A Chance to Love

December 28, 2011
I loved once on a cool spring day. The temperature hugged us in warmth, while the wind chilled our skins with goosebumps, pushing us closer towards one another. Together we walked, watching the white, blooming blossoms fall from the trees, getting caught in the cool breeze. Pulling my attention toward you and away from nature, you commented on how beautiful I was, how the wind blew my hair effortlessly. You caused me to smile uncontrollably. I wanted to say something back, but nerves held back words. I turned away instead, and right in the middle of my long-lived street, you took my hand and held it in front of me, in yours. You looked up in my eyes, and I could see all of you; waiting, wanting me to let you love me. You could finally see through me, you could see my fear. You wanted to take it away, you wanted me to be free from fear. In that perfect moment, I wanted to jump and fall into you forever. I wanted nothing more than you, I loved nothing more than you.

Now, I lie on my bed, listening to my heart beat for you. The stronghold on hurt is what I had. Vulnerability was not a position I could take, only to be risking another heart break. Now, I lie alone, wishing that I took that moment to fully live, wishing that I took that moment to fall. I pushed you away, and you could no longer break down the walls that I built.

Time, Change, and growth has revealed my mistakes. I only now hope, awaiting a chance to love.

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