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Frailty

As I sit here in the dark waiting for the sun to rise, I can feel my reason and sanity fading away. The night is still and soundless, but in the minds of us all sounds of confusion ring. Will we fall as all the others have? Or shall we extinguish our foe and claim victory? Only one thing is certain, and that is that no one will remain the same. When I took my first life in the call of duty, I felt as if I gave up everything that I was.

Since the very beginning people of this world have fought mindless wars, and for nothing more than the right to be called "king". Since the war between us and "D" began, nothing but lives, friendship, and love have been destroyed. Josrean, my dearest friend, was pit against her family in the struggle to keep this nation safe, and in her darkest hour she killed her very own father. I felt what was left of humanity shatter that day, when the calls of war claim the life of those dearest to us. I saw her kneel down and kiss the corpse, then she looked at me, but the blank stare told me she was not the same anymore.

War has tainted our souls with hatred that has already lingered there for ages. As all the men fight for their loved ones, for valor, or for their home and country, they all overlook that fact that they are dying inside. Even I myself, once a beacon of happiness and joy, have lost the spark that has kept me going through the shadows of this world. Only a hollow shell of what I once was, I now fight for a cause that I cannot recall. Just as the blades of a fan move round and round, the hatred of man leads to the same result.

I can hear the men asking the question, “Will God save us? Would he leave us to suffer as the mindless followers of evil?” Mankind has spoken the same line for all of his existence, and in our minds we wonder what secrets and power can be delved. Why would a mother be born with the ability to slew her own child? I cannot help but accept that this evil is spreading in my heart, as well as the rest of all that’s remaining of my kin.

Evil lies within the soul of us all, and even the strongest can fall. This darkness hidden in man will never disappear. Even in the times of prosperity, brother and sisters were fighting, countries were committing pointless genocide, and only for the thrill to see you enemies blood before you feet and on their hands. Even I, a fighter for the good things of this world, will never be free of these “desires” to see my enemies dead before my feet. Even as I was cleaning the blood from my cloths, I felt no regrets.

God suffered on the cross so we would never have to burn in the everlasting fires of hell, but he did not cure mans avarice for power. The Garden of Eden was the first test of will and control, and we failed. It was in this moment, that all hope for man was lost. The serpent has now spread its poisonous words to all reaches of man’s heart, and now our race is on the break of destruction. I do not expect, nor would accept, any of God’s mercy. I do not deserve it, and neither do any of my brethren. As the troops and I sit and wait for the final stroke of the sword and hammer, we have no one to blame but ourselves. God made us with a never ending lust for power, but what he did give us is what sealed our fate. Born with a choice, man tainted his birthright.





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