Once You've Lost It You Can Never Get It Back

July 6, 2010
By Anonymous

It is pouring rain outside, the first time in weeks since summer began. He stares out the window deep in thought. He cannot stop picturing his face, the beautiful green eyes that anyone could get lost in and that gorgeous smile that always appeared when he was around him. It is as if he feels his hand touching his own and his lips on the nape of his neck. Closing his eyes, he breathes in deeply taking in the sensation. He feels his hands traveling down his chest, to his waist embracing him, as if he is trying to say that everything will be alright. Slowly he stands up trembling from what he feels is real, truly wishing that it is. He opens his door and puts his hands in his pockets, padding softly down the hallway. He can’t escape it. He hears his laughter everywhere around him, his angelic voice telling him that he is his everything. He looks up with tears in his eyes as the walls around him seem to be closing in. His breathing shortens and heart quickens. Racing towards the front door he reaches for support finding balance against the staircase. He sits down putting his head in his hands and the feeling of emptiness surrounds him, suffocates him; kills him. With the loss of hope he crawls towards the door and opens it and braces himself, standing up once again. He carefully takes two steps out onto the driveway and lifts his head up to the sky while the rain washes away his pain. Slowly opening his eyes a figure comes into view, blinking twice he makes sure he isn’t dreaming. He sees his outstretched hand reaching for him to take a hold of. Without hesitating he grabs on and holds on tight moving closer to him. His smile reaches across his face, immediately making all of his troubles disappear, “I love you” he softly whispers, barely audible as if it is being carried by the wind. His hand gently strokes his face; his green eyes staring directly back at his. He moves in closer and he closes his eyes feeling his warm, delicate lips against his own. Moaning softly he takes a short breath in and opens his eyes, only to find that there is nothing there but the rain. He lies down in the driveway and smiles, putting his hands behind his head. He looks up at the sky knowing that he is watching over him and knows that he will forever be his.

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