The Faery Child- Part 1

February 15, 2010
The wind hurried through the streets, picking up leaves as it went. It wandered into the woods where the little river gushed by. For the people living in that secluded town, the woods were simply were, like the flies buzzing around the honey jar. It would have been all for the better then, that none knew of the secret hidden within the leafy boughs.


“It's not fair!”

“Ellie, please, calm down. Look on the bright side, at least you don't have to share a room with your brother anymore-”

“I don't care! Why did you have to move us away from daddy? I want to go back home!”

“How many times do I have to tell you Ellie? Your father and I are divorced, and now this is our home.”

Ella sniffed, ignored the comforting arm her mom extended, spun on her heels and left the kitchen, careful to slam the door. She maneuvered through the boxes stacked haphazardly in the corridor and open the door.

Instead of the busy, bustling city that usually greeted her, all she saw was an never ending field of green and gold. Her mother had wanted to move back to her childhood home, and she had even managed to find a place near grandma and grandpa. She had smiled cheerfully then, packing the boxes.

“It's so beautiful in the country,” she said “I used to wake up to hear birds singing.”

Bird singing... right! thought Ella. She had woken to the sounds which resembled an overly confident rooster boasting to a hen. I hate it here. She thought. It was not the same as in the city, where the tall skyscrapers had sheltered the streets below. Here, the clouds and the grass stretched for miles around, giving the feeling of complete isolation.

She got up, and lost in her own miserable thoughts, wandered around the neighborhood. It was only when the branch of a pine brushed against her shoulder did she look up to see, that she had walked into the heart of the forest.

“Are you lost?”

She looked up, and gave a startled yelp. Sitting on the branch over head, his head cocked to one side like a sparrow, was an elf!

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This article has 7 comments. Post your own now!

AnnonymousFate said...
Mar. 21, 2010 at 9:29 am
Oh my goodness. I was so upset when it ended and I couldn't read more. The beginning is a little choppy and could be cleaned up a bit, but other than that it's amazing. I see some serious potential. Please check some of my stuff out as well. Thanks.
Celair_Phoenix replied...
Mar. 27, 2010 at 9:22 am
part 2 is up if you would like to read it
Toru_no_Tenshi said...
Mar. 20, 2010 at 10:52 pm
Nice story, the plot is vaguely there but I think that's clever on your part, to intrigue readers' imagination. You always write better than me on these descriptive types...:D
PaperPlanes said...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 6:14 pm
Hey, nice story! I thought it was pretty good overall. Just make sure you watch out for some convention errors. I thought a few words were also missing. If there's anything you might want to consider doing next time, I think it would be nice if you described more in depth of how the character feels about moving away, other than the obvious fact she hates her new home. This way, it'll be easier for readers to develop a sort of connection with the main character. All in all, wonderful st... (more »)
love2love17 said...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 3:58 pm
Very clever writing that captures the reader's attention! Watch for grammar, but overall very great!
BaiLiHua This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 6:13 am
I have become interested in thee characters ... and the writing is very solid. Great job.
Celair_Phoenix replied...
Feb. 24, 2010 at 2:18 am
Thanks! :) Yeah I know... I did this when I was drunk on caffeine and up late. (New Years) but I could see what you guys mean by 'watch for grammar issues.
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