Killer Eyes; part 2 | Teen Ink

Killer Eyes; part 2

September 27, 2009
By unwrittenlove DIAMOND, Mount Berry, Georgia
unwrittenlove DIAMOND, Mount Berry, Georgia
61 articles 11 photos 153 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be" -anonymous


I looked out the small window and tried to imagine I was in another place. I tried not to listen to the erratic beeping of the machines and the low breathing of the person beside me. The winter trees and snow on the ground seemed like a different world.
I turned my head back around and my green eyes focused on the figure of a girl curled up on the bed. Her pale skin glowed weirdly under the fluorescent lights. Her shoulders moved up and down in sync to her breathing. I reached over and stroked her hair away from her face. Her head moved under me; I froze. She turned her head towards me and her eyes fluttered open.
“Who are you?” she demanded. Her voice was hoarse, like she had been yelling all day. “Why are you here? Who let you in? Help,” she cried out. I covered her mouth with my hand.
“Sh, be quiet,” I told her. “My name is Mark. I rescued you the other day at school when you collapsed.” She sat up in her bed; I tried to push her back down but she wouldn’t budge.
“You were my guardian angel?” she said. I frowned in confusion.
“Guardian angel?”
“I thought I was going to die because an angel came and saved me.” She looked up at me with those beautiful eyes of hers. I grinned. I had never been described as an angel.
“Well, you aren’t dead, that’s for sure. You are in the hospital. Can I ask one thing?” She nodded. “Why did you collapse? The doctor wouldn’t tell me anything. Not even on the ride to the hospital.”
“You rode with me to the hospital?”
“Don’t change the subject.” She blushed; the blood crept up her cheeks slowly. I smiled at the normal color.
“I will tell you only if you answer my question.” She paused waiting for me to nod. When I did she continued, “I have leukemia.” I feel my eyes widen but don’t utter a sound. She looks away ashamed.
“You don’t look like you have cancer,” I blurted out. It was the first thing that came to my mind and I instantly regretted them. Flames burned in her eyes as she turned back to me.
“So what? I have to be bald or weak to have cancer?” Her heart rate went up, I could tell, because the beeping got faster. I shook my head.
“No, it’s not like that. I just thought… I’m sorry,” I rushed to get the words out. I saw her shoulders relax and then she looked down at her hands.
“Now you have to answer my question,” she said quietly.
“Okay.” I didn’t want to upset her even more.
“Why do you care so much about me? Why did you come here?” She turned the full intensity of her eyes on me. It was my turn to look down.
“You were different. You didn’t care that Carrie was talking about you or didn’t act shy in school. You had this aurora of confidence around you,” I paused looking at her reaction. Tears were welling up in her eyes. “And you had killer eyes.”
“Thanks,” she sounded choked up. Courageously, she took my hand from my lap and squeezed it. “Don’t leave me. Stay with me ‘till I die.” I wanted to shout at her. I wanted to say that she wasn’t going to die. But I swallowed back my words and nodded.
“I will,” I swore.
“Oh, and call me Alex.” She smiled at me-such a beautiful sight-and closed her eyes. I held onto her hand as she fell asleep. I knew then that I was in love.


The author's comments:
Sequel to Killer Eyes

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This article has 29 comments.


on Jun. 3 2012 at 9:57 pm
KateLovesMusicAndArt BRONZE, Mesa, Arizona
4 articles 20 photos 32 comments
Amazing! I love it! I love how with both parts you have had a GREAT ending! Keep it up! :)

on Jun. 14 2011 at 10:55 pm
bunbun74 SILVER, Fort Collins, Colorado
6 articles 0 photos 36 comments
again, this was so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so AWESOME! this should be a book!

breebree said...
on Jun. 3 2011 at 10:50 pm

me too im so gonna read part one i bet its just as great

 


on May. 23 2011 at 12:52 pm
Mojo4133 BRONZE, Tropy Club, Texas
3 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
“It's all fun and games, until someone looses an eye...than it's fun and games you can't see anymore.”
-James Hetfield

Same Here! Love it!

breebree said...
on Mar. 25 2011 at 11:25 pm
i think this was very good.......keep writin id love to know what happens

on Nov. 9 2010 at 4:43 pm
this is ok, but you go waaaayyyy too fast! you seem like you just want to get to the romance in the way you write. but good job, just go allot slower next time!

shedevil said...
on Nov. 9 2010 at 7:49 am
shedevil, Spotsylvania, Virginia
0 articles 0 photos 31 comments
A little fast , and you shifted tenses but overall it was really good (:

on Sep. 23 2010 at 3:10 pm
freewriter_123 SILVER, Miramar, Florida
6 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door." ;)

This was AMAZING! but (I hate saying this word) its going by a little to fast. Slow it down more and add a little more detail.

AnnieHay said...
on Sep. 8 2010 at 5:51 pm
AnnieHay, Glendale, New York
0 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.~Ferris Beuller
The past is the future with the lights on.~Plus 44

its pretty good, but everything just happens so fast! maybe a litle more detail?

on Sep. 4 2010 at 11:38 pm
EmmyGrangerDC BRONZE, Houston, Texas
4 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.

Why is it that the one who made you cry is the only one that can keep you from crying? - Anonymous

Be careful. You're shifting tenses. make sure it stays just past tense or just present.

TaylorLlover said...
on Aug. 13 2010 at 9:46 am
TaylorLlover, East Meadow, New York
0 articles 0 photos 11 comments
Plz continue this,you are a great writter

on Jul. 22 2010 at 9:29 pm
Sincerly,Jasmine SILVER, Villa Park, Illinois
7 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Beauty comes in its own box"

ahmazing plz keep goin

on Jun. 30 2010 at 7:53 pm
emoVamp247 BRONZE, Port Saint Lucie, Florida
1 article 0 photos 28 comments
that should be longer but i loved it.

Thrush BRONZE said...
on Jun. 12 2010 at 9:11 am
Thrush BRONZE, Tegaad, Other
4 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Live life to it's fullest extent, it's the only life you've got" "Enjoy yourself, be yourself, love yourself"

So sweet. It's making me cry.

on Jun. 5 2010 at 6:56 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

Very sweet, I read Guardian Angel too, it just seems like it went rather fast.  Exceptionally good though.

on May. 14 2010 at 5:13 pm
Teiralovessugar SILVER, Sweet Home, Oregon
8 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
" Never Underestimate the Power of LOVE!"

this is the most amazing series i have ever read on here! omg luv it!!!

on May. 14 2010 at 3:04 pm
Anique_ThePoet GOLD, Indianapolis, Indiana
10 articles 33 photos 111 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A writer should write with his eyes and painter paint with his ears." ~Gertrude Stein~

what a twist with her cancer. its still beautiful though.

twingirl4 said...
on Apr. 29 2010 at 7:03 pm
that was soooo good! I love the twisty love going on! good job!

on Apr. 22 2010 at 1:44 pm
LeeAnn1996 GOLD, Vernon, Alabama
11 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
There's nothing to be afraid of if you face it first.

I read the first one and loved it and I love this one just as much!

on Apr. 21 2010 at 4:01 pm
xBaByGiRrL22x PLATINUM, Pearl River, New York
22 articles 0 photos 281 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The goal isn't to live forever, but create something that will."
"If you wanna go, baby let's go; if you wanna rock, I'm ready to roll.''
"No one ever said it'd be easy. They just said it'd be worth it." <3

i agree, but i really like this!!


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