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Thinking Oh, is it Love?
Thinking oh, is it love?
After Chemistry class I had to go to the portables outside my school to get tortured by an advanced functions math course. As I made my way through the crowded halls I clutched my text books tightly against my chest praying I wouldn't drop them bringing unwanted attention to myself. Whenever someone looks at anyone they are making a judgement or an assumption about that person, and frankly that scares me. I would rather remain invisible.
As I neared the doors leading outside to the portables I felt my legs becoming weak. I tried to escape any eye contact with other students, but today my modest pink sweater must have been standing out. Derek Johnson, captain of the football team looked right at me, with his piercing green eyes. As I pushed through the doors I decided that looking down while I walked was my best option to avoid another awkward situation. I quickly made my way across the field towards my math class when I noticed a skinny brown haired boy named Mike, who was in my class, walking towards the school. I looked down as I passed him.
"We're supposed to have lunch now, and come back at 1:00," he said. My mind froze, but my legs kept going towards the portable. He talked to me? He knows we're in the same class? My feet started to forget how to walk, my legs shook nervously and before I could calm myself down my left foot decided to cross in front of my right making me trip, falling flat into the wet grass and leaves. I laid there without making a move after contact with the damp ground. Maybe if I don't make a sound he won't notice I fell and he won't-
"HAHAHAHA," he laughed an enormous chuckle which made me want to become one with the earth. I could disappear right here into the wet leaves forever.
"Jen, are you okay?" he managed to ask through laughs. His laugh was genuine, wholesome and quite beautiful. Why did he have to turn back? As I lifted my head out of the grass I felt his strong grasp on my arms lifting me to face him.
"Mhm" I said as I quickly moving my eyes away from his. With his hands still touching my arms in one fluid motion he reached up to my forehead pulling a giant brown leaf out of my hair.
"Uh-oh. That's an issue." he paused, "Oh, I know! The drama department always has extra clothes hanging around. They won't mind, lets go." I looked down examining my shirt, it's peachy pinkness now overtaken by mud and leaves. How embarrassing; my cheeks turned red with heat.
"You're embarrassed, it's cute." Mike teased. A new feeling consumed me. I felt flapping within my stomach, like the butterflies you hear about when someone falls in love. But I didn't like Mike, he was just very nice, and thoughtful and kinda cute. I managed to laugh a little at his comment.
When we got to the drama room Mike was talking with one of his friends Billy. Mike rummaged through a clothing bin while they talked about an upcoming performance. I could tell Billy wondered why Mike was with a girl like me.
"Here." Mike said as he passed me a bright blue tank top, "the colour will bring out your eyes." He motioned to the dressing room across the stage. Mike started to talk to Billy about stage plans.
"Thanks," I said shyly as I moved across the stage finding the room. I pulled off my dirty sweater as I examined the shirt Mike had given me. It was pretty and surprisingly it looked good. When I came out of the dressing room I stuffed my sweater into my bag.
"Thanks so much Mike. This was really nice of you," I said in my most confident voice as I left the room.
"No problem," he called after me with his nose stuck into a book. I could hear Billy laughing right after I left, but I knew it couldn't be about me. I was being paranoid. As I continued down the hall people were starring a lot, and some were even laughing. Was there something on my face? I started to panic. When I saw the girls bathroom door I darted towards it to make sure there was nothing wrong with my appearance. I looked into the mirror. I looked like I did everyday. Take some deep breaths I told myself. As I turned to leave I saw something on the back of the shirt that I had not noticed before. The reflection in the mirror read, 'N-A-I-B-S-E-L.' I was mortified. Mike did this after acting so nice to my face. He thinks I'm a LESBIAN? I started to cry. How many people saw that? Oh my God. And I thought I liked him! Just then there was a huge knock on the door.
"JEN? Jen, are you in there? It's Mike. I'm so sorry Jen, I didn't know that was on there. We used that shirt in a play last month just as a prop. I didn't know. Jen?" Mikes voice was sincere, but I couldn't answer him. I just wanted him to go away. I tried to control my sobs so that he would just leave. As I turned to get something to wipe my tears away Mike came through the door into the girls bathroom. He wrapped his arms around me in a tight embrace.
"Oh God Jen, please don't cry. I am so sorry." He took off his sweater and wrapped it around me covering the bright pink word.
"Please forgive me, I didn't know Jen," he told me as he wiped tears from my face.