Drowning in the Cold

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Sighing, I fell into the dream world, Alexander's words lulling me to sleep. But something was bothering me, poking at the edge of consciousness and I couldn't place what it was. Then the dream started.

Everything is so white, so empty. I have to be dead. I sit up and see I am dressed in a long white gown like the ones that the Ancients wore. I shiver as ice began spreading across everything. And so, freezing cold, I stood, wandering along in the ice covered emptiness. Suddenly I saw a thick black lake amid the nothingness, sprinkled with snow crystals that had fallen in and I walked towards it. I felt compelled to go to it and when I stepped out onto its surface, it felt hard, almost like shiny black glass. But then, as I reached the middle it became like quicksand, the water not letting me go. I struggle, knowing it's useless. And I go under. I thrash, seeing the white light filter in from above. Ice crystals swirl around mem glinting like a natural glitter as I float there, submersed in black water and it's eerily beautiful. I start to drown. I choke and scream, thrashing, trying to get to the surface but I can't reach it. Ice covers the surface and I'm trapped. Trapped in the winter darkness.

I beat upon the ice and it won’t break no matter how hard I hit. And then I saw Alexander standing at the edge of the lake, clothed in completely white. I knew then that this couldn't be real since Alexander never wore white. He coudn't see me pounding on the white frosty ice and I was screaming as much as I could underwater.But then in a sparkle of hope he snaps to attention. One second he was staring off into the distance and the next he was staring right at me. I was starting to loose air and I was quickly loosing muscle control because of the temperature. He had better hurry. I saw him scan the ice and I knew that he was trying to find a way to get at me. I was starting to loose consciousness and my mind wasn’t quite comprehending much of anything besides the worry on his face.

All I knew was that someone was coming towards me. I am so cold and I know my lips had blue by now. I started to sink away from the surface and my eyes wanted to flicker closed. So heavy, so very heavy. It was as if there was a gigantic unseen pressure pushing down on my eyelids and finally I let them close. I caught a glimpse of Alexander so close and yet so far away. He was watching me sink away, loosing my consciousness quickly. He couldn’t get to me. But I guess that’s okay. Maybe I want to die young. I heard dim cracking noises but everything was overpowered by the deadly silence of the water pressing in on my ears, leaving me alone. I'm so close to death and it's so peaceful. "I love you...," I heard Alexander say, and the ice shattered, breaking apart to a pale hand reaching down to grab mine.

And then as the hand took hold of mine, the peacefulness suddenly exploded, leaving me awake and gasping for air as I sit straight up. My skin is numb with cold but inside my body hurt. And with all of that I started crying.





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