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Am I really in Love?

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Am I really in Love? I ask that question to myself everyday. Do I love him? Or on the other hand, am I just longing someone to be with? How can I find the answers when the guy is sitting right in front of me? I can’t ask him, he’ll just laugh at me or not respond. I don’t know which is worse. I wonder what he is thinking, I wonder what is on his mind. I wonder what lies behind those dark brown curls and those soft green eyes. I wonder what would happen if I ever told him what I was thinking. I hope he would still love me even though I’m not sure if I love him. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to feel, I don’t know how to act, and I don’t know what is real. And there he is right beside me, holding my hand. Right beneath the bright blue sky out on the sand. I wonder what tonight would be like if I knew I truly loved him. But now I can’t decide what to do. I don’t know right from wrong. And all that’s left for me to do is last this whole night long.

Does she really love me? I can never tell. She just means so much to me ever since I saw her eyes. She transported me to this special place where she was strong and tall. And she told me what I wanted to hear. She said to me that she loved me. But I’m not sure anymore. One day she was staring at me with those soft brown eyes of hers. She stared for so long I felt that I could see her soul. Her mind was open and her face was sweet. I don’t think I’ve seen her like that since then. How can I ask her those questions I have? How can I tell her how I feel? Does she know that I’m in love with her or that my love is real?

I wonder what he will say when I tell him my feelings tonight. I wonder what his eyes will look like, surprised? Full of fear? Or fright? Maybe he will just be shocked or maybe he will cry. I just hope that what I do won’t make him want to die. I love him. I really do. But my heart is set on someone else. I don’t know how to tell him, that I just want to be friends, I don’t know what to say to him to make those requiring amends.

“Honey, I don’t know how to tell you this…”

“Carmon, I know what you are going to say.”

“Seriously dear, I need you to know. I need you to see. I need you to hear. I need you to listen to what I have to say. Because chances are that you won’t figure it out today.”

“Carm, I’m listening, I won’t laugh or scream. Just go on and tell me cause I don’t know what to feel.”

“Alright now, here it goes. When I first met you, your eyes made me smile, your hair made me blush, and your body made me die. Now that I have known you I realized that you are no longer just that to me. You mean so much to me but not the way you think. You are my very best friend dear but no more than that. I really hope that you won’t hate me forever and that we can still be friends. I know that is such an old line but it means the very best. I wish we could stay together forever but that is not what I want. I really want to be with you so please tell me what you are thinking.”

“I think I’ve known for a while that this is what it would come to. Friends are not an option because the way you made me feel. I won’t not wave when you pass me by but only time can tell what the end will be like for me and you and I hope that all is well.”

So am I really in love? I think not anymore. From this day forward I will see what others make me for.



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bluebel304 said...
Nov. 24, 2010 at 10:09 pm

This was amazing. So sad though :(

also, IT DIDNT HAVE GRASSHOPPERS OR ANTS!!! bleehhhh how could you??

 
sparkledreamer replied...
Nov. 25, 2010 at 12:23 am
ur annoying, and I purposefully didn't add grasshoppers or ants just to annoy you.
 
bluebel304 replied...
Nov. 27, 2010 at 2:44 pm
bleeeehhhhh. well, it was awesome anyways. you r learning, my young grasshopper
 
ambergem said...
Nov. 24, 2010 at 1:14 pm
I loved reading this. I definatly could relate. (:
 
writergirl13 said...
Nov. 24, 2010 at 12:45 pm
I actually liked the rhyming! I'm usually not much of a poem person, so this is like in the middle, between a poem and a story. It's just a great piece that reads well! As for the plot itself, I think it's something a lot of people can relate to. I know I can- this is happening to me right now. You made me feel so many emotions! Great job, and please keep writing. Remember to stay un-swayed by what others say to you about your writing and keep writing for your own sake. Also, please check out an... (more »)
 
Medina D. said...
Nov. 24, 2010 at 11:37 am
uh................good story............but the rhyming was annoying...............
 
Tayrodactyl said...
Nov. 24, 2010 at 8:22 am
I didn't like the rhyming, but the story was good overall
 
Dawnheart said...
Nov. 23, 2010 at 4:50 pm
It was ok; the ryming bugged me a little. It felt like a poem, then a story, then back to a poem. I liked how it switched from the guy to the girl.
 
happysoul replied...
Nov. 29, 2010 at 5:24 pm
I didn't see that it rhymed until the comments. Put it in poem style next time, I loved it! Write, you've got great talent! -Noelle
 
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