Killer Eyes; part 4

October 10, 2009
By unwrittenlove DIAMOND, Mount Berry, Georgia
unwrittenlove DIAMOND, Mount Berry, Georgia
61 articles 11 photos 153 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be" -anonymous


It felt as if I was in a dream. There was a glowing light and many faces came into view. They all had on surgical masks and caps. Suddenly pain shot up my left leg and I closed my eyes in anguish. I opened my mouth as if to scream and thrash about but nothing came out. A sharp tugging began on my leg and I kept my eyes closed, terrified of what I would see. Then there was a hushed silence.

“We did it,” someone whispered approvingly. Some others murmured in agreement. “The anesthetic is wearing off. He should wake up in a few moments. Let’s get him to another room.” I opened my eyes hoping to see everything but it was still fuzzy. I knew I was moving down a hallway, then being pushed into a room. Everyone left and I lifted my hand to rub my eyes. My arm weighed a hundred pounds as I lifted it up. After rubbing my eyes, everything became clear. I blinked as a figure came into view. She had patches of brown hair on her hand and a small figure of a dancer’s that looked as if I could snap it in two.

“Mark?” She said my name as a question to make sure it was really me. I couldn’t remember who it was. She looked familiar in a way but unfamiliar in others. Her skin had a sickly glow to it and her cheeks were sunken in. She raised a hand and stroked my hair with her cold, boney fingers. “It’s me, Alex.”

“Who?” I asked. The name was not registering with me. Tears clung to her eyelashes as she took hold of my hand. My mind scrambled backwards trying to remember. Suddenly a picture of a girl hesitated in my mind. In the picture the girl was laughing and she had long brown hair, past her shoulders. Her eyes were a lovely shade of blue with violet tinting the edges. Alex was so beautiful. I froze and looked at the girl in front of me. Her eyes were the same color of the girl’s in my memory. Tears were flowing freely down her face and she held on tighter. I could feel the IV needle in her translucent skin and risked a peek at her monitor. Her heart rate was slowing; she was losing the battle.

“Please remember,” she sobbed letting her head fall down.

“Alex, please don’t cry,” I reassured her. She looked up; a smiled was painted across her face. It just wasn’t fair to see her so happy when she was going to die soon. “How much longer?”

“Five hours.” Her face faltered just a bit and her smile was less natural. “It’s okay though.”

I squeezed her hand and said, “I love you Alex.” She looked at me with such adoration that tears formed in my eyes. I wiped them away and looked back at her. “You need to go back to your room.

“Let me stay with you,” she pleaded. I hesitated before nodding. Grinning she scrambled onto my bed and curled up beside me. “Oh, and I love you too.”

I fell asleep with her in my arms. I awoke to the sound of hushed voices in my room. I kept my eyes closed and breathing even to eavesdrop on them.

“I can’t believe it,” the first person said. “That girl is still alive. Her heart rate is speeding up by the hour and look at her skin color.”

“How could that happen?” the second person asked. “The doctor was so sure she was going to die last night.” There was some sounds of furniture being moved and then footsteps were heading towards the door.

“They must really love each other. Look at the way he has his arm around her. It looks like he is protecting her from something.” The voices faded away and I lifted my eyelids. Sunlight was streaming through the curtains and it fell on the person next to me. Alex’s skin had a more natural look and she was breathing more evenly. Her dark hair was still in patches but I knew it was going to grow back. I could hear her heart beat in sync to mine. She was going to live.

I looked down at my leg. It had taken some work but the prosthetic leg was nicely attached. I tried moved it; it worked. I couldn’t help but smile as I sat up in the bed. Alex inhaled beside me and her eyes fluttered open. I marveled at the beauty of them before speaking.

“Just letting you know, I love you,” I said before leaning down and kissing her upturned lips. She kissed me back in earnest then pulled away. I frowned and she laughed lightly.

“Are you dead too?” she inquired. I chuckled and shook my head.

“No, we are both very much alive,” I replied. She grinned wider and paused before asking me her next question.

“Then, do I get another kiss?” I rolled my eyes but leaned down once more to press my lips to hers. Our second kiss wasn’t like our first. It was better, much better.

4 years later
I took one more glance at my prosthetic leg before gathering my stuff and heading down the corridor. I saw Coach Cummers and paused as he shook my hand.
“Great game Waters,” he congratulated me with a firm hand shake.
“Thanks coach,” I answered before leaving him in the hallway. I opened the doors to the parking lot and glanced around for my ride. My dark green eyes paused on words etched into the sidewalk: MW+AD 4EVA. I grinned at the memory and hitched my bag higher on my shoulder. A car horn jolted me out of my daydream. A red Eclipse was waiting a few feet away and the person laid on the horn again. I ran to the passenger’s side and hopped in.
“How was the game?” she asked quietly.
“We won. What’s wrong? What happened at the doctor’s?” my voice rose with hysteria. She put a small hand on my arm.
“It’s gone.” She smiled up at me and looked at me with those blue-violet eyes of hers. I smiled.
“Forever?” I asked.
“Forever,” she repeated and gave my arm a squeeze. Cancer free for 2 years and now for the rest of my life.”
“That’s amazing,” I said gazing into her eyes. She blushed but her eyes didn’t stray from mine.
“I love you,” she murmured.
“I love you,” I quoted her. Alex, my wife, my best friend, and love of my life leaned in to give me a kiss.
“Just don’t forget it,” she teased before pressing her lips to mine


The author's comments:
Last part of Alex's and Mark's story!

