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The Love Drug
There was a mad look in Ricky’s eyes as he stared at me. All of me. For the first time in my life, I desperately wished that I wasn’t alone with a guy—that someone, anyone, was there with me.
“You look beautiful, Waverly,” he said gently.
I just forced a smile.
No matter how hard I fought back, I could’t keep my cheeks from blushing. I seemed to get that thrill of a feeling when he smiled his breathtakingly handsome smile and it made me feel like just crawling under my seat. My heart would flutter.
We arrived at the dance shortly after we left my house. But we did not get out of the car. At first, I had wondered why, but then I began to slowly understand. As the minutes passed, Ricky just looked at me and I stared back, wondering what he was going to say next. And then, he began to lean towards me from the driver’s seat, his quick breath tickling my cheek.
“Waverly,” he whispered. He allowed his lips to brush against me. “There’s no one I’d rather be here with than you.”
I gasped and asked why.
He didn’t respond. He just gave me a little smirk.
Three agonizingly long seconds later, Ricky reached for me and pressed down hard on my lips. Instantly, I was filled with a glorious sensation that flooded through my body as he wrapped his arm around my back. I felt like pushing all my good-girl side away, free to do whatever I felt like. But before I knew what was even happening, Ricky was far more entwined around me that I found at all comfortable.
“Let me go,” I whispered, not very convincingly. But I knew I was trying more to convince me than him.
His arms released me and our panting breath became normal again.
“What was that?” I asked, tears of both joy and fear welling up in my eyes. I wasn’t sure if I should be thrilled or terrified at what just took place. After all, it was only a simple kiss.
Or was it?
I didn’t really care. I had thought that I would grow old without ever being kissed. My tears slid down my face as he continued kissing me. However, instead of increasing my desire for affection, tenderness and relationships, my tears made me feel beautiful, impossible, loved…
His mouth took mine again.
Man, he was just so perfect. Kind and encouraging, something Cameron had never had enough backbone to be. Ricky was strong and confident and I liked that. In the dimness of dusk, his features seemed outlined even more drastically. His face was more mature now, with eyes dark and dangerous, yet understanding - with a hint of mystery.
He laughed a little, making me smile. His fingers ran through my hair and I could taste fresh spearmint on his lips; he smelled so good and his kiss was so heavenly that I wanted it to continue forever.
At last I came to my senses.
“Stop,” I whispered, as he kissed me still. “Please stop.”
But inside, I was thinking: Don’t stop - not ever! Please don’t stop - take me with you.
My heart was beating faster.
As we walked into the school gym where the dance was to be held, to my chagrin, I felt Ricky’s hand wander down from my back to hips. His fingers lingered lower than I liked.
Why didn’t I prepare myself for this? I demanded of myself, furious for allowing any of this to happen.
I wasn’t sure how to stop what was going on - I was not even certain that I wanted to.
Right as we stepped into the gym room, I was swathed in dazzling lights, vibrant colors and Disco music. My mind was relieved from the worry of this sexual tension between me and Ricky. Partners swished by me in flowing dresses of all shades and hues. Instantly, a newfound warmth swept through my nervous body and I felt my feet tingle with excitement at the anticipation of dancing and pushing this all behind us.
What should I do? I thought. Ricky’s hand had still not left my lower back. I know this isn’t right, but, I kinda like it. I’ve never really gotten male attention before! Besides, it’s normal isn’t it? Most girls get treated like this, don’t they?
Still standing awkwardly to one side, I waited as Ricky walked over to the refreshments table and brought me back a drink. I murmured a small thanks, though I wasn’t really grateful to him at the moment. Hoping he wouldn’t keep holding me, I sipped the punch nervously, though I was surprised by the bitter twang.
“Do you like it?” Ricky asked, giving me a hopeful look.
“Then would you care to dance, my lovely lady?” he asked with a cunning smile.
I nodded again.
Just then, the music changed from an upbeat retro tune to a slow, melodious love song. Great. It was just what I needed at a time like this. My heart was beating faster than I even thought physically possible.
Ricky held me so close that I could hardly breathe. Had a sheet of paper been tucked between us, it would have been lodged tight. Nervously, I allowed him to wrap me up in his arms and slowly dance with me towards the center of the dance floor. Uncomfortable and ill-at-ease, I hated the lustful way his eyes roamed over my features with a passionate hunger.
“Waverly,” he murmured.
He moved his lips to my ear so only I could hear what he said next, in a voice as soft and gentle as a kitten’s breath: “Come with me, Wave. Tonight at my place.”
I couldn’t believe what was happening. I had heard of stories like this but never dreamed it would ever happen to me. Why couldn’t I say no? I wanted to - or did I? Truthfully, I wasn’t even sure.
He coiled my hair greedily around his finger.
“Ricky,” I said harshly. “You know this is wrong. We can’t do this. I won’t.”
He laughed softly.
“Get real, Waverly! It’s no big deal. It’ll be fun.” He lightly pecked a kiss on my neck and held me tighter. In a low, eager voice he whispered: “Just me and you.”
This couldn’t be real.
“I don’t know,” I murmured.
“Don’t you trust me?”
At the moment, I wasn’t really sure. He leaned down to kiss me and planted one on my nose. Slowly, his grip on my arms became tighter and the strength of his grasp began to scare me. He was much stronger than I was and could easily manipulate me into doing whatever he wanted. Too easily.
Somehow, that freaked the heck out me.
“You’ll give in,” he whispered not so gently. “You’ll see.”
He leaned closer and danced, one hand firmly on my waist and the other running up and down my back. My skin rippled with dread and I felt the butterflies fly around in my stomach again. His curls tickled my face, but I was too frightened to do anything. I felt like screaming, running away or calling for help, anything to get out of his slimy arms.
