Love is a Big Word

July 7, 2010
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He had a problem- a really big one. I didn’t make him fix it. I didn’t even fault him at all. I wasn’t mad. Not yet.

We’d been going out for a long time and he’d planned a special month anniversary. Guys don’t really do this, but my best friend clued him in. She told me that this ones for keeps mainly because this was the first guy that hadn’t yet called her the B word.

Jason Harris was the nicest guy I’d ever dated. He was cute with his light brown locks, not to mention kind. One time at school I saw him in the hall helping a girl pick up her books. He didn’t even bump into her or had anything to do with the books being on the ground. The girl was there with her books scattered around her and he just came up- like a gentlemen- out of nowhere, bent down and helped her. He played the guitar for me once when I was crying and always asked me how my day was.

I know it sounds like I hit the jackpot, but I didn’t. Jason Harris had a problem and I couldn’t solve it. It started in April. We’d been going out for five months-ever since the Winter Dance in December. I thought he’d just go to the dance with me, but then he asked me to be his girlfriend. You cannot imagine how happy I was.

Anyway, it was in April and we were walking home together like usual. I couldn’t look up at him though. My eyes were stuck on the concrete, and my lips were curled up in an excited smile. He was walking beside me by the curb staring at me.

“What’s wrong?” I was usually very talkative and right then I hadn’t spoken a word since I said hi to him in front of the school.

“Nothing.” I could feel myself blush a nice bright red.

He smiled at my attempt to lie. “What is it?” We stopped walking and he tried to get his eyes to meet mine even though they were purposely avoiding him and LOOKING AWAY. It didn’t stop him and I had no choice but to look him in the eyes.

“Tell me.”

“I love you.”

He stared at me shocked for a couple of seconds, closed his eyes as I watched a shade of pink spread across his cheeks, and he stepped away from me.

“Your mom is probably waiting up on you,” his tone was blunt and with no emotion, it felt hurtful. It was like a translated goodbye, but it was something I didn’t want to hear. I wanted something more like an “I love you, too” or something corny like “I can’t live without you.” Anything- he could’ve said anything, but a translated goodbye. I mean, he couldn’t even say it out right.

But that was okay because I loved him enough to wait. He had a problem and I couldn’t wait until he fixed it.

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This article has 9 comments. Post your own now!

wonderHaley said...
Aug. 26, 2011 at 10:39 pm
sarah4president replied...
Nov. 10, 2011 at 1:54 pm
i totally agree
Odessa_Sterling00 said...
Jul. 28, 2011 at 12:51 pm

It was ok, but there seemed to be a lot of useless details that made it feel choppy.

And in my opinion, not saying "I love you" when you want them to isn't a "really big problem".  They are more careful, they think things through.  Duhh.

wonderHaley replied...
Aug. 27, 2011 at 9:16 pm
I disagree. I thought it was terrific. And, no, not saying i love you back when someone says it to you, isn't realllllly a big deal, but seriously, its a good story, and I love where its at and hopefully where its going if she decides to continue.
wonderlandhaley said...
Mar. 22, 2011 at 3:41 pm

leneypanini, ohhmygodd! i have read every single one of your stories and you are like, my IDOL. I love youu and someday i want to be as good of a writer. 

I have stories on Teen Ink but there totally horrible! 

If you can could you PLEASE comment on at least oneee and give me advice on how to improve! Thankssss<3

MaysileeDonner said...
Jan. 31, 2011 at 11:10 pm
OMG, u should totally continue it! it was such a cliff-hanger, i was like waiting to c wat wud happen and then i was like awww, it's over!!! <3
hellas54 said...
Aug. 28, 2010 at 4:16 am
leneypanini replied...
Sept. 7, 2010 at 10:14 pm
aww thanks:) any suggestions for how i'd continue?
monkeyface replied...
Feb. 24, 2011 at 10:20 pm

if-hangers all the good books and stories have clif-hangers

to me this is good and bad good because it makes people really want to know morem and bad  because im dying to know more and dont want to wait for the next part of this if you do choose to continue.

oh well...


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