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A New Beginning (Part 12)
I was actually surprised at how ironic it was that my grandparents actually had bingo night tonight. Ha ha. Old people :)
My grandma of course invited me to come with them by I declined the invitation, leaving out the fact that I actually had a date tonight. My grandma was a little skeptical due to the fact that I had changed out of my normal clothes into something a little nicer forgetting that my grandparents were still home. I'm pretty sure my grandpa got the clue though because he winked at me and then said to my grandma, 'Hunny I think she's old enough to be home alone and not do anything TOO crazy.' He said emphasizing the 'too.' He gave me a sten look and then closed the door behind him.
BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ
I took my phone out of my pocket.
[Jason- Get out of your room!]
I walked slowly and skeptically out of my room with my back turned to the door looking out the window but Jason was no where to be seen.
[Jason-Wait! Open your window!]
I walked over to my window even more confused and putshed it open. Just standing there confused looking at the window. This was a bit crazy.
[Jason-Take ten steps back] I did so slowly...BUZZ! BUZZ! [Jason-Shut the door.] I did so, closing myself outside of my bedroom.
For awhile I stood there waiting for another text, but looking down at my watch I noticed that I had a half hour till my date. I decided to kill the time reading my book and fixing up my make-up. Ten Minutes went by..then fifteen...then twenty..
Finally! I thought. But then I remembered why I was excited and the butterflies in my stomach started councing off the walls again.
[Jason- Okay come to the door and open it and keep your eyes closed until I say so.]
I walked up to the door slowly. Taking every second to make sure that my hair was bouncy and curly and that my dress and skinny jeans didnt have anything on them. My hand started to shake as I reached for the handle of the door. This was something all new to me. I had never ever been nervous to go on a date.
I squeezed my eyes shut and pushed open the door.
"Okay! Follow my voice." I could hear Jason's voice coming from the window. I took a few slow precautious steps towards the window.
"Well hello to you too" I said laughing out of fear of knocking into something and jokingly.
"You look beautiful Les.." I could hear his reassuring smile in the way that he said that. It made me want to run over to the window, climb through into his room and lay in his arms forever. "Okay..Stop. Sit down where you are and open your eyes."
When I opened my eyes I thought that I was dreaming. Where there was just a window sill was now a red and white table cloth, paper plate and cups, and candles and at the center of it all was a small vase with sunflowers and dandelions.Although this doesnt sound too amazing, I just stood there silent not knowing what to say. No one had EVER gone into this much thought to do something like this for me.
"I..I dont know what to say..this is so special Jason.." He had a huge smile growing on his face, "How..how did you do this?"
"Ha ha well...first you take a board and put it across two windows, and then place a nice table clothe over it and order some pizza?"
"Fine.." He said throwing his hand up in surrender, "You caught me! You have to go pick some flowers up too.." He said trying to keep a straight face.
"Very funny" I said, a smile growing on my face.
"Well lets eat! This pizza is going to get cold." He reached behind him and brought out the pizza placing it onto the center of the table infront of us.
It was surprising to me how soon it got dark outside and how tired I was becoming. I didnt want to leave though. We had sat there across from eachother for what looked like hours talking about everything from funny family stories when we were younger to our favorite types of ice creams. It was absolutely perfect. It was so crazy how I could sit here with a basically a complete stranger and feel perfectly at peace and wanted.
"You look tired Les. You should get some sleep."
"Yeah I know and my grandparents will be home any minute..who knew bingo went this late?!..Not me."
"Yeah well what else do they have to look forward to anymore?" He said jokingly.
"Yeah..ha ha very true...well good night Jason."
"Goodnight Leslie." He said while pulling the makeshift table back into his room with everything on it and closing his window.
I did the same a crawled right into bed.
Soon I was walking through a hallway filled with mirrors. Looking for a door somewhere in the hall, but the hall seemed to stretch on forever. It was like no matter how much I walked and walked I couldnt reach the end...
And there were voices...Every mirror I walked past had a different voice.. I slowed my walk trying to recognize the different voices...
