Secret part 2

October 17, 2009
By EternalMadness GOLD, Fresno, California
EternalMadness GOLD, Fresno, California
13 articles 1 photo 45 comments

Favorite Quote:
They say it's what you make
I say it's up to fate
It's woven in my soul
I need to let you go
Your eyes, they shine so bright
I want to save their light
I can't escape this now
Unless you show me how
When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide


“Cleare…” Jake called walking into the front door of her house without knocking, like normal. He had told her something the day before and she had run off in a shushed silence he knew to be fear. He had searched all over for her. He tried her house, here, first but she wasn’t there and none of her friends had seen her since they had seen her with him the night before.
He called out her name once more before walking completely in the front door and switching on the lights. He took in a deep breath as he observed the surrounding. The place had been ransacked, pillows thrown all over glass broken tables turned over. They knew that she knew.
Jake Sprinted up the stairs throwing open Cleare’s door and bursting inside in a split second. This room looked the same as the rooms downstairs. A knot grew in his throat as he reached for the tiny black cell phone in his shirt pocket. He was shaking so bad he could barely dial the numbers right and kept having to restart. Finally he got the number right and put the phone to his ear just as someone answered the other line.
“Bonjour?” silence.”Bonjour? Hello Jake??” he couldn’t speak to this voice. This is exactly who he hoped would not answer the phone and his heart was thumping violently.
“Hello Chantal, I am looking for Carel have you talked to him?” she laughed on the other end of the phone and he had the urge to rip her perfect face apart piece by piece. “Chantal are you going to let me talk to him or are you going to play with me all day long this is important!”
“vous obtiendrez-vous de lui parler, que voulez-vous?” He truly hated when she spoke to him in French he couldn’t make all of it out but this he understood as “you’ll talk to him when you tell me what you want”
“You know what I want Chantal stop playing these games he has my girlfriend!”
“Well my darling you truly should have thought about that before you told her our secret what were you’re reasoning’s for that anyways? You do not love her for if you did you wouldn’t have risked putting her in danger. You disgust me and this conversation is over. You know what will have to be done now. I hope you’re happy with yourself. She is quite lovely too… pretty skin, blushing cheeks, beautiful eyes. It’s a shame, really.” Click, the silence filled the phone and Jake shattered it under his grip throwing the pieces to the floor.
Now he regretted having told her… the secret he told her scared her away and now he didn’t know what would happen to her.
Not only could he hear her thoughts, his mind had been altered to have heightened senses, worse than that was that… he killed people. The people who had changed him had taught him to kill and that was all he knew of… he was thirsty for energy every day. He was worse than a “vampire”, worse than a serial killer. All he wanted was to be normal but that would never be. He knew what they would do to Cleare; he knew how she would be once they were done with her. And he’d be damned if that happen. Swiftly he ripped off his energy sensor throwing it to the ground. He had a few hours at the most before he would die... and he was going to make sure he saved her first.


The author's comments:
this is labeled as the 2nd part but in reality there is more too it. Enjoy the second part of secret!!

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This article has 17 comments.


on Feb. 3 2012 at 5:52 pm
Broken-Silence SILVER, N/A, New York
8 articles 0 photos 6 comments
great story i love both of them but i dont really get the secret can you explain please?

on Jan. 11 2012 at 1:47 pm
Goddess PLATINUM, Connellsville, Pennsylvania
27 articles 0 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.”

WOW!!! THAT WAS A MIND BLOWER.

on Oct. 16 2011 at 3:55 pm
XxilybbyxX SILVER, Saginaw, Michigan
5 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes we build up walls, not to keep people out; but to see who cares enough to break them down.

me too!!!! :)

on Nov. 15 2010 at 10:23 pm
Mortie PLATINUM, Oak Run, California
31 articles 0 photos 74 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whats The Point?

im sorry, but i liked the first one alot better... do keep writing tho...

hrf1434 GOLD said...
on Oct. 27 2010 at 9:25 pm
hrf1434 GOLD, Collierville, Tennessee
10 articles 4 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't Judge a Girl by Her Cover

You have to write more 

but I do like the firdt part better 

 

please look at my stuff

ttyl-hrf1434


on Sep. 15 2010 at 11:18 pm
Cameandgonesmarty ELITE, North Vancouver, Other
226 articles 4 photos 241 comments

I liked it a lot, but i still love the other part better.

amazing though.

update me plz!


on Jun. 14 2010 at 6:24 am
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

This is really great!  Add more!

on May. 23 2010 at 9:59 pm
paninilene DIAMOND, Long Beach, California
55 articles 3 photos 164 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Done & Over"

"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength."

"People should be able to say how they feel. How they really feel. Not, you know, some words that some strangers put in their mouth."

I'M LOST. but i wanna know more!! SO KEEP WRITING:)

on Mar. 20 2010 at 3:44 am
xoxoLissieM SILVER, Manila, Other
6 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Stop acting dumb cause your usually the smart one and I'm the dumb one!"

totally great!!! it gets better each tym!!

on Feb. 24 2010 at 11:03 pm
the-ampersand PLATINUM, Ogdensbury, New York
32 articles 1 photo 106 comments
ehh... a little twilight-ish, but not too bad. will be on the look out for more. =.=

twiwrite GOLD said...
on Feb. 24 2010 at 2:45 pm
twiwrite GOLD, Modesto, California
14 articles 0 photos 111 comments

Favorite Quote:
none :P

???? i am really confused! what just happened?

on Feb. 22 2010 at 6:24 am
I understand it all and personally think its great. I love how you use more than one language. I speak both English and French.

on Feb. 2 2010 at 9:23 pm
MarinaOreo GOLD, King Of Prussia, Pennsylvania
12 articles 0 photos 148 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Your soul is the whole world" -Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse

i like it!!! so i'm still kind of lost on the secret but keep going!

tanaya BRONZE said...
on Jan. 11 2010 at 7:04 pm
tanaya BRONZE, Edison, New Jersey
4 articles 0 photos 21 comments
Twilightish! But GREAT!

Didn't get the conversation though!

on Dec. 18 2009 at 11:03 am
ohh_its_manda SILVER, Arden, North Carolina
5 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
Poetry is finer and more philosophical than history; for poetry expresses the universal, and history only the particular.” Aristotle (384 BC - 322 BC)

I understand the first and lst part, but the phone conversation is very confusing.

on Nov. 27 2009 at 12:16 am
EternalMadness GOLD, Fresno, California
13 articles 1 photo 45 comments

Favorite Quote:
They say it's what you make
I say it's up to fate
It's woven in my soul
I need to let you go
Your eyes, they shine so bright
I want to save their light
I can't escape this now
Unless you show me how
When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide

no, its ok! i like critisism.

what part exactly don't you understand? and do you understand the first part at all?

maddi79 said...
on Nov. 26 2009 at 10:37 pm
hey not to be rude but you lost me after the picture showed. i even read the first part and i still don't get it.


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