Three Little Boys

June 1, 2009
By whammy BRONZE, Place, Illinois
whammy BRONZE, Place, Illinois
3 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Three little boys lie in a row,
none of them the same.
Three little boys stories untold,
plenty of people to blame.
Three little boys lives unfold,
everythings going to change.

Boy One

Cylis is eleven today and during supper he came home for the first time in two months. Mr. Jay had given him a blanket to dry off but water seeped through anyways and stained the floor. For one hour our family was whole again, but all the promises in our hearts couldn’t make him stay. My little brother came back the same way he left; a memory.

His funeral was on July 4th and for the first time I watched the fireworks alone. The glittering lights danced above me and try as they might to keep my attention, all i could hear was Cylis.
“Missy did you see how big that one got? Did you? I like that one the best....BOOM...Missy Missy look! I change my mind, that one is my favorite!” I whispered back into the sky, “Yeah Cylis, I saw it. I like that one best too.”


Two Years Later

I’m a sister of a cold case. Nobody told me there was an expiration date on uncovering the truth. An apology for a service unprovided. A paycheck still rewarded to an unsuccessful attempt at justice. How can one find closure with a case unsolved?

Those who serve, pride themselves on their dedication towards the stop of corruption and become angered towards societies complaints. Stating there is simply not enough time and too many cases to solve them all. But, it was them who choose their profession. Those who seek help did not choose to be wronged.

I’m scared too much time will pass and Cylis will be forgotten. Neighbors will move away. Strangers will fill the houses and my little brother will become just another body in the grave yard.




Boy Two

When you have children, not even in your wildest dreams do you expect them to die before you. Sammy did though. He was my baby boy. And I let him down.

The judge ruled in favor of Reggie’s plea for visitation of Sammy under and agreement that Reggie would find and keep a steady job. It took every once of will power I had to let Reggie take Sammy out of my arms. Combing my fingers through his hair I told him one more time I’d right back before I finally turned away.

I was only gone a few hours to run some errands, but it turns out thats all Reggie needed. It was noon when I ventured back up the apartment stairs. He lived on the third floor, in apartment 15C,a place where even God keeps his back turned.

I heard it from the stairwell. A gun shot. Two stairs at a time, then three stairs at a time until i reached the top. No answer at his door.

My the time the police got there my fists were stained with blood. Somebody grabbed me and held me away as they kicked the door in. Time stopped. My lungs begged for air but my body refused to breath. All I could see where badges until my eyes refused to see anything.

Two Years Later

If I can’t have him, no one can. Love Reggie. Thats all I have left. People thanked God when the Reggie was found guilty. Not me. There was no God in that courtroom. Only citizens paying there debt to society. The true verdict was the death of one, the souls of three, and one family.

Boy Three

I feel in love with Bud when I was six. He was two years older and liked my freckles. Back then thats all I needed to fall in love.

Two Years Later

I was eight and Bud was no longer.

The author's comments:
A somewhat dark and sad short story.

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This article has 9 comments.


whammy BRONZE said...
on Dec. 17 2010 at 8:49 pm
whammy BRONZE, Place, Illinois
3 articles 0 photos 11 comments
Thank you! That was so sweet of you to say! 

Leann14 GOLD said...
on Dec. 16 2010 at 6:39 pm
Leann14 GOLD, DeGraff, Ohio
16 articles 4 photos 112 comments
Amazing!!!!!!! I couldn't say more! I know you want advice (from your forum) but honestly, I love every word.

whammy BRONZE said...
on Jun. 29 2010 at 11:56 am
whammy BRONZE, Place, Illinois
3 articles 0 photos 11 comments
Thank you so much for your thoughts and especially your feedback on things I could fix. 

on Jun. 26 2010 at 11:33 pm
roxymutt BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
4 articles 5 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see. -David Henry Thoreau

this is so sad...but i do like it...i loved how you started with the poem verrrrrrrrry good hook there were some awkward sentences but the content made up for all the little mistakes...u have a very thoughtful way of writing and i applaud ur unique style :) great job

on Jun. 26 2010 at 2:32 pm
LittleRedWritingHood, Nfdslf, Hawaii
0 articles 0 photos 45 comments

You really are a pretty good writer, so don't lose confidence in yourself. This piece is pretty sad too. It really explains how the sister/mom felt hen their brother/son died. I would suggest, however, that you add more details to the third boy. I think you should probably try explaining a little bit more on how he feels about Bud, and maybe even add a tiny scene where Bud is actually telling the boy he likes his freckles. It's fine the way it is, but this might make it a little bit better.

 

Also, on the first boy, when it says, "Mr. Jay had given him a blanket to dry off but water seeped through anyways and stained the floor," I think you'd be better off taking out the word "anyways". It would just sound a little neater that way.

 

You really did do a good job with this, and I think you should continue writing. You don't have to worry about returning the favor; I did this because I wanted to. Besides, the only two things I have up are a part of a story that I was writing just so I could have something to post on here. I found out in the third chapter that I actually didn't even like the story, and that I had no clue how it was going to end.

 

I wish you luck with your next piece!


on Jun. 26 2010 at 2:15 pm
aMANDA365 BRONZE, Versailles, Indiana
1 article 5 photos 28 comments

Favorite Quote:
1.No one can make you feel inferior without your consent
- Eleanor Roosevelt
2.I'll get there alive even if it kills me!
- Homer Simpson
3.It's okay to be crazy, but don't be insane.
- P Diddy

this is good..i like it!

on Jun. 25 2010 at 10:10 pm
taylorf463 GOLD, Marion, Kentucky
13 articles 0 photos 152 comments

Favorite Quote:
If he'll lie for you, he'll lie to you.

An ending was an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs of great stories let up to it, it would always had the last word.

This is REALLY good! I know it is sad, but it excellently written and I really do like the piece.

Btw, would you check out some of my stuff? Thanks!!! :)


whammy BRONZE said...
on Jun. 25 2010 at 9:26 pm
whammy BRONZE, Place, Illinois
3 articles 0 photos 11 comments
Thank you. 

on Jun. 25 2010 at 8:27 pm
ReadWriteBreathe PLATINUM, Pocatello, Idaho
24 articles 4 photos 114 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You have to consider the possibility that God does not like you" Tyler Durden Fight Club

This is a sad piece, but well written. I like when you wrote, "There was no God in that courtroom. Only citizens paying their debt to society."


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