My heart's in Heaven

March 13, 2011
I remember that dark cold night. The wind blowing and the rain wouldn't stop falling. All i could hear was the silence and the feeling of peoples eyes staring at me. I couldn't turn around and scream "go away, leave me alone!!" My eyes were locked on something specific. My hand on the wound,the blood just wouldn't stop and my eyes closed. My hand covered in red thick blood. I just kept whispering.."You'll be okay, you'll be okay..I'm still here." The eyes around me closed and the silence turned into whispers. I picked up my hand and picked up her hand. And surprisingly the whispers stop...All i could think about was why.

I just sat there, remembering all the good things me and her been through. All good memories between me and her. I try to remember something good, something perfect. Something that will make me forget this happened. But the only thing i remember was 2 years ago. When me and her were best friends. And I would always sneak over her house to listen to music and play board games. It was until one night that i snuck over, and me and her watched a movie together that me and her kissed. I remember that night perfectly. When i kissed her and pulled back. My body froze as i saw her smile, it was like feeling like your on top of the world, but your with her. You found her. She's the best thing that could ever happen to you..

I closed my eyes tighter. I didn't want to know that shes really gone..All the laughs and memories. I started to remember something else as a tear ran down my cheek.

It was last summer when me and her went camping together. Just me and her friends. I remember looking up at the clear summer sky, seeing the stars. As i look up, she pulled on my shoulder. I look back down and i saw her. I saw her eyes glistening as the fire across us burned. Her eyes twinkling. Then she smiled at me and i smiled back. I held her hand. The world froze. The fire stops and the talking quiets down. I moved in closer to her and kissed her as the stars above us explode. The tears ran down more. I just sat there holding her hand. I started to look back at the bad times between me and her. All the times i hurt her and made her cry.

I felt so broken. Now that i realize that i couldn't say I'm sorry to her anymore. I started to look back at this one time when i went over to her house at 3 in the morning. It was the weekend of course. I went over there as quiet as i can, but when i went over there and climbed up the ladder. I saw her and her boyfriend. Just sitting there talking. She looked over to her window and saw me. I climbed down as fast as i can. I just walked away as she open the window and started to scream I'm sorry. I really am...

I could remember one night, it was this summer. When me and her got into a huge fight. We would argue all day and night. I would try to calm her down, but she wouldn't stop crying. All the pain i put her through. I felt so broken. I never realize how much she meant to me. She just stop talking to me and walked away. I knew that i hurt her, but i couldn't say I'm sorry. Come back. I didn't want to hurt her anymore. I couldn't risk it..

Why did it have to be today, that she would have to be at the mall. It was this morning when i saw her at the mall, Just laughing with her friends. Being happy..She was happy. Later that day i was in the food court. She looked at me and started to mouth words. But i just looked away. I was being so dumb and foolish. I look down at my plate. A couple minutes i look back and saw her walking towards me. As i got up, i started to hear gun shots coming from downstairs. She ran away, going down stairs. What was she doing i thought to myself. I followed her, making sure she doesn't get hurt or anything. I could hear her screaming for her boyfriend. Was it her boyfriend who was doing the shooting? I looked over the railing, and saw her running down the steps. I saw her grab her boyfriends arm as she started to scream stop. Her boyfriend looked into her eyes, back up and pointed the gun to her chest. He started to scream "Back off..". I backed off the rail and ran to the stairs as fast as i can. I ran down the stairs and all of a sudden a loud bang went off. I paused and started to hear screams. I walked down the steps as slow as i can, My hear racing. As i got down to the last step i saw her on the ground, limp and covered in blood. Then i heard another bang, her boyfriend dropped to the ground. I didn't even care about him. All i cared about was her and only her.

I ran to her picked her up and told her its okay don't worry, its okay. I pulled her hair out of her face as she opened her eyes. I told her its going to be okay. That i was here now. She opened her mouth, but couldn't say anything. The blood coming from her stomach just wouldn't stop, I took off my jacket and covered the wound. She grabbed my shoulder and started to say really slow, in a weak voice. She said "I love you" She grabbed my hand and closed her eyes. She's gone..

I Closed my eyes as people started to surround me. I held the wound, as i started to mouth to her "I love you too, i love you" I just kept mouthing that over and over again. Till an old man grabbed my shoulder. He told me that "She's gone son, you can't do anything about it." He walked away, as tears started to go down my face. I couldn't do anything now.

I just sat there, holding her. Not letting go. I look over as i see the police and medics surround me. They started to say to me, that they could help. But whats the point shes gone, shes dead. They went over to check her boyfriend. I could hear them whispering. I started to close my eyes and block out the noise. I started to think about her. Think about everything. Then i started to mouth something. I slowly whispered.

"My heart's in heaven.."


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Victoria_P said...
May 3, 2011 at 2:42 pm
that was really sad. but it was really good. your a great writer. i can tell you put feeling into it. and it was great.
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