I found my Aunt Merdiths...
I looked into the mirror and the girlstanding there was the girl that I almost didnt notice.It was me..I was dressed in allblack,ripped jeans, and a few years younger then I was now..I was crying and confused.. I reached up to wipe a stray tear from my cheek, but when I reached up..there were no tears on my face..
Then the voice came.. "What's wrong with her these days sis? She's so dark..You should send her away to a boarding school..I mean look at her...She's falling apart."
I now knew why the little girl was crying...I remember those words so clearly in my head. I remember sneaking down and the cold stairs of my house and listening on a conversation my mom and my aunt werehaving.."
I walked away from the mirror slowly butfound myselfrunning into another mirror..This mirror looked like it was falling apart on the edges.. Like some type of animalhad scratched at it for so long thatIwasholding itself toether by just a fewpieces of chipped wood around the sides...
I looked at the girl inside the mirror...It was me again..but different from the last.This girlseemed more stuck and lost.She had bags under her eyes, and her eyes were blood shot red..Her clothes..Her bottoms were missing and all that could be seen was her light pink underwear under the long torntea shirt..Her knees had scratches on them..like she had falled alot of times..
Then the words came in..just hearing the voice send a shot through my spine..
It was my dad's mirror..
"Leslie?! Leslie?!...Hunny what are we going to do?...Ive tried everything. She is tearing apart this family..I could never show her to any of my co workers...Shes a god awful mess!"
Tears filled my eyes.. I remember this night as well..
I came home drunk from a party...I had had too much to drink, a guy...I dont remember which guy..tried to force me to sleep with him..but I ran..I decided to walk home instead of calling..I figured they would come pick me up if I begged... They had no clue I was even out of the house.. As I walked home..I fell a couple of times...and then fell asleep outside of my locked house...when the sun came up the next morning I was pulled into the warmth of my house by my father.. I remember wakingupand hearing them talk...
Iranfrom this memory looking for a happy image of myself, something that would reassure me that I wasn's as bad as everyone else thought I was...that I was just..Me. Leslie. A different person,butall of the images I saw wereof my tornup, and dark.
Jason. I had to find Jasons mirror. I began to run trying to hear his voice but I couldnt..I fell tomy knees out of tiredness and that when I heard it. I thought it was Jasons,I looked up to see a mirror that was split down the middle to maketwo sides...I stood out of breath looking into the first one..
Shock blew over me when I looked in and saw the exact picture I had seen in my dads except for this time I was more injured and in a hospital bed...
Jason's voice filled around me..
"Leslie I know you dont know me..but the doctors here say that when people are unconscious...it heps to still talk to them..maybe to pull them back to reality.."
Confusion swept over me.. What was this?! I knew exactly where I was..I was in the hospital after the car wreck I had gotten into for drunk driving with one of my exs...I cant even remember his name... But why was Jason voice in this one??...
"Gosh Leslie..Yourea mess..I mean gosh that didnt some out right..youre beautiful...but what happened? How did you get this hurt?...I guess it doesnt matter..I guess Ill tell you about myself...Im in your grade at a different high school then you but I think we went to the same elementary school together.. I love reading and I know this sounds strange but I like helping elderly people especially ones with mental disorders..I think some how it makes me feel normal..."
His voice started to fade and I longed for relief in the other side of the mirror. This one of me was relieving. It was me, on our date that night.
"Gosh you look beautiful Les..." then it faded and he spoke again, "Hi I'm Jason.." Then a BUZZ BUZZ! and a text flew onto the mirror, [I really dont like to see....] but before the whole text could come through the screen it faded and I couldnt read it anymore, and Jasons voice faded as well. I searched for relief in the mirror but found none, the girl in the mirror stood their in fear as hand came frombehind and ripped pieces of the mirror away. I began to scream! I started running and running..
I shot up in bed not able to comprehend what I had just watched. I had sweat dripping down my face and my hands were holding onto the sheets as if they would fall apart if I didnt hold them together.
What had I just seen?