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This article has 27 comments.


on Jun. 14 2011 at 11:02 pm
bunbun74 SILVER, Fort Collins, Colorado
6 articles 0 photos 36 comments
i could have cried in this! you should feel very proud of this i can't believe how astonishingly brilliant this is! i have never been close to tears in anyones work, anyones. not even in ones that are published. you are a fantastic writer keep writing! :D :')

TorioT4 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 12 2011 at 3:39 pm
TorioT4 BRONZE, Rural Hall, North Carolina
4 articles 4 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
you have two chocies in every situtaion: make it or break it. Choose wisely.
- Me

this is one of my favorite pieces on teen ink i love it soo muchh ive read soo many timess and i cant get enough!

KellyR GOLD said...
on Nov. 18 2010 at 12:56 pm
KellyR GOLD, Richmond, Virginia
14 articles 0 photos 258 comments

Favorite Quote:
We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.

I agree I really liked the third part to the story but then I read this one and was a bit dissapointed.

on Nov. 9 2010 at 2:29 pm
Robsessed PLATINUM, McKinney, Texas
36 articles 14 photos 214 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I may be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it." - Maya Angelou

"Did you know 'I told you so' has a brother, Jacob?" she asked cutting me off. "His name is 'Shut the hell up.'" - Bella Swan, Breaking Dawn

Your story is a nice concept and I like it for what it is, but some of it is completely unrealistic and the character development/relationship was rushed.

on Oct. 15 2010 at 12:23 pm
_Rose_Red_ BRONZE, Many, Louisiana
4 articles 1 photo 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Sometimes the dreams that come true, are the dreams that you never even knew you had!"

GREAT!!

on Sep. 23 2010 at 3:25 pm
freewriter_123 SILVER, Miramar, Florida
6 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door." ;)

Best story ever!

on Jun. 26 2010 at 7:44 am
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

And btw, anyone who sees this, will you check out and comment on my work?

Thrush BRONZE said...
on Jun. 12 2010 at 9:21 am
Thrush BRONZE, Tegaad, Other
4 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Live life to it's fullest extent, it's the only life you've got" "Enjoy yourself, be yourself, love yourself"

This is the best. I love everything about it. I read the second part first, but I went insane then read it all. I love everything about this.  When this gets published, I will buy it. Oh my god I love this.

on Jun. 5 2010 at 7:05 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

Love how you ended it!  I'm a sucker for those kind of endings.  I know they're not as "realistic" as the depressing ones, but I love to read a happy ending.

on May. 21 2010 at 7:49 am
MelissaHoll BRONZE, New City, New York
2 articles 0 photos 5 comments
Amazing ending!

on May. 17 2010 at 12:13 pm
meganleigh122 GOLD, Greeneville, Tennessee
13 articles 0 photos 81 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain."

this was really good!! i loved it!!! i read all of them, and this is one of the best things i have read on this website! it can be stretched out, but it is really good as is. please keep writing :) and can you check out some of my stuff?:P thanks

on Apr. 24 2010 at 6:57 am
unwrittenlove DIAMOND, Mount Berry, Georgia
61 articles 11 photos 153 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be" -anonymous

thanks so much! You can read Alex's version of it. It's called Guardian Angel. THatns for the support :)

on Apr. 22 2010 at 1:54 pm
LeeAnn1996 GOLD, Vernon, Alabama
11 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
There's nothing to be afraid of if you face it first.

I absolutely loved it. I love all of them and I hope you keep writing.

on Apr. 21 2010 at 4:16 pm
xBaByGiRrL22x PLATINUM, Pearl River, New York
22 articles 0 photos 281 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The goal isn't to live forever, but create something that will."
"If you wanna go, baby let's go; if you wanna rock, I'm ready to roll.''
"No one ever said it'd be easy. They just said it'd be worth it." <3

aww thatz so sweet. i luv the ending! it gives a twist on how life cant last forever, while love can. these 2 lucky ones got a 2nd chance;) gr8 jobb

on Apr. 3 2010 at 1:15 pm
Green8a8 SILVER, NY, New York
8 articles 1 photo 161 comments

Favorite Quote:
im the author of my life, unfortunately im writing in pen therefore i can't erase nothing about it.-by some crazy friend of mine

oooooh

omg this was so cuuute and beautiful

loved it


on Mar. 31 2010 at 8:39 pm
writergirl13 GOLD, Cherry Hill, New Jersey
11 articles 8 photos 261 comments

Favorite Quote:
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
Ambrose Bierce

AAAWWWWW!!!!!! That's so amazing! I read all of the parts (1-4) and loved them!

Meli138 said...
on Mar. 9 2010 at 6:45 pm
Meli138, GP, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 56 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Like a bird with broken wings its not how high he flies but the song he sings"
"Everybody live like its the last day you will ever see tell me tell me do you feel the pressure now?"

Wow! Great job! The story was alittle too rushed but i loved it anyways! If you slow it down and stretch it out a bit more than it will be even better because the readers will get more attached to the characters. I LOVED the pasrt where he was "protecting her from something" how sweet! :D GREAT JOB!

on Mar. 1 2010 at 7:10 pm
thewritingclarinetist, Port Orange, Florida
0 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Those who try, are those who plan on failing.

that was so good! it was such a touching story. you could easily turn this into a book. bravo!

on Feb. 8 2010 at 8:28 am
unwrittenlove DIAMOND, Mount Berry, Georgia
61 articles 11 photos 153 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be" -anonymous

Thanks so much! I didn't think it was that good but a lot of people liked it. haha

on Feb. 7 2010 at 7:19 pm
monstrosity BRONZE, Hood River, Oregon
1 article 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
He who laughs last didn't get it.

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

WOW-- that is the perfect ending! I was afraid that it would be another heartbreaking ending, but it was absolutely perfect! Sometimes you just need to read stories where people pull through :)


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