read in the paper that he had escaped prison. “Lotson, we have a new mystery on our hands.”


The author's comments:
This is a funny mystery story I wrote for my G.T. class at school. I have hopes of getting it published as a short story.

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 12 comments.


Rohan said...
on Feb. 14 2011 at 6:10 pm
You may not know me, but I got here because of Mrs. W's site and I was pretty astonished by the story. Good job getting published.

Donna said...
on Feb. 12 2011 at 10:15 am
Great job Andrew, keep up the good work!

Tdub said...
on Feb. 7 2011 at 6:53 pm
Great story Andrew, thats so cool!!!

Caleb N. said...
on Feb. 1 2011 at 9:07 pm
Hey whats up? I go to school with u. Great story! So what if people think it's a rip-off of sherlock holmes. Don't listen to them cause they probably don't know what they're talking about. I'll make sure to congratulate u in the hallway at school! Cya

carlson said...
on Feb. 1 2011 at 3:28 pm
Andrew, you are quite the writer.  You came up with great names--and a great plot---you got me!  I am very proud of you using your GOD given talents.  Love, A.Sue

on Feb. 1 2011 at 9:04 am
andrew21b BRONZE, Frisco, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love being purple!" (Patrick Star)

Thank you Mrs. T!

Ruthie said...
on Jan. 31 2011 at 5:34 pm
Good for you, Andrew.  Your grandmother would be proud of you. I'm looking forward to your future writings.

Mrs. T said...
on Jan. 25 2011 at 9:59 am
Maxwell, I'm sure you would benefit other writers better with more constructive comments.  Beating up on a fellow writer verbally is disheartening, and, after reading this story, unwarranted.  This student did a good job with imagery, creating a story arc, and voice.  Also, if you're going to critique a writer - use proper grammar so that they will respect your insights.  Thank you, and good luck to you as a writer.

MrsW said...
on Jan. 24 2011 at 8:26 am
I enjoyed this! Keep reading and writing. Classic literature is a great example to use when becoming an author.

joey said...
on Jan. 23 2011 at 9:27 pm
Give the kid a break.  I think it is a great story.  Maybe this is his first attept at writing.  He used a lot of imagination and great visual wording

on Jan. 23 2011 at 7:12 pm
andrew21b BRONZE, Frisco, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love being purple!" (Patrick Star)

Well, its supposed to be alot like sherlock holmes. btw im checking yers out now.

on Jan. 23 2011 at 10:57 am
lswithspunk BRONZE, Opheim, Montana
3 articles 0 photos 18 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"why take life seriously, none of us make it out alive anyway\"
\"censorship is like telling a man he cant have a steak because a baby cant chew it\"--Mark Twain

It's alright but it kind of seems like your copying sherlock holmes... a lot. But it's still good. Please check mine out