Love & Lost | Teen Ink

Love & Lost

March 3, 2017
By katetadesse BRONZE, Lincoln, Nebraska
katetadesse BRONZE, Lincoln, Nebraska
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You miss every shot you don't take"


I do not know where I am. I do not know how I got here. I do not know where to go from here. All I do know is that everything is messed up but I don’t know how to fix it. I start running with all of my might, all of my strength and all of my soul. I just need to get away from this and go to a better place.

In order for this to make sense I need to start a while back. I was sixteen years old and went to Westview High School. I was an average kid who did alright in school but never felt like I belonged anywhere. I didn’t know that one person could completely change my life but I’m still not sure if it was for the better or worse. I didn’t have a lot of friends so when a boy showed interest in me I was eager to be with him. Zach was his name and he was sweet and kind and a gentleman.
Zach and I fell in love but his parents beat him and his sister, Charlotte. Charlotte was older than Zach but was very dependent on others. I urged my own parents to help him get out of that nasty situation but they refuse since they didn’t want to spend any more money on anymore wastes of time. We decided to marry in our favorite place in the city and then leave town. Charlotte officiated the marriage in the flowery meadow.
I lean in and passionately kiss him. I feel him in my soul, my urge to be close with him and I know he is the one. He is the person I have been waiting for. I don’t care what everyone else says about us. I love him. I love him. Wow I love him. I have never felt this way before. Who knew so much joy and happiness could be in one’s heart. Who knew we could have such a strong connection that I now knew I couldn’t live without. I knew we couldn’t stay there any longer so we leave the meadow and walk back to the car.
We need to leave this town and we couldn’t come back. Zach stops at my house and I quickly grab my already packed suitcase. I set the suitcase in the trunk of Zach’s car and then look back to the house that holds so many memories of my life. After we have everything we need we start driving and driving. Hours go by until we reach a small, beach-front apartment complex in florida. Zach talks to the owner while Charlotte and I grab our suitcases out of the car. Zach receives the keys and we enter our new 2 bedroom home.
After I unpacked the few items I brought, I go out onto the beach. I sit on my towel in the sand basking in the sun’s rays. After a minute, I began to sob unsure of what I had just done. I turn to see Zach walking down the stairs from the apartment towards the beach. I wipe my face off and then run into the ocean water to wash off my tears. The icy water hits me like a ton of bricks. I shiver and run back out of the water. Zach picks up my towel and throws it over my shoulders.
“Hey, are you okay,” Zach mumbles. “I know today has been a long day but their was no other way we had to do this and now we can be together.”
Zach looks me deeply in the eyes as I stare at his crystal blue eyes.
“You know I love you right,” says Zach then I lean in and kiss him deeply as my arms wrap around him.
“I know that, Zach”
Our lives become pretty routine after that. Zach finds a job in a nearby factory, I spend my days working in a small cupcake shop and Charlotte works at a bar and drinks the night away. After a couple years, Charlotte was pulled over for 2 or 3 DUIs before she was in an accident that hurt two people and she was forced to go to court for her drinking problem. Zach tried to find a good lawyer to defend her but we couldn’t afford much. After the first day of court the lawyer tells us that Charlotte has at least 1 year of jail if she gets lucky. We go home that night scared of losing her.
I wake in the middle of the night. Their was a clatter in the kitchen and I quietly get up without waking Zach. I walk down the stairs to see Charlotte standing next to the table that a gun rests on. The ground I stand on creaks and I am frozen in fear. Charlotte grabs the gun and c***s it.
“Don’t take another step,” Charlotte threatens as she lifts the gun pointed at my head. “I will shoot.”
“What are you doing, Charlotte?” I whimper confused on what is happening.
“It’s your fault. It’s all your fault.”
“What are you talking about, Charlotte?”
“My life is a mess because of you, Amber. I wouldn’t have to share my brother with another person if you weren’t here. Zach would of been there for me if you weren’t here. If you think he made the plans to run away after getting to know you then you are wrong. We planned it all before the move. He just made it seem like your idea so you would be on board. I don’t know why he wanted you to come when you only ruin things. I am just trying to make things better for everyone. That can only happen when you are not around.”
I stumble backward trying to get away from Charlotte. Then a large blast goes off and a body fall to the floor. My ears are ringing and I look down to see that I wasn’t the one with a bullet through me. Charlotte’s gun drops to the floor in shock. I see Zach’s body with blood gushing out of his chest. I sob and fall to my knees.
“What did you do? What did you do?” I chant as I hold onto Zach.
“Run, Amber,” Zach whispers into my ear. “I love you so much and never want you to leave me but you must. Run Amber please. For me”
“Zach, I love you and I will think about you everyday for the rest of my life,” I say through my tears. “Goodbye, love.”
I stand up with my blood dripping off my shirt, grab the keys and run out the door. As I speed down the stairs I hear another shot fired. I am frozen. I can no longer hear Charlotte’s cries. The keys fall from my hands and slip through the cracks of the staircase. I look down into the black void underneath and can’t see them anywhere. I just start running. I run along the beach and don’t stop. I run and run and just don’t stop I don’t know how to stop. My legs eventually go numb and I fall to the ground. My eyes close and then I wake in the bright daylight. I don’t recognize anything around me.
I do not know where I am. I do not know how I got here. I do not know where to go from here. All I do know is that everything is messed up but I don’t know how to fix it. I start running with all of my might, all of my strength and all of my soul. I just need to get away from this and go to a better place.



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