All time low

January 24, 2010
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So I lie silently in my bed and cry and just let the pain flow out. Crying every night and not wanting to talk anymore I don’t know how to fix it. Im not who I used to be and I miss the old me but I don’t know how to reconnect to who I used to be. I try so hard to not let it get to me but when I lay down in my bed every night I think of what I had and start to regret life and being me. So much I gave to him and that love I felt was true it wasn’t like anything I have ever felt before. But then he says good bye and everything falls apart within seconds everything that I thought was something has vanished to nothing. It was the first night in weeks that I cried myself to sleep. I looked in the mirror and sadness and pain filed my face. Regretting how far I let myself fall for him and how deep I let myself love him. I can’t stop thinking about him and it hurts to know he doesn’t feel the same anymore. I need to find the happiness I had and find who I used to be I can’t go on living like this it isn’t who I want to be.

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