Was I excited? Or was I terrified?
No, I couldn’t let this happen to me.
But inside, I wasn’t sure if I was exhilarated or horrified.
I had to be strong. I had to say no!
But, did I really want to decline it?
My head was spinning so hard that I could scarcely breathe. I felt like someone was pumping helium into my brain so much that I would explode or faint. I had always sworn to my parents that I would never do drugs, but for some strange reason, my body felt dazed, hypnotized, even sort of drunk. My foggy mind struggled to maintain my composure, Ricky now running his fingers through my hair.
I felt like gagging.
Everything was becoming a blur, the color zooming past me in an odd tangle of fabric and flesh. I was quickly becoming disoriented, though I had no earthly idea why or how. Ricky was still dancing with me, or more like supporting me up; I probably would have collapsed to the ground if he let me go. All around me, familiar faces were slow-dancing, too.
Where was I?
I looked groggily around, desperately trying to hold onto the fragment of my consciousness left.
I knew that voice. Someone was calling me. In a daze, I forced myself to turn around, face to face with the person I wanted to see more than anyone else in the world.
“Cameron?” I gasped. I forced myself to concentrate, grasping tight to Ricky to even stand up straight. “What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t coming.”
I struggled to hide the disappointment I felt that he was here when he had said that he wasn’t coming. Inside, I had sort of hoped he would ask me, but now I was here with Ricky.
Why was I here with Ricky?
I felt completely disoriented.
“I decided that I might as well come,” Cameron shrugged. “It sounded like fun.” To my relief, he looked as uncomfortable as I did.
Still hurt, I quickly said: “And this is my date. Ricky.”
It was then that I noticed the silent conversation that was being exchanged between the two of them. There was a tension in my best friend that I had never sensed before - a new apprehension.
“Hello, Ricky,” Cameron said with stiff cordiality. Ricky was not any more polite.
“Come on you guys,” I began, fumbling over my words. “Let’s go sit down. I’m not feeling too good.”
That was the understatement of a century. I felt like I was going to throw up. Still clinging to Ricky for support, I began to take little steps towards the bleachers on the side of the wall.
Just then, Cameron grabbed my arm and whispered in my ear: “Wave, we need to talk. Now. It’s serious.”?
“No,” I said as sharply as I could. I struggled to yank my arm away from him but I wasn’t strong enough. “You’re just jealous that’s all. Let me go. Stick to your own date.”
There was a sense of urgency in his eyes as he kept his grasp on me. To complicate matters all the more, Ricky stepped in and demanded why Cameron was trying to steal me away from him. For a moment, I feared that they might break out into a fist fight.
“Leave her alone!” Ricky demanded, shoving me away from Cameron. Without the support of either one, I felt my knees go weak and I dropped to the gym floor.
“Don’t you hurt her!” cried Cameron. In a blur, I saw him try to come to me but he was blocked by Ricky. Before I knew what was happening, I heard a sickening thud and Ricky had knocked Cameron to the floor. In just an instant, he was back on his feet and the two were at it like wild dogs and the screams from other teenagers let me know that it was getting pretty bad.
Horrified, someone ran to find some help before someone got seriously hurt.
And for a moment, I was forgotten.
“Waverly!” someone called my name. I didn’t even know who anymore. Everything was cloudy and I could barely see. Blinking as hard as I could, I struggled to keep in control of the small part of my brain that was still functioning. I saw security come from the front of the building and take Cameron by the shoulders as he tried to make another swing at Ricky.
Protectively, Ricky helped me up and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. I cried as I watched the men take Cameron away, kicking and struggling to get back to me and constantly trying to motion something that I didn’t understand. I watched them until they were out of sight before Ricky tried to lead me back to the dance floor as if nothing abnormal had happened at all.
“Ricky,” I said, feeling feverish. “I think I need to go home. I’m not feeling good.”
As if expecting this answer, he quickly said: “Oh, it’s alright. You’ll feel better. I promise.”
Our previous conversation flooded back to me and I was shocked to see that I had already forgotten about it. But now that I remembered, I needed to do something.
“No,” I said as sharply as I could. I had just a few ounces of strength left. I would use it wisely. “I need to go now. And I want to go find Cameron.” With a little smile, I turned and headed for the door.
With a quick move, he reached out and grabbed my wrist firmly, muttering something under his breath that I didn’t catch. But I didn’t wait to hear it.
“Goodbye, Ricky,” I said. I had no intention whatsoever of ever speaking to him again.
I tried to stomp off in the direction where the men had taken Cameron. For a second, I thought I was walking away with my head held high. But then I realized that Ricky was still holding me captive and dragging me back towards the door.
This was my one chance.
Swimming through the crowds, I glimpsed people staring at us as the gym became less and less visible and the doorway behind me was drawing ever closer. Now was the time to panic. I knew what Ricky wanted. And I knew that, especially feeling this way, I was no match against him.
“Help!” I tried to scream. “Someone help me!”
Quickly, Ricky stopped and began to play the boyfriend role again. He held me in his arms, patting my head and hurriedly asking if I was okay.
“She just needs some fresh air,” he told some people who had hurried over to me. His grip on me lessened and I saw my one opportunity. Using whatever I had left before I collapsed and lost everything, I slid from his arms and ran for dear life. My staggered steps were clumsy and I almost fell down several times before I made it to the open doorway that was guarded by security. But he didn’t follow me, probably as so not to arouse any suspicion.
In front of me, seated dejectedly on the wooden bench was Cameron. He looked up in surprise to see me and a smile of relief flooded his bruised face.
“Waverly!” he exclaimed, jumping up from the bench. “You’re okay!”
That was the last thing I heard. Everything was drained from me. Struggling to breathe, I staggered and fell into Cameron’s waiting arms.