A Whisper of Hope

August 12, 2009
I ran through the forest, never getting tired never slowing down. I ran until it began to snow and then only then did I stopped. The wet frozen flakes hit against my face. They melted slowly and the water ran down my face in the place of tears. I crawled into a bush and hid myself away from the world. I couldn't handle my past, I couldn't handle my future, and I certainly couldn't handle my present. First I attacked a guy during lunch, breaking his leg and his nose, then I was suspended. Again. The guy though had been bothering me all year, starting rumors, turning everyone against me, and finally making me an outcast. Then my mom finally decided to come back into my life, but it was after my dad died of an unseen disease.
I still can't wrap my head around the fact that he's gone, it's like I'm in a nightmare one that I'll never wake up from. My mom had left us seven years earlier and decided to come back when it was time for legal rights she came back in a heartbeat. I can't stand her either. we are completely different. She likes pink pretty clothes, and I like jeans and sweatshirts. She wanted me to go into beauty pageants and home economics, and I wanted to go into a creative writing class and join the basketball team. Her idea of good bonding time is going to the mall and trying on make up. My idea of that is, well you get the idea.
So finally I put my foot down and told her that if she was going to be my mom she'd have to learn to except me as I am. Well she couldn't really handle having such a 'rebellious' daughter. She's such a freak it makes me sick. So she decided to give up custody rights. Well I wasn't going to sit back and let her give me to some strangers. No way.
I could of hid in that bush forever, but then I got cold. I could have started running again, but where am I running to? I could have stayed there and freeze, but am I done living? I could go back to my mom, but where would I go when she realizes I'm back? I don't belong anywhere. Have you ever felt this way? Or been in this situation? No where to go? No one to help you?
But someone can help you. a voice whispered in my head
"No I have no one," I was surprised I said it out loud
Just follow my voice I can help you. It whispered again
"But your in my head,"
Am I?
I crawled out of the bush. I didn't know what that meant so I decided to walk around the woods again. Maybe I wasn't crazy, maybe someone really was looking for me.
Yes we are looking for you, Sabella come to us.
"Where are you?"
Over here, over here over here!
I felt surrounded, too many voices in my head.
"Get out of my head!" I yelled
But you found us. The voice whispered
"Where are you? What do you want?"
A woman appeared in the clearing, a few people follow.
You don't know who you are do you?





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