December 28, 2017
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“I think you should leave,” I spit out. “I think you should leave and I think you shouldn’t have come here.” The words come out quick and icy. “I think it’s…it’s selfish. I think…” I trail off. I shove my hands in my pockets and take a second to catch my breath.
“You think, you think, you think. Stop thinking and feel something, Abel!”
She doesn’t get it. The words are bubbling up inside of me like I’m a can of coke and she’s been shaking me up. She’s been shaking and shaking since the day I met her and she just cracked me open.
“I feel everything!” I shout. I’m not shouting at her, just sort of in her general direction, filling the space between us with words.
“I feel everything, Tallulah. Because of you I feel the sun on my skin. I feel music in my chest. I feel oceans running through my veins. I feel everything. And I don’t know how to stop it. I don’t know how to exist without living. I don’t know how to exist without you. That Bukowski guy was right. You’re killing me.”
She’s inching toward me. Her eyes are glossy and her nose is red from the cold. I can see her breath.
“I love you,” I say. I feel the words slip out of my mouth. And I mean them. I love her. I love her so much it hurts.

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