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Summer Romance

Just let me see you. One more time, that’s all I ask. Let me see your perfect brown almond-shaped eyes and your crooked smile. Let me feel your arms come around me, your hands gently caressing me. Let me hear your perfect voice, telling me that it’s going to be alright. Let me smell your cologne, not too strong, but strong enough so that I may have it rub off on me, a little memento of you after you have gone. Let me taste your lips, warm and soft, molding perfectly with mine so that we can join together.

Am I the only one that remembers what we once had? Am I the only one that remembers the dates, the romantic walks at night in the summer air, fireflies all around us, lighting our way? Did you forget the bench on the park we went to every day, where we sat and talked for hours? Did you forget watching the children play, yelling and laughing, and you telling me that one day we would bring our children here?

How can you no longer feel the sparks flying when we just brush against each other? And the fireworks shooting up at impossible speeds when we kiss? What happened to the burning passion between us? Where is the attraction?

It wasn’t so long ago that you were telling me how much you loved me, and how much you wanted me. I loved you too. I still do. And I wanted you then just as much as I want you now. It felt so easy to give myself up to you, put myself in your hands, trusting you to take care of me. I crave that easiness, that simplicity.

My world didn’t just revolve around you. You were my world. Every thought I had included you. Every vision of what I wanted to do with my life included you in the biggest way possible. No matter what changed about my future, you always stayed the same. You were my constant, my rock. Something that I could hold onto when all else was lost.

You promised forever. You promised that the two year age difference meant absolutely nothing, that you weren’t ashamed of being a junior dating a freshman. That you didn’t care what your friends said, you cared about me more.

If that was true, then why did I never get to meet them? Why did I have to hide when you thought one of them walked by? How come when they finally found out about me, you tried to convince them that it wasn’t what it looked like, that we were only friends, and barely even that?

But then they said they saw us kissing. They said that they knew everything, and nothing you could say or do would erase what they saw. That you had a choice to make. Me or them.
You said you would choose me. You said that no matter what happened, you would never leave me. But when it came right down to it, you chose the other path, the one that left me behind. You left me behind, like a broken toy that you outgrew, and had no intention of ever fixing.
Summer has ended, and so has us. School will start, and we will pretend we don’t know each other, that we’ve never even seen each other’s faces. We will both deny the attraction, the heat. As much as I don’t want to, I will pretend you never even were a part of my life. And I know that you will do the same.
I want what we once had back. I just want to have one more moment where we aren’t pretending, that we aren’t living a lie. I want the goodbye kiss that we never got to share. I want the final hug, the final linger of our hands grasped together. I want the promise that we’ll still be friends, that there still might be hope for a future, when both our lives have changed. But most of all, I just want you, and our summer romance, back.




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RayBaytheDinosaur said...
Sept. 9, 2011 at 11:11 pm:
I really loved it... it almost made me cry because it reminded me of a breakup a few months ago. It wasn't a summer romance or anything like that but its so weird thinking that the other persons completely forgotten about everything that we had. I've moved on now but I can never break the connection of my first love and it'll always haunt me... you did a great job putting that into a story.
 
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