Tags of a loved one

November 15, 2009
Out on the roof of the apartment building, we look out to see the nighttime sky of the city. I stare in awe, the bridge lights went form red to green before I knew it. I looked over to see Trace looking over the balcony gazing at how high we were. It made me wonder why he looked so surprised, he lives here and practically lives up here, what was so amazing that he has never seen before? I wanted to ask but I caught glimpse of the moon and my mind went off. There was barely any moon to see but what ever was left of it made it look like and accessory to the sky. I continued my focus on the scenery till Trace grabbed my hand and held it. The hairs on my back stood on end, and my heart rate just increased about three more beats per minute. He was warm, I could feel his pulse, it was relaxed.

We stood there for which seemed like a minute till he sighed and looked at me. I wondered what he was thinking, I didn't look at him. I wasn't done with the art work before me. “ Do you like it up here?” He asked. I grew a little upset when he interrupted the tranquility of the moment but there was no way of ever getting it back so I decided to include myself in the conversation. “ Yeah, I'm jealous. You get to see this every night when you want to. You're lucky.” He gave me a big smile and said “I know.” He stepped closer to me with our hands still touching. He leaned in towards my ear and said softly, “ I have a surprise for you Leo. wait here.” He ran behind me and all I could hear was music. I watched him grab something form the black bag behind the Burger King bag.

I couldn't help but to smile because it seemed like he was trying so hard to make this a night I will never forget. I wondered why. As he ran towards me I could hear his father's dog tags bouncing off his chest. He came up to me and gave me this red box. It wasn't very small, or that big. I was confused and a little mad at myself for not getting a gift even though I have no idea why he was giving me this. I looked at him, I hate when he smiles at me like that, it makes me think that it is all a joke. I opened the box and found his dads dog tags inside. I became disgusted. “ What the hell is this? Why would you give me your most prize possession? Trace, this isn't very fun- “ “Leo” he interrupted for the second time tonight. “ Look at it, it has your name on it.” I took a closer look and saw it was true. It was in fake diamonds with script font. It was beautiful. I looked at him and asked “ why?” He didn't answer, I don't think he could. He took the necklace from the box and put it around my head.

I knew better than to ask again. Either he was going to tell me or I was going to have to figure it out. The length was exact. The tag ended right in the middle of my chest. This spot had more importance than ever, this was where he first listened to my heart, where I touch myself when I think, and the place he kisses me to turn me on. When I lifted my head to look at Trace, he touched my face and lifted my chin to kiss me. I didn't notice it before, but his eyes were filled with tears. He didn't start to cry till our lips touched. He embraced me like none before. Even though we have kissed before, this one was more....sincere, gentle, deeper, loving, sad. I started to cry too, didn't know why but I had an idea. He was leaving me. I prayed that this wouldn't happen but I knew that there was still a chance he would have to go.

I didn't want to pull away form him, he whispered, “ I love you Leo.” He said the magic words, I couldn't stop crying after that. The only thing I could do at that moment was to hold onto him tighter as if someone was going to take him away form me. We have never stated our love for each other. I whispered back, “ Trace, I love you as well.” At that moment I recognized that the music that was playing was Trace's guitar and his songs that he made up. He smiled and then he said “ Look on the back, my name is there. You're on the front of mine and then my dad's name on the back. I have the two men I love the most close to me.” I grinned, looked into his platinum eyes and thought this couldn't be the end of us. “ Trace, how long?” he didn't want to tell me, I knew he planned to leave me by surprise so it wouldn't hurt as much. I knew him too well. “How Long!” I yelled at him frustrated. “ We have until tomorrow at noon.” “ What? That's barely anytime.” “ I know Leo, I couldn't find myself to tell you sooner. Forgive me, but please don't leave my side tonight. I want my last moments to be with you.” I hated him for sounding so calm. “ Fine, what do we do now?” Trace smiled and took my hand. He led me to the other side of the balcony and he said “ Let's start with looking at this art work next.”

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