Distant Memories

December 25, 2009
By Anonymous

“Whats the point anymore?!” She asked.
“I don't know...” A sullen voice replied. “And this is probably going to make you upset... but I don't feel anything...”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean I don't feel anything.. I could at this point take it or leave it.” He didn't blink.
“Then why are we doing this?” Her voice cracked and a tear slid down her cheek.
“I don't know...” He responded.
“I don't know what the point is anymore.” She was crying.
“I don't either...” He didn't show any signs of emotions.
“I want to know why... I want to be happy like we used to be.” Her voice was broken, her face tear stained.
“What happened to us?” He still showed nothing.
“I don't know.” She sounded bitter as she spit the words out.
“Do you still want this?” Nothing. Those words sounded cold. There was nothing to them, he gave her no deeper meaning, there was no warmth no feelings of wanting to continue.
“I don't know what I want anymore. I used to want you... I wanted us to be happy.. but these past months have brought nothing but pain to me. I don't know how to handle this. I don't see the point in this relationship anymore.” She buried her head in the pillow.
“The decision is yours to make.” He said quietly
“I can't take this anymore.. we are done.” A new wave of tears washed over her.
“I'm starting to feel bad now..”
She didn't respond. She doesn't care if he now feels bad. He made her miserable for months and now.. Now she ends it and he now says he feels bad? She wants to scream. She wants to tell him everything he did wrong. But she doesn't. She swallows hard knowing she is as guilty as he is. She feels anger towards him. She hates him with everything she has in her. She never wants to see his sorry face again. Coldly she tells him she has to go and cries herself to sleep.
The next morning she feels numb to it all. She feels its all a dream. Like nothing happened the night before. She reaches up to her neck and feels no necklace. She looks around her room she sees no pictures or any traces of him. She sees a white envelope and remembers it is real. She broke up with him. They no longer are together.
Weeks pass by and she still feels numb. She talks to everyone like she is normal. But every time she sees anything to remind her of him her heart breaks again. She shows no depression she shows no emotions toward him. But a battle rages within one she fights continually.
Almost a month after she finds while cleaning her room the envelope. Its bulging with letters, pictures and such remains of him. She opens the envelope and finds no emotions rising like she expected. She fondly runs her finger across a picture taken earlier in the summer remembering the time she and he spent with their friends. She pulls another picture and smiles remembering that summer. They did so much yet so little together. And now as she looks at these pictures, cards and letters she sees him as just a distant memory.

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