Defying Love | Teen Ink

Defying Love MAG

May 24, 2009
By awesomeaugust GOLD, Boston, Massachusetts
awesomeaugust GOLD, Boston, Massachusetts
10 articles 0 photos 176 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Keep your eyes on the stars and your feet on the ground"
~Theordore Roosevelt


I didn't want to like him. He was just so charming.

This might sound like every other love story, and it may be, but it may not. If you don't read on, you'll never know.

My name is Emily Brown, which I've always been quite happy with. I think it makes me sound pleasant but ordinary, and I prefer to blend in. Now, I suppose it's only polite to tell you a bit about myself before I jump into my story. I am five feet, two inches, have brown hair that comes to my shoulders, and I am not talented in any special way. These are the basic facts of me, and I think these are all I ought to tell you.

His name was Andrew Rivers and he was perfectly wonderful in every way. When he first came to my school in twelfth grade, he was a bit eccentric and didn't fit in right away. He was into music and played the drums and the guitar, although he wasn't good at either. What he was good at was singing, and when he did, you wanted to cry and laugh and sing along with him all at once.

My name is Emily Brown and his was Andrew Rivers and I loved him.

About two months into my last year of high school, Andrew asked me out. I was surprised since I had hardly ever talked to him, but I didn't have a boyfriend, and I didn't know how to say no.

It may help you to know that at my school there were couples that were simply together for the name, and some that were together only to have a date for dances and for kissing and other such things. When Andrew asked me out I had no idea what his intentions were, and I didn't like having no idea. I'm by no means a confrontational person, but I was starting to feel offended that after I had said that I would date him, he hadn't said another word to me. So I went up to him and we had a little talk.

Me: “Hey, Andrew.”

Andrew: “Hey.”

Me: “So …”

Andrew: (annoyingly, nothing)

Me: “You asked me out.”

Andrew: (nothing again)

Me: “Why?”

Andrew: “Why'd I ask you out?”

Me: “Right.”

Andrew: “I felt like it.”

Me: (irritated) “You felt like it?”

Andrew: “That's what I said, isn't it?”

Me: (infuriated) “I'm sorry. Actually I'm not. I didn't realize you were such a jerk, and I don't want to go out with you anymore.” (I'd never dumped someone before, okay?)

Andrew: “Are you dumping me?”

Me: “What do you think?”

Andrew: “Why?”

Me: “I feel like it.”

Andrew: (smiling) “Do you like Chinese food?”

Me: “I hate it.”

Andrew: “You've never had it.”

Me: “How do you know?”

Andrew: (laughing) “I'm good at reading people.”

Me: “Well, obviously you suck, because I've had Chinese food a million times and I hated it every time.”

Andrew: “Would you like to go out with me tonight?”

Me: “You're asking me on a date?”

Andrew: “Yes.”

Me: “Read my answer.”

Andrew: “Wonderful! I'll see you tonight. Be ready by six. Ish. Sixish.”

I hated this strange boy who I'd only really talked to twice. He made me infuriated. The only problem was, I couldn't figure out if I liked that or not.

That night at sixish sharp, Andrew showed up at my doorstep. My parents have never been into meeting my boyfriends, but as I was stepping out, he stepped in. He walked right into the living room where my parents sat watching the baseball game.

When he came back out I asked, “What'd you say?”

“I told them I'd have you back by eight.”

“Ish?”

He laughed. “Nope. Just eight.”

We didn't talk much on the car ride. He had a CD playing that sounded kind of like Bob Marley, but I'd never heard the song before. It wasn't until we got there that I realized I didn't know where we were going. A small sign stood in front of the building but the name was too peeled away for me to be able to read it. What I could read was the sign beneath where the name should be, and it said, “The best Chinese cuisine for miles.”

“Chinese, huh?”

He smirked.

We walked inside and it was only then that I realized exactly how small the building was. There were little tables in the center of the room, about five of them, and a couch against one wall for sitting while you waited. As if. There was no waiting; we were the only customers. A sign read “PLEASE SEAT YOURSELF,” but I guess because of the lack of business, a waiter came over to seat us. He tried to show us to a table, but Andrew said, “Oh, no, thank you. We'll be sitting down here.”

