The Portal

August 24, 2010
By fireeyedgirl SILVER, Dulles, Virginia
fireeyedgirl SILVER, Dulles, Virginia
7 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I think that most of us, anyway, read these stories that we know are not "true" because we're hungry for another kind of truth: the mythic truth about human nature in general, the particular truth about those life-communities that define our own identity, and the most specific truth of all: our own self-story. Fiction, because it is not about someone who lived in the real world, always has the possibility of being about oneself. "
— Orson Scott Card


Keith and Bran waded slowly through the thick underbrush of the Green Forest. Their dog bounded ahead, seemingly unaffected by the tangled scrub. Despite the difficult going the boys walked confidently as though they had gone this way many times before. Ancient oaks towered over them majestically. Everything in the forest cast looming shadows in the twilight. Strange figures lurked in the corner of their eyes. The brothers walked on. Keith whistled a jaunty tune.

“Keith,” Bran hissed, “stop that whistling! You'll summon evil spirits.”

“Don't be such a baby, Bran. There's no such thing as spirits.” Despite his scoffing Keith went quiet. The brothers walked on.

After several minutes Bran piped up again saying, “Llywelyn believes in spirits and he's not a baby. He's the bravest man I know!”

Keith sighed, exasperated. “Llywelyn isn't right in his mind. He's been different since the Normans cut off his hand.”

“Still... He's not the only one either, lots of people have seen spirits!”

“Name one person who's actually seen a spirit”

“What about Bregus? She's seen loads of that kind of stuff!”

Keith snorted loudly, startling the ravens that had begun to roost in the shadowy treetops. “Name one sane person who's seen a ghost.”

The brothers walked on.

“Olwydd!” Bran shouted, shattering the silence. “He was right in front of us! Where could he have gone? Olwydd!”

“He's probably just chasing a squirrel. Look, there he is now, by that hollow tree, see?” Keith and Bran hurried forward; something about the cavernous hole in the tree seemed to disturb their normally cheerful dog. “What have you found Olwydd? Let's take a look.”

The huge hole could have fit at least three bears in it comfortably, four at a squeeze. The two small boys and largish wolf hound didn't have to think twice about clambering in.

Sunlight left them momentarily blinded. They blinked and looked around in time to see a large hole shimmer and disappear. The Green Forest had vanished as had the night. They stood on a strange road of some sort, edged with thick, wooden beams. An ear splitting shriek broke through the quiet afternoon and the brothers leapt off the track just in time to avoid a monstrous beast with steam billowing out it's nostrils.

After a moment Bran said, somewhat triumphantly, “See? I told you not to whistle!”

Keith opened his mouth to protest when a strange voice boomed out from behind them. “Aye!” it called ambiguously.


The author's comments:
This is an assignment for an online writing course I'm taking. Please review.

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This article has 2 comments.


on Sep. 1 2010 at 12:42 pm
fireeyedgirl SILVER, Dulles, Virginia
7 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I think that most of us, anyway, read these stories that we know are not "true" because we're hungry for another kind of truth: the mythic truth about human nature in general, the particular truth about those life-communities that define our own identity, and the most specific truth of all: our own self-story. Fiction, because it is not about someone who lived in the real world, always has the possibility of being about oneself. "
— Orson Scott Card

You are the best person ever! Do you realize you're the non family member to review my work? I'm so happy! Now I'm all inspired to continue this. I'll be sure to read your story soon.

Again, thanks so so much for reviewing, it means a lot to me!


on Aug. 27 2010 at 6:57 am
NeverCaredForKool-Aid GOLD, Elkridge, Maryland
13 articles 0 photos 531 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't believe in hell but I believe in my parent's couch-- Watsky

This could be a great beginning to a story!  Are you going to continue?  I loved the relationship between the two brothers.  And you probably scored so major points in my opinion just for haveing theit dog be a wolf hound.  I saw absolutley not grammar or spelling mistakes, so kudos for that!

I think that this could be a really great story.

Can you check out my story, "Encounter"?



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