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Is it too late to fix this?
I sat at my desk, avoiding his sky blue eyes, my heart racing at how close he was. I could feel his eyes on me, but I didn’t want to look up. Panic seized my entire body. I wanted him to be this close, I wanted him to look at me and I wanted so much to talk to him. But, there was one problem with that. Wanting something was totally different from being capable of doing something.
I sat there, memorizing my paper and doing all of my work, so much so, that when the class was barely half over I was finished with all my work. I sat there thinking, CRAP! WHAT DO I DO NOW?!?
I snuck a glance at him glad to see that he was still doing his work, unlike me, who was a fool and had the rest of the period to try to look busy! I mentally kicked myself for being so stupid. I couldn’t gawk at him all period, like I wanted to; I had to pretend not to notice him. Which is pretty stupid, especially if you really liked this hott (yes, hot with an extra “T”), and you were like all crazy about him. Well, I guess not that stupid, considering…well…it is stupid. I should just open my mouth and talk to him and ask for a pencil or something.
“Hey, Cameron?” He looked up at me! Oh my goodness! Okay, now play it cool!
“Yeah?” Oh my gosh! He replied to me! Yay!
“Do you have a pencil I can borrow?” He’s looking at me funny! Why is he looking at me funny? He’s smiling now, with all those gorgeous straight white teeth!
“I do, but—“But! Why is there a BUT! “You already have a pencil.” I looked down at my hand where he was looking. There it was, like a…well, something horrible.
“Oh, never mind.” I spent the rest of the hour glaring at my stupid green mechanical pencil. Oh! This was terrific! I finally get the courage to talk to Cameron (okay, I realize that I didn’t really talk to him, but Come on! Give me some kudos for actually having a verbal conversation with him!), and I ask him for a pencil, which was totally lame, and then…I have a pencil in my hand! Darn pencil! I think that I’ll burn it. First, smash into a jillion pieces and then burn it!
I think I’m going crazy! I can see me now going for my next check up at the doctor’s, sitting in his cold office on that stupid white paper that makes noise whenever you move! And our convo goes like this:
Me: Hello Doctor!
Doc: Hello patient! I heard about what you did in your third hour English class and you are most definitely crazy!
Me: Oh the horror! What do you prescribe me to do?
Doc: Oh, nothing can be done for your kind of craziness; you have to spend the rest of your life in a mental institution.
Me: Woe is me!
Doc: Yes, I’m surprised that you didn’t die of embarrassment! I believe I would have!
Me: (Sarcastically) Thanks Doc.
That’s how it would happen!
To Be Continued…