He strolled over to the couch and at first I thought he wanted us to sit there, but then he grabbed two pillows and placed them on the ground a little way away from the tables.

I looked at him, baffled.

“Authenticity,” he said, smiling. He was always smiling.

I, personally, couldn't see how sitting on the floor was authentic.

***

There were many other dates, all very unusual. I was used to dances and movies, but with Andrew I got sunsets and local concerts. Once he took me to a bingo night that his aunt was hosting. Oddly enough, that was the night we first kissed.

I remember so clearly the day of graduation, the day I realized that Andrew and I wouldn't always be together. After we threw our hats and got our diplomas, he found me.

“End of high school, huh?” he said.

“Yeah.”

“What do you want to do, Emily?”

“With my life?”

“Sure.”

“Be with you.”

He didn't smile like I wanted him to.

“Don't you want to go to college?”

I sighed. “Want to, or have to?”

Now he smiled. “You choose.”

“I should. Go to college, I mean. I found one that'll accept me.”

There was a long pause before I said, “Andrew, what about you?”

“What about me?”

“What are you gonna do?”

“I dunno. Do what I do best, I guess. Play my music.”

“Oh. Yeah. That's cool. See you later?”

“When would I see you?”

“I see what you mean.”

“Bye, Emily.”

“Bye.”

Thinking back, I wish I had said something better than bye. I wish I had told him that I loved him more than words could describe and that when he sang to me I felt like I was all that mattered in the world. I wanted to tell him that if he had just asked, I wouldn't have gone to college. I would have played his music with him.

I'm sitting at my computer right now, looking at a name on the screen on a website called “peoplefinder.” I want to call him and hear his voice, but I'm afraid. I'm afraid that he won't be my same Andrew.

I get a glass of cold water and sit on my couch. I picture myself having one last conversation with him.

Me: “Hey, Andrew.” (I say it so casually, just like old times.)

Andrew: “Hey, Emily.”

Me: “Why are you wearing a tie?”

Andrew: “Why shouldn't I be?”

Me: “I don't know.”

Andrew: “I have a job.”

Me: “Good.”

Andrew: “I'm a lawyer, Emily.”

Me: “That's great.”

Andrew: “You don't sound like that's great.”

Me: “Don't I?”

Andrew: “I live in an apartment in the city. I talk on the phone with other businesspeople.”

Me: “I'm proud of you.”

Andrew: “I have a diploma hanging up on the wall of my office. My office.”

Me: “Do you play music anymore, Andrew?”

Andrew: “Music.”

He looks at me as if he doesn't remember the word.

Andrew: “No, I don't play my music anymore.”

Me: “Oh.”

Me: “I loved you, Andrew.”

Andrew: “Loved? Past tense?”

Me: “I think so.”

Andrew: “I love you.”

Me: “Why'd you ask me out?”

Andrew: “I thought you were beautiful and smart, and I loved how shiny your dark brown hair was. I liked how you weren't too loud, and you didn't wear low-cut shirts like most other girls.”

Me: “I wish you'd said, ‘Because I felt like it.'”

Andrew: “Sorry.”

Me: “Me too.”

Andrew: “I have to be going.”

Me: “Yeah.”

Me: “Wait!”

Andrew: “Yes?”

Me: “I'd never had Chinese food before.”



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This article has 542 comments.


on Jun. 5 2011 at 11:24 pm
bunbun74 SILVER, Fort Collins, Colorado
6 articles 0 photos 36 comments
this is so awesome, i luv this. 

on Jun. 5 2011 at 9:38 pm
A.PaigeTurner, San Antonio, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 125 comments

Favorite Quote:
You think that everybody hates you. You should really stop that.- A Good Friend

I'm scared of sad endings like that happening to me.  It's one of my worst fears, but I know I'd be okay.  If I did get hurt, I'd just write about it.  That's all I can do. 

PennyM.L said...
on Jun. 5 2011 at 8:52 pm
makes me sad too. :( it's so true,  everything ends. even the sweetest things.

