It Can't Be Real

March 26, 2010
By Anonymous

Just beyond the edge of the woods a house is set between three large pine trees. It's a humble house with small windows and two gardens on each side of the doorway. It has multicolored Jolly Ranchers creating the walkway which leads up to a large dark chocolate door. Surprisingly the doorbell is not made out of candy, but instead it's a button; a red plastic button about the size of a pea which caught the sunlight and glistened brightly. I stood before the house in the mid summer heat, wondering why the intricate designs on the chocolate door hadn't melted yet.

I pushed on the red button, and waited. Nothing happened. Hmm that's interesting. I wonder if it even works. I sighed to myself and peered over to the nearest window hoping to get a view of something...anything. Yet I saw nothing due to the light blue curtains which blocked my view. I had stumbled upon this unimaginable house, and I wasn't going to leave until I had fully explored.

I scanned the house with my eyes searching for an entrance. It's slightly ridiculous really; the outside of the house is made of ginger bread and Pixie Sticks form the roof top. Gum drops create a chimney, and Candy Canes of all colors and sizes line the walkway giving off light during the long hours of the night. Swedish fish and Sour Patch chewys make a line holding the garden in place.

I looked to the trees expecting them to be made out of Lollipops, but found they were not. They were simply Evergreen Pine trees. I sighed again somewhat disappointed and stepped over the flower bed sprinkled with rainbow colored Skittles.

A hard object came flying down upon my head causing me to spin around in panic. I felt my heart beat quicken, and my eyes darted left and right scanning my surroundings one more time. Thump. Another one fell causing me to turn again and jump. Peering down I saw what had created the noises. Peanut M&M's were falling from the pine trees, as pine cones, or egg corns would fall. I smiled and rubbed the sore spot on my head feeling for a bump.

Still determined to explore, I headed to the back of the house. Ooo, yummy! I gasped, and reached for the large, colorful, Lollipop which stuck out of the ground at a slight angle. She was watching me through the window in the chocolate door yet I had no idea. It creaked and opened, causing me to freeze mid reach.

“So do you like the new house? She asked, ending her question with a high pitched squeak. I turned my head abruptly and saw it was my mother standing under the chocolate doorway, hands on her hips, smiling like a Stepford Wife.

“Mom?” I squinted my eyes, as if that would help my brain capture what was happening. She was wearing pastel colors and an apron that said “Best cook.” The apron too, was decorated with flowers in pastel colors. Ew I thought.

“I bought it just a few weeks ago. I'm so glad you were able to come and visit. Come in, I'll show you around.” She turned around sharply and disappeared into the house with her pony tail swishing back and forth like a Childs.

This was not my mother... It couldn't be. I rubbed the sore spot on my head. I know she likes candy, but she hates cooking, nor would she ever wear pastels! Never the less, I shrugged my shoulders and walked toward the candy house confused.

Inside the house it smelled like apple pie that was far too sweet. It was overpowering, and made my stomach feel queasy. “MOM.” I yelled, scanning the walls with my eyes. She had disappeared. I was amazed by seeing that the furniture was made out of candy too. “Must get sticky in the heat.” I mumbled.

“Not really.” She chirped. I turned around and saw she was cutting a slice of pie. “ I was just making your bed, so whenever you want to...”

Her voice drowned out as background noise, as I stared at her feet. I rubbed my eyes vigorously not believing what I was seeing. Her shoes had turned into Tootsie rolls. I looked her up and down, not caring that my mouth was hanging open.

“-and then maybe we can...” she continued blabbing not realizing she was turning into candy herself! Suddenly I felt dizzy. Maybe it was all the candy, or that overpowering smell of pie…

“It's time to wake up!” She shouted with that sing-songy voice. It was the type of voice you don't want to hear first thing in the morning. I groaned and squeezed my eyes tightly together hoping this would help me fall back asleep. I rubbed my head feeling a bump on the top, and suddenly remembered my dream. It can't be just a dream. I thought; but it had to be a dream. I sat up and dragged myself out of the bed. “That was weird.” I mumbled, still rubbing the sore spot on the top of my head.

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