Ernie's Little Magic Shop

November 12, 2009
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It all began when an angry woman enters Ernie’s Magic Shop. “Excuse me young man, but I need to talk to your manager immediately.” An angered woman asks. She’s carrying a large snoring duffel bag. “What makes you think I’m not him?” I say while buffing my chest out. “Don’t get smart with me; you are clearly just a young boy.” “I already have something to complain about; don’t make me add you to that list.” She fires back. “Yes, mamm, the manager will be right with you.” I say with a smile as I move my wand in a circular motion. The woman looks like she is about to blow up with anger as she watches the young boy she just spoke to, turn into a grown man. “You tricked me!” “Now I’m really mad, I came into this dumb magic shop to return some stupid vacpig my husband bought, and I get humiliated by some good for nothing magic man!” She yells. The costumers in the store stare. I plug my ears back up, for those words were charmed and went as fast out as they did in. They went right through me and I heard nothing. “I’m sorry mamm, I missed that, but why is your bag snoring?” “It’s a bit distracting don’t you think?” I ask with a chuckle. “That’s what the problem is!” She says as she struggles to lift the big bag to the table, unzipping in to reveal a fat pink snoring vacuum pig. “Didn’t you read the manual?” I ask. “What manual, it’s a pig!” she screams. “Mamm, it’s a vacuum pig. There’s a big difference between a pig and a vacuum pig. And a vacuum pig needs to eat 3 silver apples daily to keep its digestive system regular and to keep it energized.” I say as seriously as I can. “It is sucking up all your messes for goodness sakes.” I point out. “Well then, where could I find some of these silver apples?” “I’ve never heard of them in my life!” She says with a dimming angered tone. “There should be some in isle 4, but if there aren’t enough there, I can go get some from the back room.” I offer politely although a devious plan is brewing in my head. “Yes, yes, I will take all of them.” “Now off you go!” She directs. “Oh, I will get those apples, your majesty.” I say under my breath with a grin.

As I get to the back room, I search for the silver apples. “I’ve really got to clean up in here.” I say to myself. After about 20 minutes of searching, I finally found them. Boy did those apples look yummy. But with a wave of my hand, I turned all 32 apples into one ugly green lizard monkey. I even charmed it, so that it will fall in love with the first woman it sees. I cover the lizard monkey with a sleepy blanket to keep it calm for a couple of hours. Then, SURPRISE!! I walk out to find the woman tapping her fingers on the table impatiently. “Here you go.” I say as I handed her the crate. “It’s about time.” She says. “The money is on the table.” She says as she hurries out the door. People should know not to behave like that in a Magic Shop. It’s just a prank waiting to happen. I’m pulled out of my thoughts as a tall hairy man approaches me. “May I help you?” I ask. “Yes, are you Ernie Mandle?” he asks in a thick British accent. “Yes, yes I am.” I mimic in my best British accent. “Well then, I wouldn’t be mimicking the person about to close your little shop.” “If anything, you should be at my feet.” He says with a grin. “Why?” “I don’t want to smell your feet!” I say, as my voice gets louder. “Haha, you are quite humorous.” “You switch your magic career to comedy.” He guffawed. “Honestly sir, this really isn’t a laughing matter.” I say angrily. “Some stranger walks into my shop, telling me he’s going to close it!” I say trying not to scream. “And you tell me, I’m humorous?” I say. “Why don’t you explain all of this to me right now?” I direct. “I’d be happy to.” He says smugly. “Your, um, charming, little magic toy store, hasn’t been getting a lot of positive reviews on the service.” “It seems to me, that you are just plain rude.” “And unless you can change that soon, your shop has just been a waste of space.” “Nobody wants to come in.” “So, you have 48 hours before foreclosure.” He informs. The word foreclosure echoes in my head. I am at a loss for words. “Well, I have to run, but here is my card if you have any questions.” He says, handing me the card. I take it. But the big question is, how am I, going to keep my shop from closing. I’ve only got 48 hours!

It took me a while to come up with an idea. But then it hit me. Literally, it hit me right in the face. As I was walking home that night, a flyer flew straight at me. It read, “Magic Fun House for Sale!” “Needs to be sold immediately!” This would solve all of my problems. I would buy this fun house and sell my old shop. When I move in, I will make it the ultimate hangout. I could prank people as a profession. Everyone likes a little joke now and again. Plus, I can use magic! With time, the Magic Fun House will become super popular! Not to mention I would make tons of money!! Then, that snobby foreclosure guy would be begging me to come back with all my business. I wake up out of my dream and run home as fast as I can with that flyer. I dial the number shown speedy quick. The owner and I talk for a couple hours and then it was settled. I could move in by morning. I couldn’t wait, so much to do!!! Morning seemed to have come as slowly as possible and I still needed to pack. But with a wave of my wand, I packed everything up and sent it to the moving van out front. I say goodbye to my little old shop and off I go.

Today………..

I have been working my magic fun house for 3 years now. Business couldn’t have been better. Like I predicted, the man who foreclosed my first shop, wanted me to move back with all my customers. I declined. I really enjoyed my location and all the people enjoyed my entertainment. Who would think people would pay to be pranked. Halloween came around and instead of funny pranks; I decided to try something different and do more creepy and scary stuff. It seemed more people enjoyed being scared out of their pants then laughing. So, the title of my business changed from Magic Fun House to Halloween Horror Nights. More teens began to come and I hired actors to play my scary characters. They would be the ones to chase and scare the customers. Everything seemed to have worked out, and I couldn’t have been happier.



The End.





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