Habits are a base of our everyday lives. Habits are something that sometimes a human being can't get over or maybe they can but they just don't see an end to their journey.  Whether its a life journey or any kind of obstacle in their way. There are times when you don't have any control over how your life path begins or ends, but you just keep going. The sunrises and sunsets are just like when we go to bed and wake up the next morning to see the sunlight and close them to hear the silence in the darkness.
  Eventually all sounds have an ending, but not just sounds everything around us does too. We may just not realize it right in the moment when it is happening. Like every leaf that falls from the trees arms eventually comes back to sleep with the earth. You are probably asking yourself why I'm writing about this but no worries I asked myself the same question but it's just the way I feel sometimes because I have had a illness sounds worse than what it is but it's still pretty severe but not to bad , yet its something that the doctors don't really know the answer too.There are just times where I feel like there isn't ever going to be an end to what I feel but I'm not alone I have my family who is very supportive of me not only that but I also have my friends who are always there to support me.
You are probably asking yourself again if you have all this support from the people whom you love and they love you why is it that you feel this way. I feel this way because my dad has always told me “Life is not always fair” Sometimes he doesn't even have to say it because I'll see him standing there with his perfectly ironed cool comfortable yet dressy outfit and I'll look at him and it's like his looks speak to me or maybe I just grew up hearing that phrase so often that it's just become a part of me. The reason I said that habits are a foundation of our lives is because I have a habit of feeling guilty or bad for things I can't control that are out of my reach and power. I feel that my parents don't deserve to have to be worried of me constantly to the point that i'm the only thing on their mind were they are asking themselves 24/7 “Is she okay?’ “will she be fine?’’ I don’t want my parents to feel that way because my mom is like the type of person that once you look at her everything seems to be okay she comforts you without saying a word, but then again, I can tell she isn't happy but she's not the best at hiding it, or maybe i'm just really good at sensing people's emotions which I have been told that may times.  I also kind of have to comfort myself sometimes because I realize that I can't control my health or anybody else's conditions it would be nice too but very unreasonable , but then I stop and think that there are children with parents out there who ask or pray that their child will wake up the next morning to see their child's smile no matter the weather. Well my sickness is not something that I can really explain because the doctors honestly don't have a specific name to my illness all they say when I go for my monthly check ups is just be careful because if I start feeling drowsy they suggest I lay off on my sports but that is one of the most challenging  thing that this sickness has given me. When I first heard that I wasn't going to be able to do track if I didn't start to feel better or show growth or some sort of improvement in my health no matter what I just wasn't going to be able to run . Rightnow you may be thinking what's the big deal you just won't be able to run track for the season, but in my case this sport means a lot to me maybe not as much as volleyball but it still is very meaningful and significant . Ever since I was this small cute dolly looking ? year old  girl who was never been afraid to do anything or try anything ,”daredevil” as my parents would call me. I've just always have had a passion for the sports I decide to do, and running was the very first sport I decided to join. My dad is my main supporter in the sports I do so I have grown up listening to all his stories about the sports he has played and done but that one story he always wants to tell me when I feel like giving up , is the one about his “desired hardworking loving girls first race” “My favorite part of that story is seeing your cute little face at the starting line filled with determination  wasn't exactly what I expected to see , I expected to see some fear but fear is what I kept thinking that you imagined what the other runners thought of you by the way you turned your head and looked at the rest if the runners” That was probably one of the best days of my life when she completed her very first race but that didn't last long, I remember her almost reaching the finish line with this desperate look on her face, it was like she needed something. Few minutes passed before she was on the floor crying and pleading for air barely breathing or taking you could hear her whisper “I can barely breathe daddy” so I got up and took her to the car not even taking her medal from the lady calling her number 202 but I kept walking as I held her tight racing back towards the car I could feel her stroking my hair with her tiny hands yet  she was holding on tight as she is crying. I trying my best to calm her down as I say “tough girls don't cry” she just stared at me blankly with her big brown eyes without saying a word as she wipes her tears of her face and now starting to breathe a little bit more normally and not as heavy as she was after the race she reaches her head over and says “okay” and I get out of the car and go back to her car seat and I reach over and wipe her face and pull her ash brown hair back into her ponytail she just looks up at me as her eyes sparkle and she wrinkles up her nose as she gives me that heart warming smile as I close the door behind me and step back into the car. I stand there with a few minutes of silence and I decide to call her mom to tell her what had happened but I called her a couple times and she wouldn't pick so I decided to leave a voice message but it just gives me the feeling of like Im shouting into a black hole. About a week had passed since the race and we decided that we wanted to send her in so that they could check her health and make sure everything was okay and not two days from that week that we had taken her in we got a phone call saying that we had to meet up so they could share the results they would much rather do it in person than over the phone. So we had decided to meet up the very next morning at 10am, as we walk into the building we look for the office number he had given us and I jerked my head to a door at the very end of this very dark hallway yet at the end where the door was there was a little blue light peeking from under the door. So we decide to enter and there he was standing their with his neatly tucked in shirt and looking very serious and mature, yet he greets us with a smile and says “alright so here are the results. She is a very healthy child all she needs is iron in her system and he have provided you with some antibiotics for her to take daily and we will hopefully see some results in about a month or two” and so we sit their kind of clueless with about nothing to say and we thank him and some tears roll down my wifes face because the other clinic we had gone to before told us that she could have something really wrong with her so her tears were more tears of joy than anything else. We were happy to have heard that there is nothing wrong with our sweet hearted loving little girl.