PennyM.L said...
on Jun. 5 2011 at 8:50 pm
I love it. it made me cry. :<

on Jun. 5 2011 at 8:38 pm
october34 SILVER, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
6 articles 2 photos 12 comments
oh my gohs that story was so sweet! i wish it were longer...

Camii GOLD said...
on Jun. 5 2011 at 6:28 pm
Camii GOLD, Miami, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 75 comments
It's  a wonderful story! i just loved it(:

on Jun. 5 2011 at 3:17 pm
TheMalfunctioningWallflower BRONZE, Houston, Texas
1 article 0 photos 45 comments

Favorite Quote:
"GET THE CAT!!!"

"I did wood paneling."

"Do not FEAR the Crooked Zipper!! EMBRACE the Crooked Zipper!!!"

"What's better than infinity?"

"Wear your helmets, we'll be reaching speeds of three!"

"You could walk on your hands and catch up to him!"

I love this story. It's so unique, like Andrew, Emily, and their relationship.

on Jun. 5 2011 at 1:39 pm
ClarityRedemption BRONZE, Bloomsburg, Pennsylvania
4 articles 2 photos 4 comments
Really good story! It feels real, and true.

on Jun. 5 2011 at 1:08 pm
NKsunshine BRONZE, Palatine, Illinois
1 article 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I don't need easy, I just need possible!" ~Bethany Hamilton

B.E.A.U.T.F.U.L itz as simple as tht;)

sbear406 GOLD said...
on Jun. 5 2011 at 10:06 am
sbear406 GOLD, Summit, New Jersey
10 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.
Read more at

such a beautiful and unique story! great job!!

on Jun. 5 2011 at 8:57 am
Stefegg PLATINUM, Maysville, Missouri
21 articles 0 photos 78 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited, imagination encircles the world."

I always fall in love with the stories that don't have happy endings. I wish you would have called him, but you ended the story well.  Good job!

RRRRR BRONZE said...
on Jun. 5 2011 at 12:05 am
RRRRR BRONZE, Orrville, Ohio
1 article 1 photo 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Education is when you read the fine print. Experience is when you don't."- Pete Seeger

"I didn't quit because I wasn't strong enough to live through it, i stopped because i was strong enough to move on." -Unknown

I don't know what to say. i fell in love with both of the characters. It was such an odd plot, but a truly captivating one. Wonderful job!

angel 25468 said...
on Jun. 1 2011 at 2:24 pm
i think that  it is a very lovelly story and that  it shoulde keep going make then get mairred

Sierra:D said...
on May. 25 2011 at 9:12 pm
i kinda feel like saying this was beatiful. bittersweet things have always been beautiful to me. good job. really, good job.

on May. 16 2011 at 7:41 pm
paigeforeman GOLD, Washington, District Of Columbia
18 articles 6 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible!"-Walt Disney
"It's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years."- Abraham Lincoln
"Be the change you wish to see in the world."-Gandhi
"The truth is out there."-The X-Files

Cute, but bittersweet at the same time. Good job, I loved it! :-)

on May. 14 2011 at 5:16 pm
Whitehouse503 SILVER, North Waterboro, Maine
7 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the end you should always do the right thing, even if it's hard."

This is th best story I've ever read

on May. 14 2011 at 4:08 pm
allegrettoBrioso, New Milford, Connecticut
0 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible." -Walt Disney

Aww, this is good!

on May. 14 2011 at 3:12 pm
AndySixxLover GOLD, Weatherford, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
These violent delights have violent ends and in there triumph die like fire and powder in witch their kiss consume

OMG i started to cry this was sso good i love it!!!!

cheerfreak25 said...
on May. 14 2011 at 1:43 pm
cheerfreak25, Adel, Iowa
0 articles 0 photos 10 comments
i absolutely love it!!!!

bandi_bandi said...
on May. 14 2011 at 1:44 am
bandi_bandi, Mountain Home, Idaho
0 articles 0 photos 5 comments
I like this story because it's real. Let me tell you why: most high school relationships don't last. And people grow older and get stupid jobs and lose sight of the things they love. (Sorry, didn't mean to rant). Anyway, this is good. Like bitter dark chocolate.