If you looked inside a girl you’d see her strength. Her humble beauty. Her drifting confidence. How hard it is to stay strong. Her loyal friends. Her weary tears. Her undone smile. Her tender heart. With all her love. Coming out like extra change. How hard it is to hold on. How easily things come to her. And all the walls she put up. You’d see how mean people can be. How much she wishes would go away. How much she thinks. How much she daydreams. How she looks at you like the stars that shine. How much she rolls her eyes. How she wishes she was 3 again. How her eyes shine. You’d see slamming doors, and how she lays awake at night. How she needs you next to her. How the walls come down around her. How she has to cram it all down her throat. All the pain that life causes her. You’d see how much she second guesses herself. How she doesn’t want to lose you. How she wonders if anything is right. How much regret is waiting for her. How she doesn’t want to live a lie. You’d see her jar of hearts. And how much they fall down. How much she wishes you would pick them up. You would see how much she loves hearing you voice. How she misses you when you’re gone. But you’d also see her happiest moments. Like every moment spent with you. How nervous and shy she really is. How outgoing she pretends to be. To impress you. All the stories. Everything she has to get off her chest. How boring her life is without you. How much she wants to confess. How much she’s been on the brink. But what you’d really want to see is how she remembers every moment you made her laugh so hard that she would cry. Every joke you played on her. Every nickname you gave her. And how much she loves it. How much you tease her. But she doesn’t mind. She even likes it. Just a little. Or maybe a lot. How she looks forward to every class she has with you. And all the wishes she made about you. And how much she hopes they will come true.
If You Looked Inside A Girl,
July 5, 2010