Why do i love you so?

February 11, 2010
peoples names have been changed 2 hide there identity....

My names Sasori. Im a gay 15 year old boy. Im in a high school. Im in love with my very first boyfriend.Hes name is James. He is a year older than me. We attend 2 different schools. I really hate that we dont get to see each other allot. Only once every 2 weeks were able to see each other.

Im very much in love with him. I show it to him, he finds it irritating and cute at the same time. But mostly, i irritate him. He gets mad at me real easy. I dont like it, but i have to deal it. He is very strict with PDA,which sucks. Like come on, we only see each other once, the least he can do is make our time last together. I understand that he doesnt like it, thats why we go to the restrooms and make out hehe. But at times he wont do it. It really makes me sad. When i go little things, like lay my head on his shoulder, he nudges me off his shoulder, it really hurts me mentally and physically.

We always fight but at the end we always work things out. But i wish we wouldnt fight so much. But if anything he starts it, he does things that makes me mad and sad, then i talk about it trying to be nice, then he takes it the wrong way and end up FIGHTING. Usually when we fight i always CRY (im really sensitive). But he wouldnt care, hell just say, "stop crying, gawd your such a girl". Then i end up stopping, sometimes. Then im the one who ends up saying sorry, when it wasnt my fault. I say it because i know hes being irritating by me. Then we just talk about how much I MISS HIM. i always miss him, i always tell him that i miss him. But he never says it to me. He doesnt like showing hes feelings to people. But when he tells me he misses me, i take advantage of it and we have a nice talk, usually.

I also hate the fact that he always chooses hes friends over me, even though he gets to see them at school all the time, while we only see each other once every 2 weeks :(. Hes best friend is a girl named, Lila. They always hang out together. He does everything with her. Unlike me :( he doesnt like doing much stuff with me. But when he does do STUFF he makes me so HAPPY. But i wish he can put most of his attention on me more than hes friends. Also when we make plans he says " NO...NO...NO".
But when its hes Friends HE says "YES" instantly. I hate it, it makes me so mad. He says i dont like favoritism, but he always favors his friends more. GAAH its so irritating.

What really sucks is our ways to communicate with each other. Before, when we just like met and wanted to be friends, we always talked on the phone, but now we barely talk. He always takes naps rite after school. He cant because hes parents get mad at him when he uses the phone. It really Sucks. And what really makes me mad is that, when i ask him to stay up, he gets mad and say NO because hes too tired to. Then the next day, he goes out with Lila somewhere. It drives me mad.I Freaking hate it when he does that. Then we end up fighting again. But as usual, we fix it and it.
Also how we communicate is through texting. Just like every other teen. But im on a Plan with unlimited Texting, whike James is on Load. Which really sucks, because when he runs out of load, we cant text. and thats our MAIN LIFE LINE on our relationship. And he cant buy load till the next weekend or until i buy load 4 him, which he hates. But i do it because, sometimes, i feel like were gonna drift apart and loose interest in each other. Hes already Starting too :(. Im not loosing interest in him, hes my first love. I will never lose interest in him. I love him so much. I dont know what to do if im not in a relationship with him.

ok thats it for now...i cant think of anything to write, but when something comes up, ill put up a new story. BYE and thank you for reading.

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This article has 2 comments. Post your own now!

TheReader! said...
Mar. 8, 2010 at 10:14 am
I really liked that. I think if you make a story about your feelings and all it would be great! good work!
silence-is-loud replied...
Apr. 9, 2011 at 3:10 pm
good job but a lot of spelling errors.
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