A Winter Memory

February 26, 2012
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The sirens rang outside and people pushed past me, but all I could do was stand at the foot of his bed and look down at him. I was frozen in time; no tears escaped my eyes, movement was futile. All I could do was keep thinking the same word over again, No! I looked at him never letting my eyes leave. His eyes closed as if he was sleeping, but his body was so cold. I would never see his chocolate brown eyes lighten up with joy and his blonde wavy hair sway with the slightest breeze. His eyes would remain hidden and never show emotion again. I would never again be held in his warm embrace. The tears finally came, and I fell to the floor on my knees. I didn’t hide my face behind my hands but let the pain show. “Jason!”

I woke up on a couch in a living room all too familiar; Jason’s living room. The good times were here but now hidden behind the shadows. The laughter we shared was now a faint echo lost in the wind. My grip tightened on the blanket that someone had kindly put on me. My tears now washed away, but the marks of it still showing. The sadness was gone, but something new had replaced it. It came boiling to the surface; my face turned to something that only belonged to a demon. I know someone had killed Jason, for it was not suicide. What could have brought them to the point of killing him? What had they to gain from this? These were questions I would have asked myself, but my sanity was precipitously disappearing; I have no more time to play games.

I know this is the point in any fantasy were my eyes would be turning crimson and my fangs come out; if this was a fantasy. The reality is that is never going to happen, and Jason isn’t going to magically come back to life like in Vampire Diaries. All I can hope for is that he went to a better place, but what I’m about to do will probably not land me a spot next to him with a halo and wings. I got up feeling light headed and got my coat. I looked around the house and the chaos that was still going on, so no one will notice I went missing, I walked right out the front door and didn’t look back.

When I stepped out of the house the cold crisp air touched my face, which was probably still red from crying, and then suddenly getting angry. I walked down the side walk and started heading toward my house. The snow crunched beneath my feet leaving trails. I breathed out and looked at the white cloud that came from my lips and smiled. Winter was Jason’s favorite season, and he had more than one reason why he loved winter. My favorite one was that memory’s lasted longer in the winter and of course his favorite was that he gets to drink a lot of hot chocolate and cuddle by the fireplace in his living room. A stray tear slid down my face. I remember just last week we made a snowman, but somehow it had turned into an all-out snowball fight. I hugged myself trying to keep the warm feeling of that memory, but it soon faded away.

I come to a stop as I reached the porch of my house and the anger started to resurface. I am here only for three things: get cleaned up, a weapon and my car, and then I would leave. So I went upstairs to take a shower and get some new clothes on. I put on a t-shirt and then put a black hoodie over top, and then a dark pair of jeans and then went downstairs to the garage. From there I climbed over unfinished projects that my dad has not yet finished, but most of it was junk. I finally came to were my father hide it and grabbed it; tucking it into my pocket. Then I went to the kitchen and grabbed my keys from the counter just as I was about to leave I looked back at my house. Jason may not have had time to write a note. but I did.

I got into my car and drove out of the garage. I looked back one more time at my house; it stood alone covered with snow and frost, and I had a feeling this was the last time I would see it. I gripped the steering wheel. “There is no going back now,” I said to myself out loud.

I drove right on through Main Street to the older part of town. They were there and waiting I thought as I came to a halt in front of a warehouse. Beer cans scattered all around from last night were still there. This is the last place I had seen him alive. I stepped out of the car and slammed the door behind me to tell them I’m here. I entered though a rusted over door and strolled right up to John and slapped him. My hand throbbed, but I hope it hurt him a lot more.

“What the h*ll was that for…?” John still taken aback knew why I had slapped him. I stood there glaring at him trying to fight back my tears. John who was tall and brawny with amber eyes and could sweet talk any girl had come to fall in love with me. He was always jealous of Jason and I knew he had some part in this.

“Cassie! I didn’t think they would kill him! The only part I played in this was to get you two apart!” John said while tears came pouring down his eyes, “I would never do something like that because I knew you loved him. They said it was only going to be a prank.”

“John shut up ok! Who are they?” I roared at him, and then it struck me. I was right all along. Samantha, I muttered under my breath as if it was a curse. I turned to face her as she stood there like a queen. Her long black hair flowed off her shoulders and her intense gray eyes pointed right at me. Overall beautiful but don’t judge a book by its cover. “How can you stand there as if you were still human?”

“You have no proof it’s me,” she snickered and everyone else who was standing around her muttered the same thing. “Hey, don’t blame her for his suicide!” Brandon, a jock, said. “Oh shut up you were in on it too!” I growled. I turned sharply back at Samantha.
“Stop denying it! All the people here know you did it or are supposed to be dead,” I smirked seeing her shocked face. “I know that Jason was not the only one who was supposed to die last night because John and I should have been killed in a car accident, am I right? John looked at me shocked. “How do you know that?” Samantha snapped.
“I’m not dumb unlike the people you hang around. I got it out of idiot there when he was drunk and kept mumbling about something to do with John’s car,” I said pointing to Brandon.
I laughed hysterically, “You have never liked me and hated anything that had to do with me. So when Jason, who had never given you a second look, fell in love with me, you got mad. Then when John fell in love with me and it outraged you, and the party last night was your perfect chance.”
The memory of last night began to clear. We were all hanging in a corner Jason, John, and me. Jason said he was feeling tired, and said he would be heading home but John wanted me to stay for a little longer. So I told him I would stop by later. After a while John offered to bring me home. But I had already heard from Brandon, something to do with John’s car, so we walked home instead. I walked straight to Jason’s house and found him in his eternal sleep.
“Well since you planned for me to probably not come out of here alive, I’ll do the honors.” I then pulled out my Fathers pistol and shot it in the direction of Samantha, but not caring if I had hit her I aimed it at my head. I guess in the end I can’t really kill her, but at least now I might be heading your way, Jason. The shot echoed thought out the room and my vision blackened.
Dear Mom and Dad,
I will never see you again for I have chosen my fate. If you want to know about Jason’s death and mine I would advise you to talk to Samantha Parker. I am deeply sorry for this, but I cannot live without him. I love you. Love, Cassie

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